The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!
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Books Change Lives (In Terribly Manipulative Ways)!
Entry Logged on: April 11, 2014 to Part 4 by: Neal - Photos by: Neal (3)Page Views: 670 - Times Displayed: 10265
In 1957, scientists discovered that children were suffering from extremely low self-esteem. To combat this, George and Neal created an award-winning series of books that sought to increase kids’ self esteem. Unfortunately, this plan backfired as by 2032, children everywhere had too much self-esteem, resulting in every child refusing to learn, do their chores, and even bathe (“Pshaw,” kids would say, “I smell just fine.”). Attempting to reverse the effect of their books, George and Neal wrote a separate series of books aimed at reducing self esteem (including, “Mommy Will Love You Forever, Unless…”; “Accidents Happen and You Are Proof!”; “Daddy’s Porsche (And Other Things We Could Have Afforded If We Didn’t Have You)”; “Nightmares Happen When God is Mad at You”; and “Let’s Buy Your Cemetery Plot (Because You'll Die Someday”). People are divided over whether these books caused the collapse of civilization in 6142.
It's nice that Neal got to pass on wisdom his father told him as a child.
Photo by: Neal
Pictured Above: Optimism.
Photo by: Neal
Pictured Above: Unconditional Love.
Photo by: Neal - Caption by: George
(World Record for Longest Time Chewing Gum) Next Saga Entry >>
(Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber Want to Be Us!)
Tags & Related Posts:
Tags:- 1957 - (No Other Entries)
- 2032 - (1 Other Entry)
- World Record for Longest Time Chewing Gum - In 2032 George decided to attempt the world record for the longest time continuously chewing a piece of gum (previously listed as 417 days). He was g...
- 6142 - (No Other Entries)
- award-winning - (No Other Entries)
- collapse of civilization - (2 Other Entries)
- The World's Gone Tipsy - In 1932 the Italian government hired George to stabilize the Leaning Tower of Pisa to prevent its collapse. Starting during its construction and cont...
- There is No Zero! - In 1966 George and Neal decided to visit the year 0, but the adventures they had in year 0 were so debaucherous that all reference to the year has bee...
- daddy's porsche - (No Other Entries)
- god is mad at you - (No Other Entries)
- nightmares - (1 Other Entry)
- Say Anything (That Won't Get You Arrested) - In 1988 Neal's infatuation with John Cusack reached an all-time high. John was generally pretty cool with it, but during the filming of Say Anything ...
- purchase a cemetery plot - (No Other Entries)
- self-esteem - (No Other Entries)
Other Posts:
- Religious iDeals - In an effort to avoid paying taxes on his massive fortune, in 1935, Neal established the first truly secular religion, Nealism. Honoring the tenets of...
- George Spores - In September 1928, Neal and George decided to attempt to clone themselves so that future generations could benefit from their awesomeness. Neal believ...
- He grabbed my hand and whispered, 'Run!' - The long running television series Doctor Who is loosely based on George and Neal's adventures, except their time machine does not look like a police ...
- Viking/English Hostility - On June 8, 793 AD George and Neal orchestrated the first Viking attack on England; the raid on the monastery of Lindisfarne in Northumbria. This was t...
- The DHARMA Initiative - In 1973, Neal and George co-founded the DHARMA initiative (yeah, those Lost guys got the idea from us), in an effort to prevent the pending apocalypse...
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