The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!
Entries From Saturday, November 30, 2013
2 Entries on This Page
On April 12, 2012, the matching game, Candy Crush, was released on Facebook. Less than one year later, Candy Crush became the most popular game on Facebook, with 46 million monthly users. Most people do not realize that this is simply a rip-off of Neal's earlier 2010 game, Haggis Crush.
It was no surprise to anyone that a matching game involving an animal's stomach (containing a sheep's heart, liver and lungs, minced with onion, oatmeal, suet, spices, and salt) would be so much fun!
Photo by: Neal
Neal was very upset by this blatant copy, until George reminded him that both Haggis and Candy Crush were obvious rip-offs of George's 1982 Coleco game, Orange Crush Crush.
All the excitement of a trash compactor, in 8-bit glory!
Photo by: Neal
Given that the boys already made a hefty sum from their Bejeweled rip-off, Vajazzled, the boys just let this one go. (Editor's Note: As of July 2013, it has been estimated that Candy Crush Saga earns $633,000 per day in the US section of the iOS App Store alone. So, perhaps this was the wrong one to "let go".)
In 2024 George and Neal published a collection of lesser known quotes by famous people. They compiled this collection of quotes by painstakingly travelling back in time and stalking people until they said something profound (or not so much as the case may be). The book was a best seller... for them, which means it really didn't sell well at all. Here's a sampling of a few of the more than 300 insights they collected:
- "Boy, I feel kind of bloated today." Carl Sagan
"What a weird day." Steven King
"Who ate all my nachos?" Camille Paglia
"My feet stink." Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
"I should have just stayed in bed today." Napoleon Bonaparte
"I wonder what George and Neal are up to. Maybe I can steal some of their ideas!" Bette Midler
"Man...I could really go for some Arby's." Gandhi
"This is SPARTAAAAAA!!!!!" George A. Custer
"I've fallen and I can't get up!" George A. Custer (a few minutes later)
"That was a great play!" Abraham Lincoln
"Shhhh, did you hear that?" J. S. Bach
"I'm too drunk to taste this chicken." Colonel Sanders
"Someone get me a mirror and a hairbrush, please." Albert Einstein
"Not tonight, I have a headache." Salvador Dali
"Mufwa ad mub wum afwormin dut." Ozzy Ozborne
"Meh weema ehs meh leef min." Bob Dylan
"Today's shaping up to be a movies and PJs day." Queen Elizabeth II
"That was a two flusher if I've ever seen one." Alan Alda
"Hey you, get out of my closet!" Joan of Arc
"They may take our cullen skink, but they'll never take our haggis!" William Wallace
"Does this nemes make me look fat?" Cleopatra
"Does this baseball cap make me look fat?" Dom Deluise
Volume 1 had over 1000 pages. Volume 2 had 1200 pages. Volume 3 had nearly 1500 pages. Unfortunately 3400 of the 3700 pages were blank.
Photo by: George
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The Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures through Time and Space (and Pudding)! is fully supported by... Well, nothing currently. We recently added ads (is that redundantly repetitive?) to our site in the hopes that we can earn a little bit of cash to pay to keep this site running. You see, all the piles and piles of money we make through our various business ventures, inventions, good fortune, and, ahem, other various schemes goes right back into funding for more research, travels, lawsuits, and general debauchery. So you see, there's nothing really left to keep this website going.
So, if you feel so inclined, you may graciously donate your organs, blood, or other bodily fluids to keep our website going. Or you could just send us a few bucks via PayPal, we're pretty easy like that (that's what she said). In return you'll gain the satisfaction of knowing that you are helping to educate millions and billions of individual cells (which really amounts to only a fraction of a person since it is estimated that the brain contains somewhere between 80-120 billion nerve cells (neurons), and neurons only make up about 50% of the cells in a human brain). Oh, and if you so request, we might include you in a future adventure (or maybe a past one).
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Thanks for reading, and we hope you're not too traumatized after your visit.
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