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Vatican Idol and Spin-offs

Entry Logged on: June 02, 2009 to Part 2 by: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)
Page Views: 195 - Times Displayed: 9517

In 2007, hoping to cash in and ride on the success of American Idol, but knowing his limitations (such as poor fashion sense, body odor, warbley singing, weird eyebrows, crooked teeth, mismatched nostrils.... [editor's note: many of Neal's failings have been deleted to preserve Facebook's memory/storage]), Neal prompted George to create Vatican Idol, which he would then try out for. As Vatican City is the smallest country in the world by both area and population (pop: 900), Neal was sure to win the title. Or so he thought. Voted "Vatican City's 900th best singer," Neal suffered through the worst of Simon Cowell's caustic remarks, including: "I have seen more talent contained in the bowels of a seven-day-deceased rodent," "I would rather listen to spider-monkeys mating than hear another second of you singing", and "Despite the fact that all you did was sing, I can unequivocally say that you are the worst human being ever to exist on the face of the planet." Ouch. Neal then set his sights on performing in So You Think You Can Dance?. That, too, went poorly. Hopefully he will fare better on George's newest show, So You Think You Can Sit?.

 

Vatican Idol and Spin-offs - So tense... So exciting... Can you stay in your seat?

So tense... So exciting... Can you stay in your seat?

Photo by: Neal

George, on the other hand, began producing hit after hit in the reality programming world, including: The Amazing Standing In Place, Britain's Got Teeth Problems, and The Last Accountant Standing.

 

Britain's Got Teeth Problems - Stereotypes have never seemed so fun!

Stereotypes have never seemed so fun!

Photo by: Neal

 

The Last Accountant Standing - File this... under awesome!

File this... under awesome!

Photo by: Neal

Tags: 2007(2) britain(9) celebrities(69) failures(22) neal funk(18) neal's fashion sense(20) tv shows(48)
Names Mentioned: amazing race(1) american idol(1) bbc(1) bet(1) britain's got talent(1) fox(2) last comic standing(1) simon cowell(1) so you think you can dance(2) vatican(3)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)

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Tags & Related Posts:

People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: amazing race(1), american idol(1), bbc(1), bet(1), britain's got talent(1), fox(2), last comic standing(1), simon cowell(1), so you think you can dance(2), vatican(3)

Tags:
  • 2007 - (1 Other Entry)
    • Hair, Inc. - In 1964 George and Neal started their niche business "Hair, Inc." in which they supplied the hair for your favorite rock stars and other celebrities. ...
  • britain - (8 Other Entries)
    • The Flying Porcupine (and not the Short S.25 Sunderland) - In 1921 George and Neal began the daunting task of teaching porcupines to fly. It was long, arduous, painful work, and after twelve long years they g...
    • Save the Dinosaurs - 65 million years ago George and Neal used their teleportation device to rescue countless dinosaurs from impending doom when a comet was about to crash...
    • George Neal - In 2029, George and Neal decided to tinker with building functional teleportation technology. Unfortunately, it had been years since either Neal or G...
    • The Great Smog of '52 - In 1952 (but chronologically in 1997 during a trip in a time machine they co-invented) George and Neal visited London, resulting in the Great Smog of ...
    • Ultra-Mega Teeth Brushing and Cleaning System - In 1758 George and Neal invented tooth paste. Their first attempt was made from actual ground up teeth and was used to hold in dentures, but eventuall...
    • Show All...
  • celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
    • That Bastard Chuck Norris - In 2077 George and Neal revolutionized the mathematical world when they discovered a method of dividing by zero. Yes, Chuck Norris did it first, but ...
    • Couch Vibrations with Brian Wilson - As long as we're on the topic of classic rock music groups, it should be noted that George, Neal, and Brian Wilson were founding members of the Beach ...
    • Hungry Eyes - In 1987, Neal organized a one-man a protest against Dial Corporation, demanding that they move their headquarters back to Chicago. Neal's rage was ini...
    • Basic Instinct - George was the prime candidate for the Sharon Stone role in Basic Instinct. When George passed on the role, due only to the fact that taking the role ...
    • Cookin' with Martha and Neal - In 1990, George began producing Martha Stewart's new cooking show, "Cookin' with Martha and Neal". The show ran for two very successful seasons; howev...
    • Show All...
  • failures - (21 Other Entries)
    • Tooth-whitening Toothpaste - George and Neal hit great fame in the late '80s after successfully marketing a tooth-whitening toothpaste. However, when it was discovered that the "p...
    • The George and Neal Newsnetwork - In 2040, Neal and George created a television news program devoted solely to chronicling their (mis)adventures, called the George and Neal Newsnetwork...
    • The Neo-Geo Fanclub - In an effort to find a way to accurately predict the weather, Neal and George devised a weather-prediction machine, which was comprised of a series of...
    • HeadPeriodical - In an effort to compete with Facebook, during 2011, Neal and George created the newest online community, HeadPeriodical. Seen by most as a cheap rip-o...
    • Get $245 Free (maybe) - In 1989 George and Neal were instrumental in the launch of the new chocolate DOVE Promises. Each wrapper featured an inspirational promise. Unfortunat...
    • Show All...
  • neal funk - (17 Other Entries)
    • Lava Lamps: The Origin - In 1960 Neal invented the precursor to the lava lamp, affectionately called the 'Squeegee Glow Blob Light'. However in 1963 British accountant Edward...
    • The Cure! - In 2018 George and Neal discovered a cure for the common cold. Well, not really discovered, but just stumbled upon. Well, not really stumbled upon, mo...
    • Beating Unicorns is Totally Tasteless - In 1991, Neal organized a protest against brutality toward unicorns called Beating Unicorns is Totally Tasteless, or B.U.T.T. Decades later, George in...
    • 1945, Tigers/Cubs, Game 4 of the World Series - In 1945, George and Neal decided to go to a Tigers/Cubs game - fatefully, it was Game 4 of the World Series. During the game, George complained of a s...
    • Going All Digital, and Clean(ish) - On February 9, 2009 by federal mandate George and Neal were required to go all digital. The mandate was immediately revoked and a new mandate required...
    • Show All...
  • neal's fashion sense - (19 Other Entries)
    • Under Siege - In 1992 George and Neal starred in the blockbuster action hit "Under Siege". George starred as the ex-Navy SEAL turned cook who must protect an aircra...
    • Don Cherry's Wardrobe: The Origin - George and Neal are in charge or Don Cherry's wardrobe.
    • Olympic Snowball - In 2022, at George and Neal's insistence (ok, it was actually persistence - we agreed to finally stop whining about it if the IOC included it - we can...
    • Vun (ah ah ah) Too (ah ah ah) Tree (ah ah ah)... - George was originally cast in the lead role as Michael Knight for the 1980's TV series Knight Rider, however due to conflicting interests (George was ...
    • The Fashionably Endangered Rosea Zebra - In the 1980s George and Neal discovered the rare Rosea Zebra, or Pink Zebra. These zebras are native to just a very small part of Africa and their di...
    • Show All...
  • tv shows - (47 Other Entries)
    • They're all True Stories - Numerous TV shows and Movies (and also a few books) have been based on the life and times of George and Neal. Included in these are: Superman, Bill an...
    • Sorry-for-the-Hyphens - In 1983, George and Neal started the hair-metal/country band "Sorry-for-the-Hyphens". They gained a small cult following as a result of their minor se...
    • Like a Boss - Tired of all the speculation, George went back to 1984 and showed the world who was the boss. It was George.
    • Get To Da Choppa! - In 2020 George and Neal produced a very special episode of Dateline's "To Catch A Predator". It was a great success and they captured a lion, three gr...
    • Neality TV - After the success of the show "The L-Word", Neal and George produced a television show based upon Neal's life. In retrospect, it should have been obvi...
    • Show All...
View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • Bucket Run - George was not the inventor of the famed "bucket run" at U of I, despite the widely held belief (the original bucket run was not actually invented, bu...
  • Welcome aboard Sam! - In 2012, George's sons Sam and Mike wondered if they had the potential to be as amazing as their dad and his friend Neal. Sam wanted to learn to make ...
  • Robot Enslavement, Take 2 - In 2045, robots took over the world. Not as scary as you'd think. The robots were friendly, personable, and wonderful leaders of the enslaved human ra...
  • Metric Woes - Unable to persuade America to convert to the Metric system, in 2087 George and Neal successfully convinced America to abandon their current measuring ...
  • If You Survive the Looks You'll Be Tickled Smaragdine... - You know that saying, "If looks could kill"? Well, for a short period in 1868 some looks actually could kill. Glares, frowns, and the evil eye were ...


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