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We Got (no) Game!

Entry Logged on: February 08, 2021 to Part 4 by: Neal - Photos by: Neal (4)
Page Views: 453 - Times Displayed: 990

Athletes. They command respect, admiration, and free Wheaties cereal. Having conquered every other field imaginable (and then creating fields not yet imagined and conquering those) George and Neal's traveled to 1990 to become world-renowned athletes.

Unfortunately, as neither George nor Neal possessed a modicum of athletic ability, they DID become world-renowned athletes... but not for the reasons they had hoped. Neal was the first baseball player to somehow break his pelvis when he hit himself in the face with a bat. George was banned from the world of golf, after tackling players repeatedly. He pretended he didn't know the rules. No one believed him.

Still, since at that time sports cards were a billion dollar industry, George and Neal managed to make a hefty sum releasing cards that reflected their most memorable moments of their short lived foray into sports.

 

We Got (no) Game! - Michael Jordan listed this as his favorite moment in sports history, even above his multiple championships.

Michael Jordan listed this as his favorite moment in sports history, even above his multiple championships.

Photo by: Neal

 

 - "Wait... wait...  wait... I can do this!" George said repeatedly.  He remained in this position for seventeen hours.

"Wait... wait... wait... I can do this!" George said repeatedly. He remained in this position for seventeen hours.

Photo by: Neal

Neal's daughter, Ayla, also threw her hat in the ring. Regrettably, it was a sumo ring.

 

 - "Where do I grab?  WHERE DO I GRAB???" Ayla said, before being spun around like a human pizza.

"Where do I grab? WHERE DO I GRAB???" Ayla said, before being spun around like a human pizza.

Photo by: Neal

Despite their great financial success, George and Neal considered erasing that timeline entirely. As they pondered the possibility, they were flooded with letters from children everywhere, thanking them. It turns out that George and Neal were inspirations - no child is embarrassed to try, and fail, at sports, since they could never do any worse than George and Neal. So yeah... George and Neal erased that timeline. The only evidence of this rare failure are some trading cards and a few very used jock straps. Aside: do not upset George or Neal, or they will mail you very used jock straps.

Tags: 1990(3) dodge ball(1) dodgeball(1) embarrassing(1) Michael Jordan(1) sports(24) trading cards(1) you reading these George?(1)
Names Mentioned: george(5) Michael Jordan(1) Neal(4)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (4)

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People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: george(5), Michael Jordan(1), Neal(4)

Tags:
  • 1990 - (2 Other Entries)
    • Settling The Great Debate - In an attempt to settle the long-running debate whether human behavior is determined by a person’s genes or rather by their enviro...
    • Cookin' with Martha and Neal - In 1990, George began producing Martha Stewart's new cooking show, "Cookin' with Martha and Neal". The show ran for two very successful seasons; howev...
  • dodge ball - (No Other Entries)
  • dodgeball - (No Other Entries)
  • embarrassing - (No Other Entries)
  • Michael Jordan - (No Other Entries)
  • sports - (23 Other Entries)
    • Get To Da Choppa! - In 2020 George and Neal produced a very special episode of Dateline's "To Catch A Predator". It was a great success and they captured a lion, three gr...
    • Play With George's Balls! - Unfortunately, after George's Basket Ball Company, Play With George's Balls!, experienced significant losses due to lawsuits surrounding his latest ga...
    • Feats of Strength!™ - In 2000 BCE, Neal and George traveled to the English county of Wiltshire to participate in the yearly Feats of Strength!™. George lifted a cow (using ...
    • Peaches and CREAM! - Years later, Neal and George had limited success as the Rollerderby team, "Peaches and CREAM!"
    • International Infant Sporting League - In 2009, after George surpassed Neal by 100% in the number of genetically descended offspring, Neal and Clarissa got busy, very busy. In 2011 Neal wel...
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  • trading cards - (No Other Entries)
  • you reading these George? - (No Other Entries)
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  • Max Headroom - Since 1986, every Friday evening, on odd numbered days, in years with digits that add up to 3 or 8, George and Neal hang out with Max Headroom. Un-un-...
  • High School - Jealous that the fictitious time travelers, Bill and Ted, got to meet and bring historical figures to their timelines, George and Neal decided to one-...
  • Neal Simon's Manhood - Also in 2009, Neal's manhood became sentient and demanded to secede from his body. It was thought, (only by George, known by the rest of the world) th...
  • Fotomat Selfie - As a result of Instagram’s success in 2010, on April 1, 2010 George and Neal went back to 1980 and changed the names of all the “FotoMats” to “Sometim...
  • Norris and Nye - George and Neal taught Chuck Norris everything he knows about kicking ass and Bill Nye everything he knows about science.


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