The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!

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Entries From Thursday, December 31, 2015

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2 Entries on This Page

 

On April 25, 2014 Bette Midler was finally successful in her dastardly plot to capture Neal and George. Using a baked lasagna she was able to lure them into her trap (truthfully they suspected a trap all along, but thought it was for Garfield and wanted that lasagna before the fat cat arrived). For over 20 months the fearless explorers were trapped in stasis pods and subjected to Midler's mind probes. Finally, on December 31, 2015 George and Neal were heroically rescued by their future selves (from all the way on January 1, 2016). And once again, all was right in the world. Celebration and parties ensued throughout the galaxy until the stroke of midnight (Central Standard Time) when George and Neal actually became their future selves and had to leave the party early to go rescue themselves. I'd explain further, but it just gets more confusing. Hey look, a lasagna!

 

Did you know that George and Neal have written speeches for so many great politicians? Some of their best work includes:

“I cannot tell you how grateful I am -- I am filled with humidity.” - Gib Lewis, speaker of the Texas House

“It's time for the human race to enter the solar system!” - Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President on the concept of a manned mission to Mars

“We are not without accomplishment. We have managed to distribute poverty equally.” - Nguyen Co Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister

“I do not like this word "bomb." It is not a bomb. It is a device that is exploding.” - Jacques le Blanc, French ambassador on nuclear weapons.

“China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese.” - Charles de Gaulle, former French President

Neal and George considered writing speeches for Donald Trump, but realized they could not improve upon them.

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