The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!
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Darwin Loves Us!
Entry Logged on: March 13, 2009 to Part 1 by: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)Page Views: 497 - Times Displayed: 7412
In 10,000 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable thumb. In secret documents, Darwin acknowledged this fact, and renounced his natural selection theory. Confusingly, the Vatican has suppressed this information for generations.
He couldn't have been that mad; he gave us a signed copy!
Photo by: Neal
Tags:
.10000 bce(1)
ancient wonders(9)
body parts(14)
christian(8)
evolution(5)
inventions(49)
people of history(33)
prehistoric(6)
Names Mentioned:
charles darwin(2)
vatican(3)
<< Previous Saga Entry
(The Prolific Pancake Pileup) Next Saga Entry >>
(The Opposable Nose: The Origin)
(The Prolific Pancake Pileup) Next Saga Entry >>
(The Opposable Nose: The Origin)
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People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality:
charles darwin(2),
vatican(3)
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- .10000 bce - (No Other Entries)
- ancient wonders - (8 Other Entries)
- George & Neal's Excellent Adventure - In 1988, Bill and Ted went on an excellent adventure. Nothing compared to the exploits of George and Neal, which the movie was based off of. However, ...
- Igpay Atinlay: The Origin - Onway ethay iptray ackbay otay 2010 Ealnay andway Eorgegay accidentallyway entway otay 2010 BCEAY. Erethay eythay inventedway Igpay Atinlay. Ethay ang...
- The World's Gone Tipsy - In 1932 the Italian government hired George to stabilize the Leaning Tower of Pisa to prevent its collapse. Starting during its construction and cont...
- There is No Zero! - In 1966 George and Neal decided to visit the year 0, but the adventures they had in year 0 were so debaucherous that all reference to the year has bee...
- Feats of Strength!™ - In 2000 BCE, Neal and George traveled to the English county of Wiltshire to participate in the yearly Feats of Strength!™. George lifted a cow (using ...
- Show All...
- body parts - (13 Other Entries)
- The Opposable Nose: The Origin - In 9,996 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable nose. It wasn't as well received and didn't go on to quite the success as the opposable thumb. Ho...
- Back Surgey - In 1997 both Neal and George had major back surgery after carrying one too many bathtubs full of caffeinated, carbonated, goodness. For any normal hum...
- Golden Spleens - In 4539 George and Neal decided to dabble in alchemy and turned themselves into golden statues. Luckily the effects were only temporary and by 5935 t...
- Ultra-Mega Teeth Brushing and Cleaning System - In 1758 George and Neal invented tooth paste. Their first attempt was made from actual ground up teeth and was used to hold in dentures, but eventuall...
- Neal Simon's Manhood - Also in 2009, Neal's manhood became sentient and demanded to secede from his body. It was thought, (only by George, known by the rest of the world) th...
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- christian - (7 Other Entries)
- Olympic Snowball - In 2022, at George and Neal's insistence (ok, it was actually persistence - we agreed to finally stop whining about it if the IOC included it - we can...
- Sisters of Endless Guilt - In 1962 George and Neal dressed as nuns and moved into the Sisters of Endless Guilt convent, just for kicks. We lived there for three and a half month...
- EastKippur - In an effort to unify religions, George and Neal combined Easter and Yom Kippur, (known as "EastKippur"). Unfortunately, this resulted in a cruel iron...
- Keeping Kosher - Neal enjoys eating pickled pig snouts, but only if they're Kosher. George enjoys eating all the foods his wife won't let him eat.
- Joy to Everyone! - In 2019 George and Neal made a fortune by selling Christmas snow globes. It was all an accident, really. We thought we had this great idea to make C...
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- evolution - (4 Other Entries)
- Unintelligent Design - In 2111 George and Neal made waves in the ongoing debate on Evolution vs. Creationism with a new theory of Unintelligent Design, which states that a d...
- Save the Dinosaurs - 65 million years ago George and Neal used their teleportation device to rescue countless dinosaurs from impending doom when a comet was about to crash...
- Skullets Rock! - In 1983 George convinced Patrick Stewart that it was time to change his hairstyle and shave his afro. Neal suggested a mohawk instead, which Patrick ...
- Taylor Wharton LABS-40K Cryogenic Freezer - 680 Million years ago George and Neal were snooping around prehistoric earth studying ancient single celled organisms. When they left, Neal absentmind...
- inventions - (48 Other Entries)
- The Twelve Step Approach - In 2010 George insisted Neal seek therapy to break his addiction to board games. Neal entered the program but came out six weeks later with a great id...
- We'd Need a Thneed Indeed! - In 1965 George and Neal invented an odd-looking but versatile garment that everyone needs. In 1971 we licensed the story of the growing Thneed industr...
- Rock Smoothies & Time Machines: The Origin - They also built a time machine, accidentally, while trying to fix a blender. The blender was originally broken when George and Neal decided to make "R...
- Search Engine Search Engine (no, we didn't stutter) - By 2040, the number of internet search engines were so voluminous and staggering (including Infoseek, Lycos, Yahoo, Google, Magellan, AltaVista, Ask J...
- Connect One - After "Connect the Dot" the movie broke box office records, George and Neal decided to create a new game upon which to base another movie. The result?...
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- people of history - (32 Other Entries)
- Butch Cassidy's Wild Bunch Gang - For a few years near the end of the 19th century George and Neal organized several bands of outlaws and robbed banks and trains in the old west. We we...
- George Neal - In 2029, George and Neal decided to tinker with building functional teleportation technology. Unfortunately, it had been years since either Neal or G...
- Hollow Earth - On and off for 35,000 years George and Neal worked on hollowing out the Earth. The dirt we hauled out was used to make the moon. The interior of the E...
- Viking/English Hostility - On June 8, 793 AD George and Neal orchestrated the first Viking attack on England; the raid on the monastery of Lindisfarne in Northumbria. This was t...
- It's Convenient: The Origin - In 711 AD on July 11th at 7:11pm George and Neal invented the convenience store. Then, in 1927 some guy named Joe Thompson completely ripped off our i...
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- prehistoric - (5 Other Entries)
- Vacationing in 165,003 B.C. - In 165,003 BCE George and Neal visited Macronesia, a large continent in the now Pacific Ocean (not to be confused with Macaronesia in the Atlantic). U...
- Lavender, Lavender Everywhere - In 2013, Neal and George totally negated existence as a result of a time paradox created by the two. In 2015, Neal and George totally fixed the proble...
- 3 Already Displayed with Another Tag
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Other Posts:
- A Worthy Cause! - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, a story about a child born as an old man who aged in reverse, wasn’t always a work of fiction. Originally, there...
- Bum Ba Bum, Ba Bum Bum... - In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum securi...
- No One Out Quotes The Donald - Did you know that George and Neal have written speeches for so many great politicians? Some of their best work includes:“I cannot tell you how gratef...
- Able Archer 83: The Origin - In 1983, George devised a 10-day NATO exercise to simulate World War 3, so that all nations participating could see what would happen in the worst cas...
- The Great Smog of '52 - In 1952 (but chronologically in 1997 during a trip in a time machine they co-invented) George and Neal visited London, resulting in the Great Smog of ...
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