The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!

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Entries From Tuesday, July 07, 2009

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4 Entries on This Page

 

In 1669 Neal invented the ellipses (...), however his first version was flawed. George suggested adding two more dots so that people would stop confusing it with a period. Now people correctly trail off dreamily when they encounter ellipses instead of an abrupt ending... (See how that works?) On a completely unrelated note, George and Neal teamed up in 1154 to invent the alphabet. Except for the letter Q.

 

In 1987, while working on their little known chromosome research project, George and Neal discovered that the Y chromosome was merely a "lazy X" chromosome. This explains why most men are less productive (and let's face it, hygienic) than women. Of course, this data was accidentally suppressed by George and Neal, because they were too lazy to mail it in for publication. They'll get to it. Someday.

 

In 1815 George invented the handlebar mustache; however no one understood the name. So in 1817 he invented the velocipede and suddenly everyone knew what handlebars were. The handlebar mustache was wildly popular, especially among military generals, guys who like twirling things absentmindedly, villains, and guys named Vern. Neal's invention of the unibrow was not quite as well received. Our collaboration on mutton chop sideburns was extremely popular, however, and we urge everyone to go out and get one.

 

In 1956 George and Neal founded a super-duper-triple-secret organization. I can't tell you the name of the society or I would have to kill you, but I can tell you that it can be recognized by the symbol ¤. Our meeting houses have sprung up all over the country and we have placed them very close to highways to make them easily accessible. You've probably seen the dome/pyramid hybrid buildings near exit and entrance ramps. Membership is by invitation only. We do have a way to gain entry without a formal invitation, however. All you have to do is solve the following riddle and then knock on the door to one of our meeting houses with the answer. "What number comes next in this series: 1, 11, 21, 1211, 111221, 312211, 13112221, ???" We're waiting!

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