The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!

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In 2015, tired of hearing all about his father's "great adventures" with George, Adin decided to put a stop to it (and have some fun in the process). At first, he went back in time to 1996, causing George to befriend him instead of Neal. The resulting time shift caused "The Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!" to become "The Tremendous Story of George and Adin's Adventures Through Chronology and Cosmos (and Yogurt)!" You may remember this period (but probably don't), in which Adin and George created Bin-opoly, established Oybay, and Adin created the TV show, "The A-Word" (which fared only slightly better than Neal's show). In this timeline, Bette Midler showed little interest in George and Adin for some reason, causing most Georginealogists to believe her obsession was primarily with Neal. (Perhaps it was due to Neal's jaw-droppingly, achingly gorgeous rendition of Wind Beneath My Wings, often performed in a chicken suit, which for some reason did not detract from the performance. But I digress...)

Shortly after Adin "revised" the timeline (though shortly is relative; this timeline existed for thousands of years, looped back in on itself like a Moebius strip in 8034, and replayed itself twice more, until moments after Adin "revised" the timeline the third time), Sam, tired of hearing all about his father's "great adventures" with Adin, went back in time to 1996, causing Adin to befriend him instead of George. The resulting time shift caused "The Tremendous Story of George and Adin's Adventures Through Chronology and Cosmos (and Yogurt)!" to become "The Explosive Tale of Sam and Adin's Adventures Through The Chronosphere and Atmosphere (and Creamed Corn)!" This timeline saw such amazing events as Sam besting Martha Stewart in hand-to-hand combat, Adin and Sam ending worldwide tortoise hunger (meaning, they fed all the tortoises to hungry people), and fending off the 2054 robot invasion that Neal and George failed to prevent in previous timelines. It also saw Ayla and Mike refusing to let their siblings have all the fun. Many found "The Fantastic Account of Adin, Mike, Ayla, and Sam's Escapades Through The Eras and the Infinite (and Hollandaise Sauce)!" to be the golden age of all the timelines. [Editor's note: in this timeline, George Neal did not exist; however unlike other timelines, MASA replaced NASA in this timeline. It was not a space program but rather a cute bed and breakfast with the initials of all four children. Which they then turned into a rocket.]

 

On a visit to 1932 George and Neal met with Alex Raymond and related some of this Saga. Alex was inspired and two years later created Flash Gordon, a fairly accurate retelling of some of our adventures. Though the personalities are different, Raymond honored George and Neal by using their likenesses as the characters Ming the Merciless and Dr. Hans Zarkov respectively. In an unusual turn of events, George went on to portray Ming the Merciless in the 1934 serials, 1970s television show, the 2026 movie trilogy, the 2028 movie series reboot, and the 2034 100th anniversary live action extravaganza world tour.

 

In 2121 Neal was stranded in the middle of the Pacific Ocean on a desert island. However, Neal couldn't spell and thought he was on a dessert island. He spent the next year and a half eating nothing but sand, bark, and the occasional wandering crab, which he thought were cake crumbs, chocolate, and gummy crabs respectively. Somehow he survived, however this really did a number on his teeth, inspiring him to write the hit song "Teeth are for Wussies, so Give Edentulous a Chance". Ironically, George was also stranded in the middle of the ocean during the exact same time frame, but he was actually on a dessert island. He survived the 18 months on a diet of whipped cream, lollipops, and chocolate chip cookies. This inspired George to create the recipe for his tooth-whitening toothpaste. Also, ironically, George and Neal's islands were within swimming distance of each other, however Neal was too afraid of the salt in the ocean to swim over. (Well, according to George. According to Neal it was because George kept him away by brandishing licorice whips, but who are you gonna believe?) When George and Neal finally were rescued by some guy named Clem, they returned to the 1980's and put their latest creations to good use.

 

Jealous that the fictitious time travelers, Bill and Ted, got to meet and bring historical figures to their timelines, George and Neal decided to one-up them. They created an entire high school, populating the student body with hundreds of "borrowed" historical figures, both past and future. As one could imagine, the high school dominated many categories of competition, such as debate (the Socrates / Mr. T team cleaning up at every conference, typically employing "the only true wisdom is knowing you know nothing, fool!") and drama (Shakespeare's reboot, The Taming of the Shrek was surprisingly transcendent). However, Neal's lack of knowledge all things sports did hinder the school, as having famous painters Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo and Raphael on the football team did not play out nearly as well as he thought it would.

It was a crazy four years. George was voted "most likely to continue to be a guy named George." It was the highest honor he had ever received.

 

George has always had a love of science fiction. Something about the amazing stories with their roots in real science, fantasy, futurism, and history has always fascinated and inspired him. He also finds it funny how many things that the public believes to be "fiction" he knows to be "non-fiction" (or more precisely, "biography" and occasionally "autobiography").

Neal has always had a love of tapirs. Something about their long snouts, funny ears, and poor depth perception has always fascinated and inspired him. He also finds it funny... That's it, he just finds tapirs to be pretty funny.

In late 1979 George and Neal had the rare opportunity to combine these loves. Some young chump (also named George) was working on the sequel to an idea he "borrowed" from George and Neal. His spaghetti western and martial arts fusion movie set in space needed a bounty hunter, or more specifically the bounty hunter needed a space ship. Since he had never been to space, the other George approached George and Neal for more help. George (this George, not the other George) had an amazing idea for a stealth ship that would allow the bounty hunter to approach his targets undetected. Neal wanted a flying tapir. And thus, Boba Fett's SLAVE 1 ship was designed. Fast forward 40ish years and thanks to more movies, animated serieses, and the hit show The Mandelorian, it is now one of the most recognizable flying tapir heads in history!

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