The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!

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Entries Authored By: Neal

168 Entries on This Page


In the Beginning... AKA: The Origin

Neal met George workin' on the farm. George always promised Neal he'd see the rabbits.After a falling out, they met years later on a city bus. Wait, did I say bus? I meant brothel.

Tags: brothel(2) business ventures(46) origin(24) rabbits(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 742/4182
Added: 02/09/2009


Peaches and CREAM!

Years later, Neal and George had limited success as the Rollerderby team, "Peaches and CREAM!"


Peaches and CREAM! - They were sensational!

Tags: rollerderby(1) sports(24)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 396/2507
Added: 02/10/2009



In an effort to unify religions, George and Neal combined Easter and Yom Kippur, (known as "EastKippur"). Unfortunately, this resulted in a cruel irony wherein children are surrounded by chocolate rabbits but denied the opportunity to eat them.

Tags: blends(3) christian(8) holidays(8) jewish(6) mashups(12) rabbits(2) religion(11)
Names Mentioned: easter(1) yom kippur(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 465/4674
Added: 02/12/2009


Tooth-whitening Toothpaste

George and Neal hit great fame in the late '80s after successfully marketing a tooth-whitening toothpaste. However, when it was discovered that the "paste" was merely the inside of a Twinkie®, sales plummeted, except in Europe.

Tags: 1980s(7) business ventures(46) europe(4) failures(22) toothpaste(4)
Names Mentioned: twinkies(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 387/4808
Added: 02/12/2009


We Help You Help Yourself - Self Help Clinic

In 2005, George and Neal founded the "We Help You Help Yourself - Self Help Clinic". It is unknown at this time whether the Clinic was a whopping success or an utter failure, as George and Neal never unlocked the doors to the clinic, assuming those w... Read More

Tags: business ventures(46) failures(22)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 602/7094
Added: 02/13/2009


Synchronized Swimming

Remember Karate Kid? Well, George and Neal faced off against each other in a similar competition, except it was not Karate, but rather synchronized swimming. George won, and thanks to Neal's speedo, everyone else lost.


Synchronized Swimming - This cannot end well.

Tags: competition(10) movies(41) neal's fashion sense(21) scantily clad people(15) sports(24)
Names Mentioned: karate kid(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 393/6304
Added: 02/13/2009


We the Bad-Ass Americans

George and Neal went on a vacation/bender in 1776 (again with the time machine). Luckily, though wackiness ensued, nothing was altered in our time-line, except that now the Declaration of Independence says, "We the Bad-Ass Americans", and where the s... Read More


We the Bad-Ass Americans - Screw you, ducks!

Tags: 1776(2) ducks(3) government(16) historic events(18) laws(10) scantily clad people(15) time machine(37)
Names Mentioned: declaration of independence(1) john hancock(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 401/6299
Added: 02/15/2009



In 1984, George starred in the movie "Breakin'!" as Master Shabazz. In 1986, Neal, in an effort to follow in his friend's footsteps, starred in the movie "Breakin'! 2: Electric Boogaloo" as Funkmaster Funky Funk McFunkster. The acting skills exhibite... Read More


Breakin'! - This magazine ain't for the suckas!

Tags: 1984(10) 1986(8) movies(41) nicknames(14) publications(14)
Names Mentioned: breakin'!(1) breakin'! 2: electric boogaloo(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 381/5041
Added: 02/15/2009



When George and Neal were told they could do costume designing for Sean Connery, they jumped at the opportunity. Not because they liked Sean Connery - but rather they were intent on taking their revenge after Sean stole their "Rock Smoothies" idea (l... Read More


Zardoz - Sweet Revenge.

Tags: 1974(6) celebrities(69) revenge(6) scantily clad people(15) smoothies(7) success!(13)
Names Mentioned: scotland(3) sean connery(1) yugoslavia(1) zardoz(8)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 396/12414
Added: 02/17/2009


We talked in haiku, | And then in anagrams, too. | Darned nuts, understand?

For a period of six months, George and Neal spoke only in haiku - followed by another period where they spoke only in anagrams. No one understood a single thing they said. So, it was the same as usual, really.

Tags: amazing abilities(16) languages(11)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 398/3135
Added: 02/18/2009


Science Donations

In 1999, Neal tried to give his body to science. After 30 days, his body was returned as being defective.

Tags: 1999(3) body parts(14) failures(22) neal funk(18) science(28)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 579/6610
Added: 02/18/2009


Robot Enslavement

In 2015, robots took over the world. Not as scary as you'd think. The robots were friendly, personable, and wonderful leaders of the enslaved human race. This robotic takeover had nothing to do with George and Neal. Or did it?

Tags: 2015(9) robots(7)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 302/2443
Added: 02/19/2009


Infecting 1002

In 2010, George and Neal went back in time to 2001 to stop themselves from hang gliding off 7 South Dearborn. Instead of arriving in 2001, they arrived in 1002. They tagged along with a group of colonists, accidentally spreading an epidemic among the... Read More


Infecting 1002 - Cold viruses chasing Vikings... Never before had something so huge come out of Neal's nose. Well, except for that one time when he snotted all over Neptune (you always wondered why it's green right?).

Tags: 1002(1) 2001(8) 2010(16) diseases(9) historic events(18) neal funk(18) people of history(33) vikings(2)
Names Mentioned: 7 south dearborn tower(2) carinthia(1) chicago(14) godzilla(3) greenland(2) otto of worms(1) roman empire(1) tokyo(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 342/9326
Added: 02/22/2009



In 1955, a small village in Transylvania attempted to assassinate George and Neal for inventing Pig Latin. All attempts were unsuccessful, in part because George and Neal scared the townsfolk with smoke, mirrors, and a conveniently placed donkey. The... Read More

Tags: 1955(2) europe(4) languages(11) nicknames(14) phallus(8) vampires(1) xxx(11)
Names Mentioned: dracula(2) john holmes(1) transylvania(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 348/5086
Added: 02/24/2009


Hollywood DermaFleck

In 1967, George and Neal traveled to Hollywood, to start their business, "Skin Flakes of the Stars". They sold exactly what you think. People reacted exactly how you think. Surprisingly, years later they restarted the business but marketed the produc... Read More

Tags: 1967(3) business ventures(46) celebrities(69) smoothies(7)
Names Mentioned: gnc(1) hollywood(3) jiffy lube(1) vitamin world(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 324/8315
Added: 02/26/2009


Basic Instinct

George was the prime candidate for the Sharon Stone role in Basic Instinct. When George passed on the role, due only to the fact that taking the role would conflict with his ongoing protest against poodles (don't ask), Sharon Stone got the part.


Basic Instinct - Oh dear lord.

Tags: celebrities(69) george's fashion sense(13) movies(41)
Names Mentioned: basic instinct(1) sharon stone(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 636/7124
Added: 02/28/2009


George and Neal and the Masters of the Universe

In 1981, after the character Orko appeared in the cartoon He-Man, in a move that confused most of the world, Neal sued the cartoon company for infringement of likeness rights. Neal was inspired by George's successful suit a few years earlier for the ... Read More


George and Neal and the Masters of the Universe - Interestingly, Teela is listed as one of his friends. Is there something you're not telling us?

Tags: 1981(4) action figures(2) lawsuits(13) masters of the universe(2) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: ebay(2) he-man(2) masters of the universe(2) orko(2) skeletor(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 324/5512
Added: 02/28/2009


Kidnapped by Ninjas

In 2009, while writing an update to this profile, Neal was kidnapped by ninjas. (Though, truth be told, Neal took out 58 of the ninjas with his awesome karate skills. He was overpowered by the remaining 342 ninjas). Thus, George set on his 14 day que... Read More


Kidnapped by Ninjas - That cat shouldn't have talked so much trash.

Tags: 2009(21) cats(8) journey(6) kicking ass(16) movies(41) ninjas(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 401/5484
Added: 03/01/2009



In 2015 George and Neal will have finalized all of the details surrounding their friendship. That is, until 2016, when they will have to chronicle all that occurred in 2015.

Tags: 2015(9) 2016(8)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 308/2768
Added: 03/02/2009


George & Neal's Excellent Adventure

In 1988, Bill and Ted went on an excellent adventure. Nothing compared to the exploits of George and Neal, which the movie was based off of. However, like all "based on a true story" movies, certain facts were glossed over or changed. For example, Ne... Read More

Tags: 1988(6) ancient wonders(9) inspirations(19) ipod(2) jaguanst(8) journey(6) movies(41) napoleon(2) people of history(33) time machine(37)
Names Mentioned: apple computer corporation(3) beethoven(1) bill and ted's excellent adventure(2) charlie brown(3) ghengis kahn(1) ipod(2) joan of arc(1) napoleon(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 396/10041
Added: 03/05/2009


Fear Factor Delicacies

In 1998, George convinced Neal to go on Fear Factor, where Neal went on to eat 50 scorpions, 12 worms, and over a hundred bull testicles. Neal later learned in fact that George had merely played a practical joke and he was never on Fear Factor. Neal ... Read More


Fear Factor Delicacies - Why Neal took a liking to these we will never know, but he just couldn't stop downing them like there was no tomorrow.

Tags: 1998(9) food(45) revenge(6) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: fear factor(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 514/8786
Added: 03/07/2009


The DHARMA Initiative

In 1973, Neal and George co-founded the DHARMA initiative (yeah, those Lost guys got the idea from us), in an effort to prevent the pending apocalypse. Also, to make peanut butter that won't stick to the roof of your mouth. Unfortunately, there are t... Read More


The DHARMA Initiative - Famine got lucky this time with a PB&J sandwich. Too bad Pestilence had already handled it and contaminated it with salmonella.

Tags: 1973(2) apocalypse(3) food(45) organizations(15) peanuts(6) recipes(10) they stole our ideas(7) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: lost(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 416/7464
Added: 03/09/2009


Just Another Barbecue

In the summer of 2009, George and Neal had a barbecue. (Hey, not everything is as exciting as time traveling or fighting off townspeople.) Oh yeah, there were hordes of zombies at the barbecue that George and Neal had to battle. Almost forgot about t... Read More


Just Another Barbecue - Still, it wasn't the worst barbecue we've attended...


Mmmm...  Grilled Zombie... - ...we did manage to get some interesting bits to try grilling.

Tags: 2009(21) food(45) kicking ass(16) relaxing(1) zombies(21)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1), Neal (1)
Views: 563/8473
Added: 03/10/2009


Sisters of Endless Guilt

In 1962 George and Neal dressed as nuns and moved into the Sisters of Endless Guilt convent, just for kicks. We lived there for three and a half months before we were discovered. After being sent out of the convent we took our habits to Antarctica to... Read More

Tags: 1962(1) animals(17) antarctica(2) christian(8) costumes(4) crimes & scams(16) george's fashion sense(13) neal's fashion sense(21) religion(11)
Names Mentioned: antarctica(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 345/5673
Added: 03/11/2009


The Prolific Pancake Pileup

Back in 1952, Neal and George invented the pancake. Not that they were trying to invent it, mind you. They just suck at making regular cakes, and that's just what happened. They made a fortune as a result, but lost it all when multiple lawsuits were ... Read More


The Prolific Pancake Pileup - Uncle Buck has a long way to go before he can match these babies. We had traffic stopped for three days while crews cleaned up syrup and butter.

Tags: 1952(3) food(45) inventions(49) lawsuits(13) movies(41) recipes(10)
Names Mentioned: chicago(14) illinois(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 784/7935
Added: 03/12/2009


Darwin Loves Us!

In 10,000 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable thumb. In secret documents, Darwin acknowledged this fact, and renounced his natural selection theory. Confusingly, the Vatican has suppressed this information for generations.


Darwin Loves Us! - He couldn't have been that mad; he gave us a signed copy!

Tags: .10000 bce(1) ancient wonders(9) body parts(14) christian(8) evolution(5) inventions(49) people of history(33) prehistoric(6)
Names Mentioned: charles darwin(2) vatican(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 406/6986
Added: 03/13/2009


Able Archer 83: The Origin

In 1983, George devised a 10-day NATO exercise to simulate World War 3, so that all nations participating could see what would happen in the worst case scenario of war. Unfortunately, Neal forgot to tell the Soviet Union about George's game/simulatio... Read More

Tags: 1983(6) historic events(18) origin(24) wars(4)
Names Mentioned: able archer 83(1) nato(1) soviet union(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 590/4137
Added: 03/14/2009


Who Wants to Be a Hundred-Aire

In 2006, Neal appeared on the television spin off, "Who Wants to Be a Hundred-Aire". Neal did not win the hundred dollars.

Tags: 2006(2) failures(22) games(15) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: who wants to be a millionaire(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 358/3881
Added: 03/15/2009


Clean, Efficient, Traumatizing Feeble Power

In 1998, George decided to traumatize Neal by forcing him to watch Peter Jackson's lesser known muppets-on-drugs movie, Meet the Feebles. Neal has been sitting in a corner, rocking back and forth ever since. On the plus side, George realized he could... Read More


Clean, Efficient, Traumatizing Feeble Power - The Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures Through Time and Space (and Pudding)! is powered by people viewing this still from "Meet the Feebles". Thanks for doing your part to keep our site running.

Tags: 1998(9) celebrities(69) energy(6) inventions(49) meet the feebles(1) mental trauma(8)
Names Mentioned: meet the feebles(1) peter jackson(1) power rangers(1) spice girls(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 446/8965
Added: 03/16/2009



In 1993, George won rave reviews with food critics across the nation (though mostly in southern New Jersey) when he created a tasty new meatloaf. Not to be outdone, Neal created the vegetarian alternative, Broccloaf. It tastes terrible. The Scottish ... Read More

Tags: 1993(1) awards and recognition(12) Food(45) recipes(10)
Names Mentioned: new jersey(1) scotland(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 309/3850
Added: 03/18/2009


Oh God I Shot Momma

In 1949, George starred in the off-Broadway (well, off-off Broadway) play "Oh God I Shot Momma" as the corpse. On a completely different note, that same year Neal was beaten by Albert Einstein at both chess and wrestling - at the same time. That guy ... Read More


Oh God I Shot Momma - This was one dude you didn't want to mess with. He'd pin you so fast that you'd age a little bit more than him.

Tags: 1949(2) einstein(3) games(15) people of history(33) sports(24) theater(8)
Names Mentioned: albert einstein(4) Broadway(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 1139/6707
Added: 03/18/2009


Worst... Enya... Ever...

George was the fifth Beatle. However, due to a problem with the time machine, he had to forsake this role, give up fame and fortune and return to his present time. George tells everyone he meets this fact. In 2000, Neal was the sixth Backstreet Boy. ... Read More

Tags: 2000(7) beatles(3) celebrities(69) music(26) neal's fashion sense(21) scantily clad people(15)
Names Mentioned: backstreet boys(1) beatles(4) enya(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 413/9084
Added: 03/20/2009


Mmmmmmm... George Juice!

For unexplained reasons, George loves to bathe in Worcestershire sauce (which defines as a "savory sauce of vinegar, soy sauce and spices"). In 2004, George bottled and sold the bathsauce under the moniker "George Juice". Its sales are... Read More


Mmmmmmm...  George Juice! - George Juice - It's tragically delicious.At least in theory. We've never actually tried it, but it sells like hotcakes!

Tags: 2004(3) business ventures(46) Food(45) george funk(11) recipes(10)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 439/8582
Added: 03/20/2009


Constitutionally Safe

A 1934 proposed amendment to the Constitution would have prevented George and Neal from having anything to do with interfering in global events again. Luckily George and Neal were able to organize a filibuster and then ear mark the bill with enough j... Read More

Tags: 1934(2) government(16) laws(10)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 294/3178
Added: 03/21/2009



In 1983, George and Neal started the hair-metal/country band "Sorry-for-the-Hyphens". They gained a small cult following as a result of their minor semi-autobiographical hits, including: "This-Restraining-Order-Means-I-Love-You"; "Please-Don't-Throw-... Read More

Tags: 1983(6) hair(12) music(26) our bands(9) theater(8) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: batman(8) law and order(2) robin williams(8) sesame street(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 337/7747
Added: 03/22/2009


Definitely not Vain

In 1988, Neal and Billy Joel started a fire. Billy Joel denies it. In 2000, Carly Simon admitted she wrote "You're so Vain" about her 10-month, steamy love affair with George. Making it even more ironic, George had no idea the song was about him.


Definitely not Vain - Carly and Hotcakes, before the pain...

Tags: 1988(6) 2000(7) celebrities(69) George's Fashion Sense(13) music(26)
Names Mentioned: billy joel(1) carly simon(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 379/7130
Added: 03/23/2009


We're Not Bigfoot

George and Neal are both virile, macho men - so much so that if they did not shave for two days, hair would grow all over their body, making them look "ape-like." Occasionally, they do not shave, but still appear in public. This explains the constant... Read More


We're Not Bigfoot - Later that day Neal shaved and went to dinner at Applebee's. No one suspected a thing.

Tags: amazing abilities(16) animals(17) conspiracy theories(7) george funk(11) hair(12) mythological critters(7) neal's fashion sense(21)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 451/5480
Added: 03/24/2009


It Was A Big Stapler

In 1959, George and Neal did some other awesome stuff, and one thing they are both not very proud of. It involved a tray of ice, a can of motor oil, and an industrial-sized stapler. I don't want to talk about it. Let's move on. Please.

Tags: 1959(1) forget this ever happened(9) stapler(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 574/2374
Added: 03/24/2009


Procrastinat... I'll finish later...

Despite having a time machine, George and Neal are terrible procrastinators. In fact the time travelling makes things even worse because they just skip around due dates.

Tags: procrastination(5) slacking and being lazy are hard work(9) time machine(37)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 308/2699
Added: 03/24/2009


Free TV!

George and Neal can view the entire electromagnetic spectrum, not only visible light. This has many uses and has helped us with our amazing achievements. We are also able to listen to radio and watch TV by directly observing their transmission signal... Read More

Tags: amazing abilities(16) Food(45) science(28) tv shows(49)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 375/6405
Added: 03/25/2009


George Spores

In September 1928, Neal and George decided to attempt to clone themselves so that future generations could benefit from their awesomeness. Neal believed he was on to something when he created "George Spores", which grew from George's feet. In reality... Read More


George Spores - George Spores... Who knew they would be so beneficial. They are rather good looking though.

Tags: 1928(1) diseases(9) george funk(11) historic events(18) Inspirations(19) people of history(33) science(28)
Names Mentioned: alexander flemming(1) university of illinois(5)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 408/7613
Added: 03/25/2009


Viking/English Hostility

On June 8, 793 AD George and Neal orchestrated the first Viking attack on England; the raid on the monastery of Lindisfarne in Northumbria. This was the beginning the Viking Age and nearly 300 years of Viking/English hostility until George and Neal h... Read More

Tags: 1066(1) 793(1) britain(9) historic events(18) people of history(33) vikings(2) wars(4)
Names Mentioned: britain(8) duke william of normandy(1) king harold ii(1) king william i(1) northumbria(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 348/6107
Added: 03/26/2009


Slap-Bracelets: The Origin

In the mid-1990s, in an effort to assist law enforcement, Neal and George created a new lightweight, easy to use handcuff. To the shock and frustration of law enforcement across the nation, these new handcuffs were easily removable. As a result, hund... Read More

Tags: 1990s(4) crimes & scams(16) failures(22) inventions(49) origin(24) success!(13)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 353/5086
Added: 03/26/2009


1964 through 1969

In 1983 Neal and George co-wrote a short story that chronicled their adventures from 1964 through 1969. The story was well received in the literary community and we received several offers to turn the story into full length novels. We approved two au... Read More


1964 through 1969 - So very much happened during those five years.

Tags: 1964(3) 1969(2) 1983(6) inspirations(19) movies(41) publications(14)
Names Mentioned: band of brothers(1) hbo(1) sisterhood of the travelling pants(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 397/6622
Added: 03/28/2009


Feats of Strength!™

In 2000 BCE, Neal and George traveled to the English county of Wiltshire to participate in the yearly Feats of Strength!™. George lifted a cow (using his secret muscle enhancing device created, conveniently enough, by Neal and George years earlier, w... Read More

Tags: .2000 bce(1) 1983(6) amazing abilities(16) ancient wonders(9) body parts(14) britain(9) competition(10) prehistoric(6) sports(24) time machine(37)
Names Mentioned: britain(8) stonehenge(1) wiltshire(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 357/7331
Added: 03/29/2009


Ralph Malph

In 1920, George unfortunately lost millions investing in a ponzi scheme, in which his investments were used to pay earlier investors. In 1979, Neal lost millions investing in a Fonzi scheme, in which his investments were used to pay Ralph Malph. Geor... Read More


Ralph Malph - I'll find you, Malph. Wherever you are.

Tags: 1918(1) 1920(1) 1979(3) celebrities(69) crimes & scams(16) revenge(6) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: fonzi(2) ralph malph(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 346/8099
Added: 04/02/2009


The Neo-Geo Fanclub

In an effort to find a way to accurately predict the weather, Neal and George devised a weather-prediction machine, which was comprised of a series of pulleys and levers connected to highly explosive nitroglycerin. This invention did nothing - except... Read More


The Neo-Geo Fanclub - Above: Hardware entirely unrelated to the Neo-Geo fan club. Well, unless if there is another fan club of the same name which is not devoted entirely to the accomplishments of George and Neal, but rather to celebrate a failed gaming console. In that case, disregard this comment, at least as it relates to that club.

Tags: 1990s(4) 2005(2) failures(22) hair(12) inventions(49) organizations(15) video games(12) weather(7)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 339/6563
Added: 04/03/2009


Religious iDeals

In an effort to avoid paying taxes on his massive fortune, in 1935, Neal established the first truly secular religion, Nealism. Honoring the tenets of this religion involved eating lots of chocolate, sleeping, makin' sweet love down by the fire, and ... Read More

Tags: 1935(1) 1944(1) food(45) government(16) movies(41) religion(11) science(28) tv shows(49) video games(12)
Names Mentioned: blues brothers(1) the simpsons(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 390/9177
Added: 04/05/2009


The Georgeless Bunch

In 1969, George was up for the role as Greg Brady on the show The Brady Bunch. However, George did not get the part due to "accidentally" throwing a football at Maureen McCormick's face after she rejected his awkward advances (well, at least, they we... Read More

Tags: 1969(2) 1970s(3) they stole our ideas(7) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: brady bunch(2) eve plumb(1) greg brady(1) marsha brady(1) maureen mccormick(1) mr. roeper(1) three's company(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 341/5825
Added: 04/07/2009


P & VP

Through a series of mishaps and mistaken identities, for a three-day period in 1943 George and Neal assumed the position of President and Vice President of the United States. Before the mistake was corrected, George and Neal passed a series of laws t... Read More


P & VP - Ah... Couldn't've been any worse than the Bush years.

Tags: 1943(2) 2008(6) george w. bush(5) government(16) holidays(8) laws(10) politics(9)
Names Mentioned: george w. bush(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 283/4449
Added: 04/09/2009


Rudolph: The Origin

In 2009, Neal suffered such a massive case of writer's block that his brain literally tried to leave his body by jumping out of his nose. This escape attempt did not work, as Neal's brain got stuck somewhere in his nasal cavity, causing Neal's nose t... Read More

Tags: 1938(1) 2009(21) body parts(14) holidays(8) inspirations(19) origin(24) people of history(33)
Names Mentioned: robert l. may(1) rudolph the red-nosed reindeer(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 294/7003
Added: 04/12/2009


Sinatra Sluggers

In 1970, Neal and George went back in time to punch Frank Sinatra in the gut. Not because we had anything against Frank Sinatra per se, but rather because as George put it, "hey, we have a time machine, wouldn't that be just awesome to do?" To which ... Read More

Tags: 1970(1) celebrities(69) music(26) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13) revenge(6) time machine(37)
Names Mentioned: frank sinatra(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 1010/7660
Added: 04/15/2009


Lavender, Lavender Everywhere

In 2013, Neal and George totally negated existence as a result of a time paradox created by the two. In 2015, Neal and George totally fixed the problem. But... how could that possibly have happened, if they negated existence? My head hurts. Oh, also,... Read More


Lavender, Lavender Everywhere - Taken in 2014, right in the middle of the period when existence was negated. Yup, the absence of everything is lavender colored.

Tags: 2013(7) 2015(9) discombobulation(4) oops(16) prehistoric(6)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 358/4194
Added: 04/17/2009


iKing George

In 1014, George founded the Kingdom of Northeast Georgia, and became King George I (known affectionately as iKing). Beginning in October of that year iKing George commenced an insane endeavor to name everyone and everything George, or variations ther... Read More


iKing George - Just like the Kingdom of Northeast Georgia.

Tags: 1014(1) 2010(16) discombobulation(4) offspring(13) relationships(6) smurfs(2) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: gargamel(2) lost(2) smurfs(2) so you think you can dance(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 690/6821
Added: 04/22/2009


Beating Unicorns is Totally Tasteless

In 1991, Neal organized a protest against brutality toward unicorns called Beating Unicorns is Totally Tasteless, or B.U.T.T. Decades later, George informed Neal that the unicorns were only mythical and that Neal's protest was essentially imaginary. ... Read More

Tags: 1991(3) animals(17) awards and recognition(12) mythological critters(7) neal funk(18) organizations(15) save the aminals(7)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 917/5897
Added: 04/22/2009


Captain Gooey and The Incredible Taint

For a brief time in 1963, Neal and George became super heroes, using the pseudonym "Captain Gooey" and "The Incredible Taint", respectively. Their foray into costumed adventures was cut short sadly, due to a restraining order (which I am restricted f... Read More

Tags: 1963(2) george funk(11) lawsuits(13) neal funk(18) nicknames(14) super heroes(3) video games(12) xxx(11)
Names Mentioned: activision(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 336/5269
Added: 04/22/2009


Cookin' with Martha and Neal

In 1990, George began producing Martha Stewart's new cooking show, "Cookin' with Martha and Neal". The show ran for two very successful seasons; however, relations between Martha and Neal became strained, resulting in an on-air, climactic and violent... Read More


Cookin' with Martha and Neal - She'd as soon kill you as look at you.

Tags: 1990(3) 2050(1) body parts(14) celebrities(69) oops(16) tv shows(49) xxx(11)
Names Mentioned: martha stewart(9)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 368/12181
Added: 04/22/2009



In 1954, Neal and George worked in Japan assisting scientists with all sorts of experiments. (The boys secretly volunteered because they enjoyed drinking random test tubes of unknown substances in hopes of becoming giddily intoxicated). Unfortunately... Read More


Godzilla - Godzilla is moderately annoyed.


Pep Boys: The Origin - Sadly, this doesn't look all that different than what we normally look like.

Tags: 1954(2) genetics(16) inspirations(19) kicking ass(16) mythological critters(7)
Names Mentioned: godzilla(3) japan(2) pep boys(1) tokyo(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 354/9244
Added: 04/24/2009


After-School Specials

In the mid 1980's, Neal and George were hired by ABC to produce a series of after-school specials. Those of you who grew up in the 80's may remember (and still be traumatized by) their shows, including the safety episode, "Where did my thumb go?: Lit... Read More

Tags: 1980s(7) education(9) george w. bush(5) mental trauma(8) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: abc(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 360/5266
Added: 05/01/2009


1234 PAR-TAY!

In the year 1234 George and Neal threw a year-long party because that's just a really cool number for a year. George and Neal refuse to go to the year 4321, in an effort to avoid being redundant.

Tags: 1234(1) 4321(1) party(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 249/2125
Added: 05/04/2009


It's Not a Jewish eBay

In 2014, Neal and George created the website, "Oybay", the very first auction website devoted entirely to the sale and purchase of Jewish items.


It's Not a Jewish eBay - Eh... You can't beat such a deal!

Tags: 2014(7) business ventures(46) jewish(6) websites(7)
Names Mentioned: ebay(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 439/7802
Added: 05/04/2009


Different Strokes of a Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Given the success of the novel (and soon to be movie) Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (a mashup story combining Jane Austen's classic 1813 novel Pride and Prejudice with elements of modern zombie fiction), Neal and George decided to pen a few of thei... Read More


Different Strokes of a Texas Chainsaw Massacre - Not surprisingly, Ms. Garrett was the mastermind behind it all.

Tags: mashups(12) movies(41) tv shows(49) zombies(21)
Names Mentioned: clifford teh big red dog(1) cujo(8) different strokes(1) jane austen(1) mommy dearest(1) pride and prejudice and zombies(1) texas chainsaw massacre(1) the mummy(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 612/7170
Added: 05/08/2009


Aging gracefully...

Although principles of space-time restrict George and Neal from interacting with their older or younger selves (without proper precautions there is a high risk of imploding the universe - also, doing so causes all baked goods to smell like old cheese... Read More


Aging gracefully... - He'd as soon kill you as look at you.


Aging ungracefully... - Neal at the ripe old age of 40.

Tags: aging(2) mental trauma(8) movies(41) paradox(1) science(28)
Names Mentioned: benjamin button(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 317/5191
Added: 05/11/2009



In 2030, Neal became a monosyllabic, drooling, undead zombie. No one noticed the difference until 2033.

Tags: 2030(3) 2033(1) zombies(21)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 282/1699
Added: 05/12/2009


Neality TV

After the success of the show "The L-Word", Neal and George produced a television show based upon Neal's life. In retrospect, it should have been obvious that a television show called "The N-Word" was destined for failure. The show based on George's ... Read More


Neality TV - Above: an extremely poorly conceived idea.

Tags: lawsuits(13) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: the l-word(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 304/4201
Added: 05/12/2009


Super George Brothers

In 1981, George created a ground-breaking side-scrolling video game, Super George Brothers. The game chronicled George's love of eating weird mushrooms he would find on the ground, running around without a shirt, and his penchant for jumping on turtl... Read More


Super George Brothers - George's macho style was sadly covered in clothes in the Nintendo remake.

Tags: 1981(4) turtles & tortoises(3) video games(12)
Names Mentioned: super mario brothers(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 243/2385
Added: 05/18/2009


Play With George's Balls!

Unfortunately, after George's Basket Ball Company, Play With George's Balls!, experienced significant losses due to lawsuits surrounding his latest game, "Grab George's Nutballs" (in which players were encouraged to fight other players in order to ke... Read More


Divorce Court Hero - Break up marriages for fun and profit!

Tags: 1985(4) 2013(7) business ventures(46) games(15) lawsuits(13) peanuts(6) sports(24) video games(12)
Names Mentioned: guitar hero(1) nintendo(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 408/7204
Added: 05/18/2009


Fun With Genetics

Neal does not like the taste of fish. In 2000, George decided to help out Neal by playing around with genetics to create the first fish that tasted like chicken. Unfortunately, this backfired, and now nearly all chickens found in the Midwest taste li... Read More


Fun With Genetics - Nature just threw up a little in its mouth.


Westminster Freakshow - This is where we jumped the shark, genetically speaking.


Bearpotomus X Ostrephant - No wait. HERE'S where we jumped the shark, genetically speaking.

Tags: 2000(7) cats(8) celebrities(69) genetics(16) mashups(12) oops(16) platypus(4) science(28)
Names Mentioned: rush limbaugh(1) westminster dog show(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 471/9107
Added: 05/27/2009



In an effort to compete with Facebook, during 2011, Neal and George created the newest online community, HeadPeriodical. Seen by most as a cheap rip-off and inferior to FB, the website was largely dismissed. Their advertising campaign, "Because Your ... Read More

Tags: 2011(8) business ventures(46) facebook(10) failures(22) publications(14) websites(7)
Names Mentioned: facebook(9)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 320/5876
Added: 05/27/2009


Dirk Diggler Ain't Got Nothin'

In 1991, Neal and George were beaten up by "Marky Mark" Wahlberg and 1 member of his Funky Bunch (specifically, Hector the Bootie Inspector). After knocking Neal and George unconscious, Marky and Hector took their clothes. On the plus side, Neal's tr... Read More

Tags: 1991(3) celebrities(69) movies(41) music(26) phallus(8)
Names Mentioned: boogie nights(1) dirk diggler(1) hector barros (hector the booty inspector)(1) mark wahlberg (marky mark)(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 364/9125
Added: 06/01/2009


Vatican Idol and Spin-offs

In 2007, hoping to cash in and ride on the success of American Idol, but knowing his limitations (such as poor fashion sense, body odor, warbley singing, weird eyebrows, crooked teeth, mismatched nostrils.... [editor's note: many of Neal's failings h... Read More


Vatican Idol and Spin-offs - So tense... So exciting... Can you stay in your seat?


Britain's Got Teeth Problems - Stereotypes have never seemed so fun!


The Last Accountant Standing - File this... under awesome!

Tags: 2007(2) britain(9) celebrities(69) failures(22) neal funk(18) neal's fashion sense(21) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: amazing race(1) american idol(1) bbc(1) bet(1) britain's got talent(1) fox(2) last comic standing(1) simon cowell(1) so you think you can dance(2) vatican(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 365/14300
Added: 06/02/2009


Marshmonica as Endorsed by John Popper

Dateline, 2058: In an effort to feed as well as entertain the homeless, George and Neal invented the first edible harmonica. Much to George's dismay, the harmonica, comprised of marshmallows, candy canes, and prunes (monikered "Marshmonica") was crit... Read More

Tags: 2058(2) celebrities(69) failures(22) food(45) jaguanst(8) mashups(12) music(26)
Names Mentioned: dateline(2) john popper(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 838/8128
Added: 06/03/2009


Ten Cent Beer Night

On June 4th, 1974 George and Neal organized the first (and last) ever Ten Cent Beer Night at the Cleveland Municipal Stadium. The event was both a raging success and huge failure depending on your point of view. While increasing the attendance three-... Read More

Tags: 1974(6) historic events(18) oops(16) sports(24)
Names Mentioned: cleveland(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 336/3955
Added: 06/05/2009


Starring George & Neal!!!

Wanting to attain fame, but hoping to do so with as little effort as humanly possible, George and Neal went back in time to be recast in Hollywood blockbuster movies and shows. First, Neal "borrowed" Barret Oliver's role in The Neverending Story.... Read More


Starring George & Neal!!! - "Whee! Whee! Wh... Hey, this thing smells like an old foot. Can we stop shooting?"


Whoa! - If Shakespeare were alive, he'd be jealous.


Goodby Ronnie! - This is the reason scientists worked tirelessly to create Tivo.


That 70's Star Wars Show - Neal is the one on the left.


Topher Said "No!" - Topher Grace was less than thrilled at the new direction of the show.


Punky Georgester - With hair of... um... nevermind.


Georgantium - The sexual tension between George and Rhea Perlman was so intense that scientists classified it as a new periodic element ("Georgantium")

Tags: movies(41) star wars(7) time machine(37) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: all in the family(1) andy griffith(1) a-team(3) barret oliver(1) brady bunch(2) cheers(1) fight club(1) gimme a break(1) hollywood(3) joey lawrence(1) neverending story(2) opie taylor(1) punky brewster(1) rhea perlman(1) ron howard(2) star wars(7) that 70s show(1) three's company(2) topher grace(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (7)
Views: 1144/10352
Added: 06/06/2009


2008 Election Campaigns

During the 2008 election season, George and Neal were hired by Barack Obama's marketing team to come up with catchy ditties about the man. After writing "Obama Told Me (You Better Shop Around)," "Obama Told Me There'd Be Day's Like This", and "Obama ... Read More

Tags: 2008(6) celebrities(69) lawsuits(13) music(26) obama(4) politics(9)
Names Mentioned: barack obama(4) katie couric(1) ozzy osbourne(2) sarah palin(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 337/7785
Added: 06/06/2009


Pleasurebots: The Origin

2011: As a result of all of George and Neal's time traveling they were away from home a good portion of the time. In an effort to provide comfort to their wives during these long absences, George and Neal created "Pleasurebots" - robots that could *a... Read More


Pleasurebots: The Origin - The first pleasurebots. We still didn't work out all the kinks, so to speak.


Pleasurebots V.2 - Robo-Neal - Clarissa and her Robo-Neal (Version 2.0).


Pleasurebots V.2 - Robo-George - Julie and her Robo-George (Version 2.0). Gives new meaning to the phrase "chrome dome".

Tags: 2011(8) clarissa(6) inventions(49) julie(5) origin(24) pleasurebot(3) robots(7) time machine(37) wives(15)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (2), Neal (1)
Views: 412/7870
Added: 06/25/2009


Team Ghandi

In 1972, not satisfied with only two teams, Neal and George created Chicago's third major league baseball team, Team Ghandi. Unfortunately, the team never won a single game, as instead of hitting the ball, the players tried to reason with it through ... Read More


Team Ghandi - We requested "G"'s on our jerseys... but it wasn't worth the fight.

Tags: 1972(3) chicago(10) failures(22) people of history(33) sports(24)
Names Mentioned: chicago(14) ghandi(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 350/6461
Added: 06/29/2009


Ice Cream Sandwich: The Origin

In 1931, Neal made the mistake of ordering 10,000 loaves of chocolate wafers. (Okay, it wasn't a mistake - he just liked chocolate. It was a weak moment.) George, on the other hand, ordered hundreds of gallons of ice cream - that wasn't a mistake eit... Read More

Tags: 1931(1) food(45) george funk(11) inventions(49) origin(24)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 324/5362
Added: 07/01/2009


Duels of Toxicity

Beginning in 1777, every 4th of July, George and Neal would get together and throw a party for the most important and powerful American figures. The party would always devolve towards the end to drunken arguments as to who had the more "explosive" *a... Read More

Tags: 1777(1) george funk(11) historic events(18) neal funk(18) party(3) people of history(33) sbd(1) wives(15)
Names Mentioned: aaron burr(1) alexander hamilton(1) america(8)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 252/7556
Added: 07/02/2009


We Didn't Do 'Q'

In 1669 Neal invented the ellipses (...), however his first version was flawed. George suggested adding two more dots so that people would stop confusing it with a period. Now people correctly trail off dreamily when they encounter ellipses instead o... Read More

Tags: 1154(1) 1669(1) inventions(49) languages(11)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 227/4242
Added: 07/07/2009


The Lazy X

In 1987, while working on their little known chromosome research project, George and Neal discovered that the Y chromosome was merely a "lazy X" chromosome. This explains why most men are less productive (and let's face it, hygienic) than women. Of c... Read More


The Lazy X - Above: lazy bastard.

Tags: 1987(7) genetics(16) procrastination(5) science(28) slacking and being lazy are hard work(9)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 283/5197
Added: 07/07/2009


George, Digitally Inserted

In 1997, due to George's deep love of Star Wars, as well as his admiration of George Lucas (less as a result of Lucas's accomplishments and more because of Lucas's awesome first name), George asked to be involved in the Star Wars prequels. However, w... Read More


George, Digitally Inserted - "Luke... the Force.... it's just midi-chlorians..." "That's not true! That's impossible!"


Hayden Christiansen - Axed! - Hayden Christiansen must be rolling over in his... um... big comfy bed, in a huge mansion.


Rosebud! - Despite never having seen Citizen Kane, George was insistent on having a part... He played the snow globe.

Tags: 1997(6) celebrities(69) movies(41) star wars(7)
Names Mentioned: bill cosby(1) citizen kane(1) george lucas(2) hayden christiansen(1) jaws(1) leonard: part 6(1) orson welles(1) star wars(7)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 457/7988
Added: 07/10/2009


Everybody Poops

In 1984, Bantam Books contacted George and Neal, requesting they write and illustrate a book for their Choose Your Own Adventure book line. George and Neal decided to adapt their favorite book, Everybody Poops, as a choose your own adventure book. Un... Read More


Everybody Poops - George and Neal's favorite book. Second favorite? Most People Wipe.

Tags: 1984(10) poop(7) publications(14)
Names Mentioned: bantam books(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 354/7606
Added: 07/23/2009



Emoticons will become the dominant language in 2028 for nearly every nation. In the rare nation that does not adopt Emoticlish (as it is referred to in most nations), the phrase "ESL" will refer to "Emoticons as Second Language". Universal Keyboards ... Read More


Emoticlish - George and Neal's involvement in the emoticlish movement? Creating the first emotikeyboard. It remains a mystery to this day as to why George and Neal felt a need to keep the other "blank" keys.

Tags: 2028(2) emoticons(2) inventions(49) languages(11)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 266/5492
Added: 07/30/2009


George Jaros's Punch Out

In 1987, Nintendo released Mike Tyson's Punch Out. Although it was a smash hit, many believe that the game would have sold significantly better had it been released in its original incarnation, George Jaros's Punch Out.... Read More


George Jaros's Punch Out - "007 373 5963" - this password led you to a world of hurtin', GJ style.


Simon Supplements - Simon Supplements - "Strong. Freakishly, freakishly strong."WARNING: Side effects may include awesomeness. And the complete loss of testicles.


Street Fighter 6 - Neal found that being overpowered by Chun Li was notably arousing. At least to him.

Tags: 1987(7) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13) video games(12)
Names Mentioned: mike tyson(1) nintendo(2) punch out(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 323/5225
Added: 08/08/2009


The Rolling Beatles

So very, very tired of endless "Beatles vs. Stones" arguments, in 2022, George and Neal decided to do the only logical thing to resolve the issue: go back in time and force John and Paul to join forces with Mick and Keith. Thus, the band "The Rolling... Read More


The Rolling Beatles - Finally... satisfaction.


Hammer | Hendrix - What time is it? All Along The Watchtower, the Clock Strikes HAMMERTIME!

Tags: 1968(4) 2022(4) beatles(3) celebrities(69) competition(10) mashups(12) music(26) our bands(9) success!(13)
Names Mentioned: beatles(4) hanson(1) jimmi hendrix(2) john lennon(1) keith richards(1) m c hammer(1) mick jaggar(1) nine inch nails(2) paul mccartney(2) pearl jam(1) prince(4) rolling stones(2) trent reznor(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 316/11907
Added: 08/09/2009


It's All Relative

On April 1, 2010, George thought it would be a hilarious prank to go back in time and seduce Neal's great-grandmother. Consequently, George became Neal's great-grandfather. While George found this unintended consequence hilarious, Neal did not find t... Read More

Tags: 2010(16) celebrities(69) offspring(13) relationships(6)
Names Mentioned: m c escher(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 551/6391
Added: 08/11/2009


Vintage Escher Architecture - For Rent

Speaking of M.C. Escher, in 1955, George and Neal once rented an apartment from him. On the plus side, the rent was very low for such a roomy place. The downside? All the faceless people. Very creepy. Also, the conflicting laws of gravity made going ... Read More


Vintage Escher Architecture - For Rent - Reason #85 why neither George nor Neal will win "Father of the Year": telling their children the bathroom is downstairs.

Tags: 1955(2) art is art(10) celebrities(69) failures(22)
Names Mentioned: m c escher(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 285/9506
Added: 08/11/2009


1945, Tigers/Cubs, Game 4 of the World Series

In 1945, George and Neal decided to go to a Tigers/Cubs game - fatefully, it was Game 4 of the World Series. During the game, George complained of a strange odor. After a few innings, George became so upset by the noxious smell, he complained to P.K.... Read More


Even We Couldn't Help the Cubs - Above: the most handsome baseball team ever. They were known as the "Lovable, handsome, amazingly bodacious losers."

Tags: 1945(2) 2020(5) chicago(10) cubs(2) failures(22) george's fashion sense(13) historic events(18) neal funk(18) neal's fashion sense(21) oops(16) sports(24)
Names Mentioned: billy goat tavern(1) billy sianis(1) chicago(14) chicago cubs(2) detroit tigers(1) p k wrigley(1) the postman(1) waterworld(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 366/14237
Added: 08/15/2009


An end to worldwide tortoise hunger!

In 2008, George and Neal became extremely productive after discovering they could use their time machine to sleep 9 hours each night, while only really "wasting" one hour. They would sleep from 10 p.m. to 11 p.m., wake up, go back in time to 10 p.m.,... Read More


An end to worldwide tortoise hunger! - Another tragedy averted.

Tags: 2008(6) time machine(37) turtles & tortoises(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 296/7667
Added: 08/19/2009


The George and Neal Newsnetwork

In 2040, Neal and George created a television news program devoted solely to chronicling their (mis)adventures, called the George and Neal Newsnetwork (or "GNN"). GNN hit an all-time high Nielsen rating during Neal's cooking show with Martha Stewart ... Read More


The George and Neal Newsnetwork - For all of your news and adult entertainment needs.

Tags: 2040(4) celebrities(69) failures(22) scantily clad people(15) tv shows(49) xxx(11)
Names Mentioned: cnn(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 266/8846
Added: 08/20/2009


Connect One

After "Connect the Dot" the movie broke box office records, George and Neal decided to create a new game upon which to base another movie. The result? Connect One, an instant classic.


Connect One - It's all about strategy.

Tags: games(15) inventions(49) movies(41)
Names Mentioned: connect four(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 1366/5766
Added: 08/20/2009


I Dare You!

On September 6, 2010, George and Neal initiated a series of dares, each more shocking than the last. It started innocently enough, when George dared Neal to eat a live worm (not knowing that Neal had done this for free in the past, on a number of occ... Read More


I Dare You! - Although there were those who thought George was the bride, it was still a beautiful ceremony. George decided to keep the toaster that he received; the newlyweds didn't seem to mind.


Dan Ack-who? - Now George's come-on, "Hey baby, wanna see my proton pack?" makes sense.


Neal vs Cassius Clay - Funny, Neal doesn't remember this at all. (George, on the other hand, remembers it very, very clearly, having profited immensely from all the shirts, DVDs, postcards, "Happy Birthday, Grandma" birthday cards, toilet paper, penile enlargement packs, and other products he sold bearing this image. Thanks George.)

Tags: 2010(16) business ventures(46) celebrities(69) competition(10) food(45) George's Fashion Sense(13) movies(41) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13)
Names Mentioned: cassius clay(1) dan ackroyd(1) ghost busters(1) muhammad ali(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 308/14632
Added: 08/25/2009


Metric Woes

Unable to persuade America to convert to the Metric system, in 2087 George and Neal successfully convinced America to abandon their current measuring system in favor of the "Jarmonorgeal" system. Unfortunately, the Jarmonorgeal system did not allevia... Read More

Tags: 2087(1) failures(22) inventions(49) laws(10) nicknames(14) offspring(13)
Names Mentioned: america(8) louisiana(1) maine(1) thailand(1) washington d c(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 272/6961
Added: 09/02/2009


There's Waldo!!!

In 1998, Neal became overwhelmingly frustrated when he tried to crack the mysteries of the complex literary tome, "Where's Waldo?" After a near-breakdown, George decided to help his friend, as well as the public at large, by publishing "There's Waldo... Read More


There's Waldo!!! - Even so, it took Neal about 35 minutes to find Waldo.


Where in the Morgue is Carmen Sandiego? - Described as "more disturbing than Hostel 2", this game was banned in most language-speaking countries. Despite this, George and Neal have decided to continue working on their next project, "The Magic School Bus: Field Trip to the Abattoir".

Tags: 1998(9) education(9) games(15) languages(11) mental trauma(8) publications(14) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: the magic school bus(1) where in the world is carmen sandiego(1) where's waldo(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 376/9644
Added: 09/04/2009


No Photoshopping Allowed

In 2041, someone had the gall to accuse George and Neal of photoshopping images of their great accomplishments. George and Neal quickly provided hundreds of additional photos in response to the allegation proving that they did not engage in any photo... Read More

Tags: 2041(2) amazing abilities(16) oops(16) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13)
Names Mentioned: adobe photoshop(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 307/4039
Added: 09/05/2009


Hawking's melodious robotic voice... Ahhh....

In 2036, tired of attempting to potty train their many, many children (combined, George and Neal sired 664 children, thanks to their wives, who have been cloned many times over as George and Neal can't seem to get enough of them), George and Neal gat... Read More

Tags: 2036(2) celebrities(69) failures(22) inventions(49) offspring(13) poop(7) science(28) wives(15)
Names Mentioned: red green(1) stephen hawking(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 330/9869
Added: 09/06/2009


New George and New Neal

On April 23, 1985, Coca-Cola changed its formula and released the New Coke. Not to be outdone, George and Neal intentionally altered their DNA to create New George and New Neal. Much like the New Coke, the response was overwhelmingly negative, and th... Read More

Tags: 1985(4) business ventures(46) genetics(16) george funk(11) neal funk(18) recipes(10)
Names Mentioned: britain(8) coca-cola(1) netherlands(1) new coke(2) talossa(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 358/7079
Added: 09/08/2009


Harold and the Purple Crayon: Harold Discovers the Female Anatomy

In 2004, George and Neal publish their educational children's book, "Harold and the Purple Crayon: Harold Discovers the Female Anatomy". The book was a hit, especially in the "Males, ages 13-18" demographic. There was much praise. And lawsuits. Lots ... Read More


Harold and the Purple Crayon: Harold Discovers the Female Anatomy - Above: Mandatory curriculum in President Obama's Education Recovery Effort.

Tags: 2004(3) education(9) lawsuits(13) obama(4) publications(14) success!(13)
Names Mentioned: barack obama(4) harold and the purple crayon(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 864/7284
Added: 09/13/2009


Dr. Mountain Pepper Dew BBQ Sauce

In 2008, Neal convinced the makers of Dr. Pepper (which he claimed was the greatest jaguanst available, at least until the year 3041, when the superior Rottercola came out, which was far, far tastier and 1800% more likely to cause cavities.) to make ... Read More

Tags: 2008(6) 2009(21) 3041(1) business ventures(46) economy(8) food(45) inventions(49) jaguanst(8) mashups(12) recipes(10) that's what she said(6)
Names Mentioned: dr. pepper(2) mountain dew(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 1570/9902
Added: 09/18/2009


Bob, I miss my testicles, you jerk!

In 1988, George and Neal created cats and dogs with opposable thumbs and above-average intellects. Everyone was thrilled with the evolutionary jump - well, everyone except Bob Barker, who received copious amounts of angry letters from the critters. G... Read More

Tags: 1988(6) body parts(14) cats(8) celebrities(69) save the aminals(7)
Names Mentioned: bob barker(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 295/9337
Added: 09/28/2009


Huh huh huh, you said 'deep'...

On May 11, 1997, "Deep Blue", a chess-playing computer developed by IBM, won a six-game match by two wins to one with three draws against world champion Garry Kasparov. George believed he do could much better than Kasparov, and challenged the compute... Read More

Tags: 1997(6) celebrities(69) games(15) kicking ass(16) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13)
Names Mentioned: garry kasparov(1) ibm(1) ultimate fighting championship(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 318/6443
Added: 09/29/2009


The Recession: The Origin

In 2003, becoming increasingly paranoid that officials at the Pentagon were conspiring against him, George W. Bush asked that George and Neal create the Hexagon, a secret governmental branch whose sole purpose was only to monitor the Pentagon. Later,... Read More

Tags: 2003(3) economy(8) george w. bush(5) government(16) origin(24)
Names Mentioned: america(8) george w. bush(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 555/5094
Added: 10/01/2009


On Online Dating

After the success of online dating websites such as "Eharmony" and "J-Date" (a social/dating website for Jewish people), George and Neal created their own dating websites, including: - "Hey-Hey-Hey" Date, the world's largest singles network for those... Read More


On Online Dating - Meat someone with similar tastes as you, or your neighbor, or the neighbor's dog...

Tags: diseases(9) jewish(6) nicknames(14) relationships(6) tv shows(49) websites(7) zombies(21)
Names Mentioned: dwayne clemens nelson(1) eharmony(1) j-date(1) what's happening(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 338/12076
Added: 10/04/2009


Search Engine Search Engine (no, we didn't stutter)

By 2040, the number of internet search engines were so voluminous and staggering (including Infoseek, Lycos, Yahoo, Google, Magellan, AltaVista, Ask Jeeves,, Goodsearch, SearchMe, and 150 million others) that George ... Read More

Tags: 2040(4) business ventures(46) inventions(49) websites(7)
Names Mentioned: altavista(1) ask jeeves(1) goodsearch(1) google(1) infoseek(1) lycos(1) magellan(1) searchme(1) yahoo(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 337/10393
Added: 10/10/2009


People Against Kneeling

In October 2009, Neal was kidnapped by the group, People Against Kneeling (or PAK; male members are known as PAK-Men and those married to PAK-Men may still retain their "Ms." nomenclature). Neal was abducted solely because his name could be construed... Read More

Tags: 2009(21) organizations(15)
Names Mentioned: pac-man(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 305/3855
Added: 11/19/2009


Two Seamstresses, One Thimble

In 1878, Eadweard Muybridge created what was essentially the world's first "motion picture." Later that year, Neal and George created the first viral video, "Two Seamstresses, One Thimble."

Tags: 1878(1) movies(41) people of history(33) scantily clad people(15) thimbles(2) xxx(11)
Names Mentioned: eadweard muybridge(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 550/6006
Added: 11/19/2009


Horton Hears A Gremlin

In the early 2000's, George and Neal were hired by FOX studios to pitch movie ideas. Given their many adventures, you'd think they would have a wealth of ideas for hit movies. As it turns out, they did not. Instead, George and Neal decided to follow ... Read More


Horton Hears A Gremlin - Though the movie holds an 86% on, the novelization is far superior, as it includes emotionally resonant subtext completely absent in the movie.


Aliens versus Peanuts - The kids made fun of Linus constantly, but at least the Great Pumpkin didn't have two sets of teeth and an appetite for human flesh.

Tags: 2000s(2) art is art(10) mashups(12) movies(41) peanuts(6)
Names Mentioned: alien(2) alien vs predator(2) apocalypse now(1) blade runner(1) charlie brown(3) dr. seuss(2) fox(2) gremlins(1) horton hears a who(1) linus(1) neverending story(2) peanuts(1) that was then this is now(1) wizard of oz(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 355/11363
Added: 12/02/2009


Apples freakin' hurt.

After hearing that Isaac Newton once disparaged Neal's great-great-great-great Grandfather's honor, George and Neal went back to 1666, and chucked an apple at his head. Incidentally, this led to the discovery of gravity by the somewhat confused scien... Read More

Tags: 1666(1) inspirations(19) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13) people of history(33) science(28)
Names Mentioned: isaac newton(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 274/6809
Added: 12/10/2009


Couch Potatoes Illustrated

Hearing about the steep decline in readers for magazines such as Sports Illustrated and Men's Health, George and Neal decided to start their own magazine to capture those increasingly less-active readers. In December, 2009, George and Neal started th... Read More

Tags: 2009(21) business ventures(46) failures(22) publications(14) slacking and being lazy are hard work(9)
Names Mentioned: doritos(1) sports illustrated(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 294/4959
Added: 12/10/2009


Restraining Orders Suck

Between 2056 and 2058, George and Neal had little contact, due to a government-sought restraining order. During those years, Awesomeness!™ was outlawed; so, to eliminate as much Awesomeness!™ as possible, George and Neal were ordered to keep away fro... Read More

Tags: .424 bce(1) 2056(2) 2058(2) 2059(3) animals(17) business ventures(46) education(9) food(45) gimme a break(5) government(16) laws(10) mashups(12) music(26) people of history(33) time machine(37)
Names Mentioned: persia(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 348/11348
Added: 01/29/2010


Just don't use it on your clothes, please.

In 2048, Neal claimed to invent an invisibility potion, and thereafter used the potion to open up many financially successful invisible zoos. George later discovered that Neal didn't devise any invisibility potion, but rather created an elaborate and... Read More


Just don't use it on your clothes, please. - Neal relaxes with a delicious invisible Dr. Pepper. (Now with even less calories than Diet Dr. Pepper!)

Tags: 2048(1) business ventures(46) crimes & scams(16) inventions(49) jaguanst(8)
Names Mentioned: dr. pepper(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 273/5395
Added: 08/09/2010


Everything is About George

After a heated debate with his wife where she stated, "Everything is not always about you, George!", George went back in time (just prior to the beginning of that conversation), and invented a ray that temporarily made it so that anything and everyth... Read More

Tags: nicknames(14) people of history(33) time machine(37) wives(15)
Names Mentioned: george takei(1) george washington(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 306/9207
Added: 08/09/2010


The Idiots Guide To Circumcision

In 1995, George and Neal published the first ever "Idiots Guide To..." book under the pseudonyms "Astronauts Thomas D. Jones, Ph.D. and Michael Benson", respectively. Unfortunately, it was only after printing 10,000 copies that they realized there w... Read More


The Idiots Guide To Circumcision - Upon reflection, we probably shouldn't have included a "Tips" section in each chapter.

Tags: jewish(6) nicknames(14) publications(14)
Names Mentioned: complete idiot's guide(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 311/7068
Added: 08/24/2012


Nealocrats and Georgicans

In 2034, as a result of their love of George and Neal, America did away with their bipartisan political landscape, replacing it with a more unified governmental system known as Neorgitarians. But by 2035, the unification was no more - the group had ... Read More


Nealocrats and Georgicans - Above: A Nealocrat attending a somber funeral. Most assuredly, this did not put the "fun" back in "funeral." It did, however, put the "uncomfortable" back in "uncomfortabuneral".

Tags: 2034(2) 2035(2) government(16) politics(9)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 342/3240
Added: 08/25/2012


Nanas & Tiaras

Sickened by the inappropriate nature of the popular show "Toddlers & Tiaras", in 2018 George and Neal created a much more family-friendly rival show, "Nanas & Tiaras".


Nanas & Tiaras - CBS dubbed it their "hottest program of the summer". Unfortunately for the viewing public, it was a very accurate statement.

Tags: 2018(4) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: toddlers & tiaras(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 321/3553
Added: 08/25/2012


Welcome aboard Adin!

In 2012, after being told about many of George and Neal's great exploits, Neal's son Adin asked if he could be a part of their future escapades and adventures. George and Neal were readily willing to include him in their time-travel and general awes... Read More


Welcome aboard Adin! - After seeing this, Marlboro approached Adin to be the sponsor of their kid line of cigarettes. Adin thankfully refused, but liked their pitch of "Sharkboy, the 21st century Cowboy".


My Pet Mrrrggghghh - Mrrrggghghh's gift to the couple, a severed head, was, predictably, not appreciated.

Tags: 2012(14) 2080(1) 3087(1) amazing abilities(16) animals(17) offspring(13) time machine(37) zombies(21)
Names Mentioned: cerberus(1) hercules(1) marlboro(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 332/13162
Added: 08/26/2012


Going all Einstein on your mouth...

In order to celebrate his genius, George and Neal went back in time to 1952 to meet Albert Einstein. Rather than being interested in scientific breakthroughs and new physics concepts of the new millennium, Einstein wished only to learn of our current... Read More


Going all Einstein on your mouth... - According to Einstein, "Ziss vas vorth de infection."

Tags: 1952(3) einstein(3) george's fashion sense(13) inspirations(19) neal's fashion sense(21) science(28)
Names Mentioned: albert einstein(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 385/6131
Added: 08/26/2012


Welcome Back Potter

Overwhelmed by the success of the Harry Potter franchise (books, movies, games, cereals, tampons, etc.) and eager to revive the 1970's sitcoms, in 2009 George and Neal created the show, "Welcome Back Potter." It was an instant success, if you measur... Read More


Welcome Back Potter - Above: promotional photograph for "Harry Potter and the Unruly Sweathogs".

Tags: 1970s(3) 2009(21) mashups(12) movies(41) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: Harry Potter(8) welcome back kotter(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 365/5749
Added: 08/27/2012


Sleep Sleep Revolution

Hoping to get in on the "full body motion" video games made popular by the Wii and XBox Kinect, George and Neal invented "Sleep Sleep Revolution." Sales were sluggish, likely because the target demographic was too lazy to venture out to buy a copy.


Sleep Sleep Revolution - "So warm... So cozy... So inviting.... ARE YOU UP TO THE CHALLENGE???"

Tags: inventions(49) movies(41) video games(12)
Names Mentioned: dance dance revolution(1) xbox kinect(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 315/4730
Added: 08/27/2012


The 3 Stooges: The Origin

In 1933, Columbia's "3 Nice Regular Guys" premiered, starring Moe Howard, Larry Fine, and George Jaros. The three produced 25 eight-to-twelve minute shorts, wherein the three gentlemen treated each other with utmost respect and kindness. Much of th... Read More


The 3 Stooges: The Origin - "The 3 Gentlemen," just moments before George's pain brought happiness to so many.

Tags: 1933(1) celebrities(69) origin(24) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13) people of history(33) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: columbia pictures(1) curly howard(1) jerry horwitz(1) larry fine(1) louis feinberg(1) moe howard(1) moses horwitz(1) three stooges(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 300/11019
Added: 08/28/2012


Chronal Warriors George

With the success of Hasbro's Transformers and G.I. Joe toy lines, rival toy company Tonka sought to create their own action figure toy lines. After achieving limited success with the Gobots, in 1985, Tonka execs approached George and Neal in an effo... Read More


Chronal Warriors George - This limited edition George figure sells for more today than your child's entire college education. Either is just as likely to get your kid a job in this economy.


Chronal Warriors Neal - Tonka's 15th generation toy line included this toy, "Library Attending Neal."


Grabbin' my Neal and George - Still from the CLIO award-winning but unfortunately titled commercial, "Grabbin' my Neal and George".

Tags: 1985(4) action figures(2) business ventures(46) economy(8) nicknames(14) toys(3)
Names Mentioned: clio awards(1) g i joe(1) gobots(1) hasbro(1) tonka(1) transformers(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 411/9296
Added: 09/01/2012


Clint Ain't Wacko!

In August 2012, Clint Eastwood was thought to have embarrassed himself at the Republican National Convention by pretending to argue with an invisible President Obama, when in actuality he was merely talking with an empty chair. Most of the world cut... Read More


Clint Ain't Wacko! - Despite being invisible, Neal frustrated many by continually asking how his hair was.

Tags: 2012(14) celebrities(69) discombobulation(4) neal's fashion sense(21) obama(4) politics(9)
Names Mentioned: barack obama(4) clint eastwood(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 330/16488
Added: 09/09/2012


3014 Was Weird

In 3014, feeling melancholy as a result of a worldwide illness that removed the human eye's ability to detect a significant amount of electromagnetic radiation on the visible spectrum (the R and the G were notably absent, leaving only the B - which a... Read More


3014 Was Weird - Psychological torture was never so much fun!


One Flew Over the...  Mousetrap? - I'm fairly positive they literally just repackaged the game Mouse Trap.


Eeew.... - The directions require you to take at least two showers after playing.


The Game of (Our) Life - The girl on the left is mere moments away from a total mental meltdown.

Tags: 1975(2) 2012(14) 3014(2) celebrities(69) diseases(9) games(15) movies(41)
Names Mentioned: magic mike(1) michael bay(1) one flew over the cuckoo's nest(1) sophie's choice(1) vincent van gogh(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (4)
Views: 363/17761
Added: 09/23/2012


History came alive, boy howdy!

This wasn't the first time that George and Neal had a monumental impact on the mathematical world. In 2012, while bored one weekend, they decided to become experts in astrophysics, physics, and a host of other scientific topics. Along the way, they... Read More

Tags: 2011(8) 2012(14) calendars(4) historic events(18) mathematics(2) science(28)
Names Mentioned: sudan(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 290/11660
Added: 09/24/2012


George Neal

In 2029, George and Neal decided to tinker with building functional teleportation technology. Unfortunately, it had been years since either Neal or George watched the 1986 Jeff Goldblum film, The Fly, which illuminated the dangers of teleportation. ... Read More


George Neal - Voted sexiest man alive, 1821.

Tags: 1700s(1) 1912(1) 1986(8) 2029(2) britain(9) celebrities(69) christian(8) genetics(16) george funk(11) historic events(18) movies(41) neal funk(18) offspring(13) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13) people of history(33) religion(11) teleportation(10) that's what she said(6) time machine(37) wives(15)
Names Mentioned: britain(8) canada(4) george neal(1) jeff goldblum(1) lake erie(1) neil armstrong(1) ontario(1) rev. george neal hazen(1) scotland(3) south carolina(1) the fly(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 600/19494
Added: 09/24/2012


Jaros/Simon 2016 vs Simon/Jaros 2016

Exhausted with the mean-spirited nature of recent presidential elections as well as the inability of presidents to follow through on campaign promises, George and Neal decided to run for president in 2016. Problems quickly arose when the two could no... Read More


Jaros/Simon 2016 vs Simon/Jaros 2016 -


Jaros/Simon 2016 vs Simon/Jaros 2016 - These pins are considered extremely rare and valuable (by the insane).


2016 Presidential and Vice Presidential Debates - Neal's constant mugging was as arousing as it was distracting.

Tags: 1776(2) 1943(2) 2016(8) celebrities(69) competition(10) ducks(3) government(16) laws(10) movies(41) politics(9)
Names Mentioned: air force one(1) harrison ford(1) howard the duck(1) peter j. oberweis(1) ralph nader(1) ross perot(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 398/14268
Added: 10/18/2012


What happens in Ancient Greece stays in Ancient Greece.

Tired of caring for three children (yes, George, that includes you), Julie recruited Clarissa to go on a time traveling "ladies only" vacation. While the women were gone, George and Neal successfully fended for themselves and the kids, subsisting on... Read More


What happens in Ancient Greece stays in Ancient Greece. - This picture was the inspiration for both the 12 hour clock, and erotic cakes. I'm not really sure how that last one relates, but, eh, there you go.

Tags: 2012(14) 3014(2) clarissa(6) food(45) games(15) george funk(11) gimme a break(5) julie(5) neal funk(18) offspring(13) time machine(37) tv shows(49) wives(15) xxx(11)
Names Mentioned: aphrodite(1) cnn(2) greece(2) hera(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 403/22362
Added: 10/20/2012


Where did 'C' go?

Unfortunately, sometimes George and Neal's time (mis)adventures cause unforeseeable consequences. For example, in 1978, the letter/sound "c" was eliminated. As a result, people drove ars, threw things using the atapult and Neal's wife was renamed "... Read More

Tags: 1978(5) languages(11) oops(16)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 303/6838
Added: 10/22/2012


Cow Experimentation

In 1984, during George and Neal's famous Cow Experimentation period (it's not what it sounds like), they successfully bred cows with extremely high intelligence. As a result, George and Neal became strict vegetarians, and hid the nation's beef. Thi... Read More

Tags: 1984(10) chickens(1) food(45) genetics(16) organizations(15) platypus(4) science(28) that's what she said(6) tv shows(49)
Names Mentioned: wendy's(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 1173/8266
Added: 10/22/2012


Luckily for cats, this was a very short period.

During the brief period where George and Neal were not awesome (see, they invented Cat Baseball. It... did not end well.


Luckily for cats, this was a very short period. - Gerbil Football proved much more popular.

Tags: baseball(1) cats(8) cute(2) failures(22) sports(24) websites(7)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 315/7536
Added: 02/11/2013


It Hood Ats Fla Was

In 2014, George decided that he could make a better dictation-to-text program than what was currently available (such as Dragon Dictation and Apple's Siri). Although the program was widely adopted as a result of George and Neal's popularity, it was ... Read More

Tags: 2014(7) failures(22) in good company(6) inventions(49) languages(11)
Names Mentioned: apple computer corporation(3) dragon naturally speaking(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 355/6923
Added: 02/12/2013


Kick-Ball Ball-Kick

Striking a blow for ball rights everywhere (Editor's note: I'm not touching that one - literally or figuratively), in 1973, George and Neal created the first kickball that could kick back. Although the game became much more challenging, it also beca... Read More


Kick-Ball Ball-Kick - (The above image, "Kick-Ball Ball-Kick" courtesy of The Museum of Entirely Random Things, where their motto is, "Come for the pie, stay for the tire-irons.")

Tags: 1973(2) groin kick(3) inventions(49) kickball(1) ouch! that'll leave a mark(13) sports(24)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 372/4772
Added: 02/20/2013


Rhymes with 'Orange'

Upon hearing that no word in the English language rhymed with "orange," in 1986, George invented the word "sporange" just so one would exist. Years later, its definition still remains a mystery (although curiously, three people have thus far been con... Read More

Tags: 1986(8) crimes & scams(16) food(45)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 281/3380
Added: 03/22/2013


Swingin' Records!

In 2016, George and Neal turned their attention to songwriting. They ghost-wrote a string of musical hits, including "We Built This City" by Starship (1985), "Who Let the Dogs Out?" by Baha Boys (2000), and "(You're) Having My Baby" by Paul Anka (19... Read More


Swingin' Records! - Sorry, girls, they're married.

Tags: 1953(1) 1974(6) 1985(4) 2000(7) 2016(8) best album ever(1) celebrities(69) chart topping(4) get aural(2) great music(4) hot tunes(2) lawsuits(13) music(26) our bands(9) party like its 1999(2) record(1) trippy(1) we built this city on rock and roll(3) who let the dogs out(2) you're having my baby(1)
Names Mentioned: Baha Boys(2) jefferson starship(1) paul anka(1) president truman(2) prince(4) starship(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 452/16196
Added: 04/19/2013


Presidential Fight Club

In 1947, Neal convinced Governor Thomas E. Dewey not to run for president, but rather to run as Neal's Vice President. George, hearing of this, was insulted Neal did not ask him to run as Neal's VP. In retaliation, George convinced Harry Truman to ... Read More


Presidential Fight Club - As it should be.


The Jaros Strikes Back - A sad day in American history.


Paradoxes are Fun and Arousing - You have nothing to fear, except Nixon's left fist.


The Darkest Timeline - The Chicago Sun Times had the same title, but the caption read, "Nom nom nom!"  You'd think one of them would be more professional about the whole thing.

Tags: cap'n crunch has nothing to do with this entry(1) governor dewey(1) president truman(1) presidential fight club(1) the dewey show(1) time paradoxes are fun(4)
Names Mentioned: governor dewey(1) president truman(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (4)
Views: 422/6899
Added: 08/23/2013


Role Playing, SFW-style

In 2013, Neal introduced George to the role-playing game, Dungeons and Dragons. George thought it was fantastic, as it blended his love of story telling, games, and sexy goblins. However, both Neal and George found the game's storylines much too v... Read More


Role Playing, SFW-style - The threat is mildly palpable.  And yummy.

Tags: AD&D(1) advanced dungeons and dragons(1) atari(1) attack mace(1) ben & jerry's(1) charisma points(2) d&d(1) e.t.(1) gary gygax(1) miley cyrus is not in this post in any way(8) pauly shore(1) zoos and farm animals(2)
Names Mentioned: e.t.(1) gary gygax(1) pauly shore(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 278/5709
Added: 09/24/2013


The Extreme-est of Makeovers

Tired of trying to do fifteen things at once but failing miserably (well, failing miserably at four, failing happily at six, performing moderately at nine, and skillfully completing three tasks - wait, is my math correct? Uh... I'm not good at non-... Read More


The Extreme-est of Makeovers - Shortly after this photo was taken, George covered the song, "Two Heads Are Better Than One" (from the Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure soundtrack - how's that for obscure?), failing to understand the fairly obvious inappropriate nature of the song.

Tags: chicken nuggets are yummy - that's not really relevant but it's still true(1) extreme makeover(2) reasons julie weeps(2) two heads are only slightly better than one(2)
Names Mentioned: bill s. preston esq.(1) Ted "Theodore" Logan(1) ted 'theodore' logan(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 305/6768
Added: 09/30/2013


The only way to beat a hipster is to become one. Or hit them with a heavy object.

Tired of hipsters telling everyone "I liked that band before they were cool," George and Neal did them one better, going back in time and befriending many rock stars long before they were famous (sometimes immediately after they were born).... Read More


The only way to beat a hipster is to become one.  Or hit them with a heavy object. - George befriends a young Paul McCartney.  This moment later inspired the song, "Here Comes the Son."

Tags: can't take my eyes off of you(1) cool(3) enter sandman(1) good vibrations(2) habitat for inhumanity(1) hipsters(1) rock stars(3) smells like teen spirit(1) when doves cry(1) where have all the flowers gone?(1)
Names Mentioned: brian wilson(2) dave guard(1) frankie valli(1) james hetfield(1) kurt cobain(3) metallica(2) nirvana(2) paul mccartney(2) pink floyd(2) prince(4) roger waters(1) the beach boys(1) the kingston trio(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 307/7697
Added: 10/01/2013


Heavy Petting

In 1975, Gary Dahl became a millionaire virtually overnight when he invented the "pet rock." He marketed it as the perfect pet - one that did not need to be fed, walked, groomed or bathed. Ignoring this selling point and wanting in on the action, G... Read More


Heavy Petting - Doomed.

Tags: cats need food(1) cute(2) dead(1) mood rings(1) Pet Rocks(1) violent mood swing(1)
Names Mentioned: Gary Dahl(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 267/4410
Added: 10/01/2013


Hair Raising Adventure

George and Neal are heavily involved in charity work. For example, during November 1990, they both participated in "No Shave November" (a.k.a. Movember). Wisely, they went from century to century, building a pledge base that spanned hundreds of yea... Read More


Hair Raising Adventure - Facial hair or no, cute kids, amiright?  It was so fortunate to catch the boys together between one of Sam's fishing trips and Mike's takeover of Stark Industries.


 - After growing this, Ayla had an unexplainable desire to tie helpless women up and leave them on train tracks, so that some superhero could save them at the last minute.


 - Since growing this, Adin has been offered four professor positions at well-respected colleges.  Little do most people know, that's all you really need.

Tags: charity(1) kids with beards(1) kids with mustaches(1) movember(1) no shave november(2) november 1990(1) november 2013(1) zz top's favorite charity(1)
Names Mentioned: zz top(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 338/8031
Added: 11/21/2013


It's Magically Disgusting!

On April 12, 2012, the matching game, Candy Crush, was released on Facebook. Less than one year later, Candy Crush became the most popular game on Facebook, with 46 million monthly users. Most people do not realize that this is simply a rip-off of ... Read More


It's Magically Disgusting! - It was no surprise to anyone that a matching game involving an animal's stomach (containing a sheep's heart, liver and lungs, minced with onion, oatmeal, suet, spices, and salt) would be so much fun!


 - All the excitement of a trash compactor, in 8-bit glory!

Tags: $633k per day is proof we are all idiots(1) 1982(5) 2010(16) 2012(14) bejeweled(1) best colecovision game ever(1) candy crush(3) facebook(10) haggis crush(1) i first typed ios app sore and that made me laugh for some reason(1) ios app store(1) orange crush crush(1) rip-offs(3) the simpsons already did it(1) vajazzled(3)
Names Mentioned: bejeweled(1) candy crush(1) coleco(1) colecovision(1) facebook(9) ios store(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 387/15066
Added: 11/30/2013


Happy Chomp-akah

Wanting to "shake things up" for the next Hanukah, in 2013 Neal invented "Tleg", the exact opposite of Gelt - chocolate on the outside, gold foil on the inside. It was as good one would expect.


Happy Chomp-akah - "It's.. deliciously...painful..."

Tags: 2013(7) chanakah(1) chanananananaukah(1) chanukah(1) chanukkah(1) gelt(1) gold tastes bad(1) hanukah(1) hanukkah(1) holidays(8) jewish(6) recipes(10) religion(11) things neal eats(9) tleg(1)
Names Mentioned: adin simon(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 393/5157
Added: 12/05/2013


Those Look Like Comfortable Shoes

In 1937, scientist Daniel Bovet created the first antihistamine to combat allergies. Flash forward forty years later, to 1977 - another allergy-related breakthrough: George and Neal create the Ah-Ah-Shoe!, the first antihistamine-laced shoe which th... Read More

Tags: 1937(2) 1977(2) ah-ah-shoe!(1) american cheese(1) antihistamine shoe(1) biological warfare(2) count your sneezes(1) daniel bovet(1) foot odor(3) stinky feet(3) those look like comfortable shoes(3)
Names Mentioned: daniel bovet(1) kraft(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 874/4762
Added: 12/08/2013


Monkey Back Guarantee!

In 2030, it became extremely fashionable to have a hairy back. To cash in on this trend, George and Neal created a lotion that would increase the hair on your back by 650%. They were so confident that the lotion would work that they offered a "monk... Read More


Monkey Back Guarantee! - If ever we are taken over by ant overlords, we intend to foster a sense of insecurity amongst the ants about their hairlessness - then sell them our lotion.  Boom.  Money.

Tags: 2030(3) ant overlords(1) business ventures(46) fashion(3) george's fashion sense(13) hairy backs(1) lotion(2) monkey back guarantee(1) neal's fashion sense(21)
Names Mentioned: Ant Overlord(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 485/6693
Added: 04/11/2014


Like a Boss

Tired of all the speculation, George went back to 1984 and showed the world who was the boss. It was George.


Like a Boss - Although George successfully replaced Tony Danza, he did so by placing his head on Tony Danza's body.  It was obvious to all that something was wrong -but no one was comfortable talking about it.

Tags: 1984(10) celebrities(69) speculation(4) time machine(37) tv shows(49) who's the boss(1)
Names Mentioned: Alyssa Milano(4) danny pintauro(4) george jaros(13) judith light(4) katherine helmond(4) tony danza(4) who's the boss(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 670/9502
Added: 04/11/2014


Books Change Lives (In Terribly Manipulative Ways)!

In 1957, scientists discovered that children were suffering from extremely low self-esteem. To combat this, George and Neal created an award-winning series of books that sought to increase kids’ self esteem. Unfortunately, this plan backfired as b... Read More


Books Change Lives (In Terribly Manipulative Ways)! - It's nice that Neal got to pass on wisdom his father told him as a child.


 - Pictured Above: Optimism.


 - Pictured Above: Unconditional Love.

Tags: 1957(1) 2032(2) 6142(1) award-winning(1) collapse of civilization(3) daddy's porsche(1) god is mad at you(1) nightmares(2) purchase a cemetery plot(1) self-esteem(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 671/10287
Added: 04/11/2014


Fotomat Selfie

As a result of Instagram’s success in 2010, on April 1, 2010 George and Neal went back to 1980 and changed the names of all the “FotoMats” to “Sometime-Later-Gram’s". No one got the joke for 30 years.... Read More


Fotomat Selfie - Before.


 - After . Guinness World Records found this to be the longest-gestating April Fool's joke ever.

Tags: 1980(4) 2010(16) fotomat(1) guinness world records(1) instagram(1)
Names Mentioned: fotomat(1) guiness world records(1) instagram(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 508/5517
Added: 04/11/2014


Like a Rock

After the hit song “What Does the Fox Say” became the top trending video of 2013, George and Neal released their song, “What Does The Rock Say”. It was 5 minutes of silence. It was a big hit among monks.... Read More


Like a Rock - Though the song sold out arenas...


 - The acoustic show was much more intimate.Regardless, most critics found both shows made no sense.

Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 486/1834
Added: 04/12/2014


Join the Moebius Strip Club

In 2015, tired of hearing all about his father's "great adventures" with George, Adin decided to put a stop to it (and have some fun in the process). At first, he went back in time to 1996, causing George to befriend him instead of Neal. The result... Read More


Join the Moebius Strip Club - Above: 804th Edition (due to constantly shifting timelines).

Tags: 2015(9) adin(1) ayla(1) bette midler(4) bin-opoly(1) creamed corn(2) george(5) georginealogist(1) hollandaise sauce(2) martha stewart(1) masa(1) mike(1) moebius strip(1) nasa(1) neal(4) oybay(1) pudding(2) robot invasion(1) sam(1) tortoise(1) wind beneath my wings(1) yogurt(1)
Names Mentioned: Adin(1) ayla(1) bette midler(5) George(5) martha stewart(9) mike(1) neal(4) sam(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 527/18479
Added: 04/24/2014


No One Out Quotes The Donald

Did you know that George and Neal have written speeches for so many great politicians? Some of their best work includes:“I cannot tell you how grateful I am -- I am filled with humidity.” - Gib Lewis, speaker of the Texas House“It's time for the hum... Read More


No One Out Quotes The Donald - "Do you mind if I sit back a little? Because your breath is very bad." - Not by George and Neal - Much as we'd like to claim credit for this gem, The Donald came up with it all on his own.

Tags: don't let the fame get to your head(1) politics(9) quotes(1) speaches(1) we wrote that(3)
Names Mentioned: Charles de Gaulle(1) dan quayle(1) donald trump(10) gib lewis(1) jacques le blanc(1) nguyen co thatch(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: George (1)
Views: 253/2609
Added: 12/31/2015


Present Cookies. Which could also be given as presents. So, a double win.

In 1918, David Jung (arguably) invented the fortune cookie. Given its immense popularity, George and Neal created a cookie that told you your present. With messages such as “You just ate some food”, “You have just paid your bill” and “this cookie w... Read More


Present Cookies.  Which could also be given as presents.  So, a double win. - Eerily true.


 - Also true.

Tags: clairvoyant(1) cookie(2) cookies(2) david jung(1) disappointing(1) fortune(1) present(1)
Names Mentioned: David Jung(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 313/1871
Added: 01/03/2016


Mmmm.... Gluten...

In 2010, George and Neal created a line of delicious, gluten-free food for those with gluten sensitivities. The food line was a gigantic hit for hundreds of years. As a result, however, George and Neal amassed large stockpiles of gluten which they ... Read More


Mmmm....  Gluten... - Apparently, Nambia’s standards for gluten production is world-class.

Tags: 2010(16) 2347(1) celiac disease(1) diet(1) gluten(1) gluten-free(1) gross(1) sensitivities(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 240/4758
Added: 01/04/2016


World's First Selfie

It was widely thought that Robert Cornelius took the very first self-portrait (or "selfie") in 1839. However, the truth is, not surprisingly, much more complicated than that. When Robert's friend, Herman "Twitchy" Aaron saw the selfie, he became in... Read More


World's First Selfie - A handsome gentleman.  Twitchy was also not hard on the eyes.


 - For some reason, George thought it was appropriate to wear a snake that day.

Tags: 1838(1) 1839(1) Herman Aaron(1) Robert Cornelius(1) selfie(2) time machine(37) time travel(3) twitchy(1)
Names Mentioned: Herman "Twitchy" Aaron(1) Robert Cornelius(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 319/2025
Added: 05/28/2016


It Stinks!

Thanks to the success of nasty food television shows such as Hell's Kitchen, Kitchen Nightmares, and Worst Cooks in America, by 2019 there were no food critics willing to give any positive reviews to restaurants. Every review contained only scathing... Read More

Tags: 2019(4) critic(1) criticism(1) food(45) food critic(1) food poisoning(3) hell's kitchen(1) israeli food(2) kitchen nightmares(1) oscar's stench hut(1) restaurant(1) restaurant critic(1) review(1) worst cooks in america(1)
Names Mentioned: M.C. Hammer(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 214/3033
Added: 07/09/2016


Pokemon STOP

In 2016, the phone app Pokemon:GO! was extremely popular. Kids, adults, and chimpanzees capable of stealing iPhones were all playing this highly addictive game, involving searching real-world locations to "capture" Pokemon characters.What people don... Read More


Pokemon STOP - Why George donned weird outfits and made "rawr rawr" kitten noises as players walked by... no one quite figured that one out.


 - Yep, there's nothing sacred about this. (Also, you can't unsee things like this.  That is why the internet must be stopped.)

Tags: 2016(8) annoying fads(2) charzard(1) clem(3) georgizard(1) highest score(1) phone apps(1) pikachu(1) pokemon(1) pokemon:go(1)
Names Mentioned: charzard(1) george jaros(13) Neal Simon(9) pikachu(1) pokemon(1) pokemon:go(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 246/3768
Added: 07/20/2016


The Guide to Everything

It surely goes without saying that, for thousands of years, George and Neal had an enormous impact on pop culture. They affected everything from television shows to movies, music to currency (especially during 2037-2062 where they convinced the worl... Read More


The Guide to Everything - Fun Fact: before being beamed directly into your skull (whether you wanted it or not), TV Guide use to be printed on an ancient material known as “paper.

Tags: ABC(15) ABC Audience(15) American Idol(15) Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader(15) Bravo(10) Carmen Sandiego(15) CBS(15) Clifford(15) Clones(13) Connect the Dots(15) Cujo(15) Deadwood(15) Different Strokes(15) Discovery(14) E(3) Food(45) FOX(15) Golf(13) HBO(13) History(13) How I Met Your Mother(15) Last Man Standing(15) Learning(14) Lifetime(11) Meet the Press(15) MTV(15) NBC(15) QVC(11) So You Think You Can Dance(15) SYFY(11) TBS(10) Texas Chainsaw Massacre(15) Three Stooges(15) TruTV(11) TV Guide(15) Weather Channel(11) Welcome Back Kotter(15) WGN(12) Zombies(21)
Names Mentioned: and Sometimes Shemp(7) Barat(7) Batman(8) Captain Kirk(7) Carmen Sandiego(7) Clifford(7) Cujo(8) Curly(7) Donald Trump(10) Dr. Who(7) George Jaros(13) Guarandukht(7) Harry Potter(8) Ken Burns(7) Larry(7) Martha Stewart(9) Moe(7) Neal Simon(9) Regis Philbin(7) Robin Williams(8) Scott Baio(8) William Shatner(8) Zardoz(8)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 293/11995
Added: 08/08/2016



In 4020, George's clone wrote a biography about George's exciting, almost unbelievable life; however, since it was his life too, the clone technically composed the world's first "bio-autobiography". Interestingly, "Original George" (who unfortunatel... Read More

Tags: 4020(1) autobiography(1) bio-autobiography(1) biography(1) clone(1) lawsuit(1) o.g.(1)
Names Mentioned: george(5)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 200/1465
Added: 09/21/2016


Presidential Passion!

Originally, Mel Gibson won the 2016 election. Thanks to George and Neal's time machine, this was averted. Unfortunately, Mel Gibson also had a time machine (which explains why many of his movies are so historically accurate), and he used it to once... Read More


Presidential Passion! - "This," purred Hillary, "gives a whole new meaning to 'Hot off the Press.'"


 - Republicans and Democrats finally agreed on one thing - this probably wasn't the best book to read to children.

Tags: 2016(8) braaaains(1) donald trump(1) election(1) hillary clinton(1) inanimate hat(1) lindsey lohan(1) megatron(1) mel gibson(1) richard nixon(2) torrid romance(1) transformers(1) zombies(21)
Names Mentioned: donald trump(10) hillary clinton(1) lindsey lohan(2) megatron(1) mel gibson(1) richard nixon(2) transformers(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Views: 341/4889
Added: 01/25/2017


Settling The Great Debate

In an attempt to settle the long-running debate whether human behavior is determined by a person’s genes or rather by their environment, George and Neal traveled to 1990 and created the rap/ska musical group Naughty b... Read More


Settling The Great Debate - So naughty that Santa won't even bother checking his list even once for these guys.  (Also, snakes and babies were apparently status symbols of some sort back in 1990.)


 - A new debate arose, with some arguing the muffins were tastier than 2Pac's tea cakes.

Tags: 1990(3) 2pac(2) androids(1) banana nut muffins(2) dj kay gee(1) hip hop hooray(1) human behavior(1) muffins(2) nature versus nurture(1) naughty by nature(1) naughty by nurture(1) o.p.p.(1) old school rap(1) rap(1) rap/ska(1) ska(1) tea cakes(2) treach(1) vin rock(1) zombies(21)
Names Mentioned: 2pac(2) dj kay gee(1) george(5) naughty by nature(1) neal(4) treach(1) vin rock(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 244/4395
Added: 08/06/2017


A Worthy Cause!

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, a story about a child born as an old man who aged in reverse, wasn’t always a work of fiction. Originally, there were multiple cases of children born as old people who then aged in reverse. In 2068, George and N... Read More


A Worthy Cause! - Above: Numerous seven-year-old sufferers of B.B. Disease participating in the 9th annual Walk for the Cure”


 - Above: Severe cases, unable to walk, participate in “Sleep for the Cure”

Tags: 2068(3) benjamin button(1) disease(1) fiction(1) the curious case of benjamin button(1)
Names Mentioned: benjamin button(2) f. scott fitszgerald(1) george(5) Neal(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 361/2161
Added: 08/07/2017



On April 1, 2023, Neal was constantly repeating everything that George said. It was later discovered that as a practical joke George used the time traveling machine to go back in time to learn what Neal was about to say, then said it moments before N... Read More

Tags: A Confederacy of Dunces(2) April Fools(2) emile bronte(2) John Kennedy Toole(2) oscar wilde(2) The Picture of Dorian Gray(2) wuthering heights(2)
Names Mentioned: A Confederacy of Dunces(2) Emile Bronte(2) john kennedy toole(2) Oscar Wilde(2) the picture of dorian gray(2) Wuthering Heights(2)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Views: 326/2351
Added: 08/09/2017


I Like My Cartoon Men Like I Like My Fish, Round and Pudgy

During 2003, while involved in their historic "Dare Ya..." competitions, Neal said, "George, I dare ya to create a real life Ziggy," (the adorable, nonthreatening newspaper comic strip character). Neal was deeply satisfied with this dare, as he knew... Read More


I Like My Cartoon Men Like I Like My Fish, Round and Pudgy - That... is a strong likeness.

Tags: 2003(3) blobfish(1) dare ya(1) science(28) ziggy(1)
Names Mentioned: Ziggy(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 418/2025
Added: 09/11/2017


Now THAT's a Timeline!

For many years, the makers of the card game Timeline sought to create a “George and Neal”-centric game. However, given the convoluted and ever-changing history affected by the duo’s chronal exploits, it made creating the game impossible. It was onl... Read More


Now THAT's a Timeline! - The game is probably too easy... I mean, who doesn’t know when George Juice was developed, relative to when those extremely attractive Pleasurebots were created?


 - Copyrights are meaningless against time-traveling grudge-holders.

Tags: card game(1) eyebrows(1) giraffes(1) gorillas(1) love bots(1) pleasurebots(1) punch out(1) spores(1) timeline(1) timeline card game(1)
Names Mentioned: card game(1) eyebrows(1) giraffes(1) gorillas(1) love bots(1) pleasurebots(1) punch out(2) spores(1) timeline(1) timeline card game(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 312/2421
Added: 10/02/2018


Happy 10th - no wait - 1020th anniversary!

February 2019 marks the 10th anniversary of the Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures Through Time and Space (and Pudding)! ....well, February 2019 did originally. Then George took the chronicles to 1009 a.d., to let the masses enjoy such a g... Read More

Tags: 1009 a.d.(1) 2019(4) 75 B.C.(1) Anniversary(1) February(1)
Names Mentioned: george jaros(13) Neal Simon(9)
Entry Logged By: Neal
Views: 386/1281
Added: 01/14/2019


George and Neal: Confession Time

George and Neal have constantly manipulated reality through their countless (well, really infinite, if you consider the multiverse versions of George and Neal) time traveling. Their efforts have benefited the universe over and over. For example, ma... Read More


George and Neal: Confession Time - On the reverse side of the coin: "C is for Currency, and that's good enough for me!"

Tags: Beaker(1) big bird(1) cookie monster(1) currency(1) kermit(1) miss piggy(1) money(1) muppets(1) sesame street(1)
Names Mentioned: Beaker(1) big bird(1) cookie monster(1) currency(1) kermit(1) miss piggy(1) money(1) muppets(1) sesame street(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Other (1)
Views: 1151/11308
Added: 03/06/2019


We Got (no) Game!

Athletes. They command respect, admiration, and free Wheaties cereal. Having conquered every other field imaginable (and then creating fields not yet imagined and conquering those) George and Neal's traveled to 1990 to become world-renowned athlete... Read More


We Got (no) Game! - Michael Jordan listed this as his favorite moment in sports history, even above his multiple championships.


 - "Wait... wait...  wait... I can do this!" George said repeatedly.  He remained in this position for seventeen hours.


 - "Where do I grab?  WHERE DO I GRAB???" Ayla said, before being spun around like a human pizza.

Tags: 1990(3) dodge ball(1) dodgeball(1) embarrassing(1) Michael Jordan(1) sports(24) trading cards(1) you reading these George?(1)
Names Mentioned: george(5) Michael Jordan(1) Neal(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (4)
Views: 1223/1574
Added: 02/08/2021


Down With The Sickness

When the 2020 COVID pandemic hit, it crippled many industries. In hopes of giving a little back - as well as propping up the critically important Broadway play financial sector, George wrote, produced, and acted in the pandemic-themed "Socially Dist... Read More


Down With The Sickness - Ironically, wearing this mask made the actor very, very sick.  The rest of the cast didn't miss a beat, pretended this was part of the show, and the play went on.

Tags: 2020(5) coronavirus(2) covid(1) from here to eternity(1) jesus christ superstar(1) kiss me kate(1) oliver(1) west side story(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (2)
Views: 1371/1842
Added: 02/10/2021

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