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Bob, I miss my testicles, you jerk!

Entry Logged on: September 28, 2009 to Part 3 by: Neal
Page Views: 143 - Times Displayed: 6378

In 1988, George and Neal created cats and dogs with opposable thumbs and above-average intellects. Everyone was thrilled with the evolutionary jump - well, everyone except Bob Barker, who received copious amounts of angry letters from the critters. George and Neal's favorites include: "Hey Bob Barker - Screw you! Love, Cats & Dogs"; "Bob, I miss my testicles, you jerk! - Fido" and "Barker, YOUR balls are MINE!" Many animal activists have sided with the animals, calling for Bob Barker to be neutered. Gerbils, parakeets, and a number of other household pets have refused to take sides.

Tags: 1988(6) body parts(14) cats(8) celebrities(69) save the aminals(6)
Names Mentioned: bob barker(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal

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People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: bob barker(1)

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  • 1988 - (5 Other Entries)
    • Say Anything (That Won't Get You Arrested) - In 1988 Neal's infatuation with John Cusack reached an all-time high. John was generally pretty cool with it, but during the filming of Say Anything ...
    • Visiting Eternia - In 1988 George and Neal used their teleportation device to travel to the planet Eternia to inform the inhabitants of the successful legal proceedings ...
    • George & Neal's Excellent Adventure - In 1988, Bill and Ted went on an excellent adventure. Nothing compared to the exploits of George and Neal, which the movie was based off of. However, ...
    • Who's the Bossasaur? - In 1904, just one year after Elmer Riggs published his paper stating that Apatosaurus and Brontosaurus were the same creature, George and Neal discove...
    • Definitely not Vain - In 1988, Neal and Billy Joel started a fire. Billy Joel denies it. In 2000, Carly Simon admitted she wrote "You're so Vain" about her 10-month, steamy...
    • Show All...
  • body parts - (13 Other Entries)
    • Feats of Strength!™ - In 2000 BCE, Neal and George traveled to the English county of Wiltshire to participate in the yearly Feats of Strength!™. George lifted a cow (using ...
    • Science Donations - In 1999, Neal tried to give his body to science. After 30 days, his body was returned as being defective.
    • Golden Spleens - In 4539 George and Neal decided to dabble in alchemy and turned themselves into golden statues. Luckily the effects were only temporary and by 5935 t...
    • Lava Lamps: The Origin - In 1960 Neal invented the precursor to the lava lamp, affectionately called the 'Squeegee Glow Blob Light'. However in 1963 British accountant Edward...
    • Hungry Eyes - In 1987, Neal organized a one-man a protest against Dial Corporation, demanding that they move their headquarters back to Chicago. Neal's rage was ini...
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  • cats - (7 Other Entries)
    • Fun With Genetics - Neal does not like the taste of fish. In 2000, George decided to help out Neal by playing around with genetics to create the first fish that tasted li...
    • A Meme is Born - LOLcats: The Origin - In 1821 George and Neal had a very nice lunch with Charles Babbage, but at one point George brought out his laptop for a quick check of his Facebook a...
    • Kidnapped by Ninjas - In 2009, while writing an update to this profile, Neal was kidnapped by ninjas. (Though, truth be told, Neal took out 58 of the ninjas with his awesom...
    • Having Doubts... - At 12:56am on Friday, July 10, 2009 George wondered if anyone ever reads The Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures Through Time and Space (and Pu...
    • Bob Ross: The Origin - In 1968 George and Neal trained a kitten to paint. That kitten in turn trained Bob Ross to paint. Bob Ross in turn taught countless of people to paint...
    • Show All...
  • celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
    • Cookin' with Martha and Neal - In 1990, George began producing Martha Stewart's new cooking show, "Cookin' with Martha and Neal". The show ran for two very successful seasons; howev...
    • Clint Ain't Wacko! - In August 2012, Clint Eastwood was thought to have embarrassed himself at the Republican National Convention by pretending to argue with an invisible ...
    • Clean, Efficient, Traumatizing Feeble Power - In 1998, George decided to traumatize Neal by forcing him to watch Peter Jackson's lesser known muppets-on-drugs movie, Meet the Feebles. Neal has bee...
    • Hollywood DermaFleck - In 1967, George and Neal traveled to Hollywood, to start their business, "Skin Flakes of the Stars". They sold exactly what you think. People reacted ...
    • 3014 Was Weird - In 3014, feeling melancholy as a result of a worldwide illness that removed the human eye's ability to detect a significant amount of electromagnetic ...
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  • save the aminals - (5 Other Entries)
    • What's a Typewriter? - In 2025 George and Neal received a grant from the US government to study the long held belief that if you give a billion monkeys a billion typewriters...
    • Hollow Earth - On and off for 35,000 years George and Neal worked on hollowing out the Earth. The dirt we hauled out was used to make the moon. The interior of the E...
    • Beating Unicorns is Totally Tasteless - In 1991, Neal organized a protest against brutality toward unicorns called Beating Unicorns is Totally Tasteless, or B.U.T.T. Decades later, George in...
    • Save the Dinosaurs - 65 million years ago George and Neal used their teleportation device to rescue countless dinosaurs from impending doom when a comet was about to crash...
    • Here Be Dragons - On a trip back to 1227 BCE George and Neal discovered that dragons did in fact inhabit major portions of the earth. Different species of dragons lived...
    • Show All...
View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • Witness Protection - In 1992, when they were prime witnesses in the trial of Chicago's Polish Mafia boss Mogul Downhillski, George and Neal entered witness protection wher...
  • Team Ghandi - In 1972, not satisfied with only two teams, Neal and George created Chicago's third major league baseball team, Team Ghandi. Unfortunately, the team n...
  • Sorry-for-the-Hyphens - In 1983, George and Neal started the hair-metal/country band "Sorry-for-the-Hyphens". They gained a small cult following as a result of their minor se...
  • Historic 10 year journey from Chicago to DeKalb - Just last year George and Neal began their historic 10 year journey from Chicago to DeKalb. Currently they're stuck in traffic and just called their w...
  • Welcome Back Potter - Overwhelmed by the success of the Harry Potter franchise (books, movies, games, cereals, tampons, etc.) and eager to revive the 1970's sitcoms, in 200...


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