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Hawking's melodious robotic voice... Ahhh....

Entry Logged on: September 06, 2009 to Part 2 by: Neal
Page Views: 210 - Times Displayed: 7480

In 2036, tired of attempting to potty train their many, many children (combined, George and Neal sired 664 children, thanks to their wives, who have been cloned many times over as George and Neal can't seem to get enough of them), George and Neal gathered the best and brightest scientific minds (read: just the two of them - oh, and they also included Stephen Hawking, not because he's as smart as Neal and George (he's not), but rather because they liked hearing Hawking's melodious robotic voice). The goal: discover a way to eliminate the need to potty train children. Two hours later, the solution was discovered. George and Neal combined the awesome, near-supernatural powers of duct tape and children's pottys, and revealed their newest invention, the "Toilet Tush Taper" (aka "Poop Cubed") to the world. (((Patent (and significantly better name) pending.))) This invention did not sell well, though, after someone realized that the "invention" of taping a toilet to a child's touchas was really the same thing as a diaper. A much heavier, messier, terrible diaper. Red Green was impressed at the ingenious use of duct tape though.

Tags: 2036(2) celebrities(69) failures(22) inventions(48) offspring(13) poop(7) science(28) wives(15)
Names Mentioned: red green(1) stephen hawking(1)
Entry Logged By: Neal

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Tags & Related Posts:

People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: red green(1), stephen hawking(1)

Tags:
  • 2036 - (1 Other Entry)
    • ...and over and over and over... - In 2036 George and Neal started one of the most aggressive research studies into ESP and telepathy (prophecy wasn't included since we already had our ...
  • celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
    • Couch Vibrations with Brian Wilson - As long as we're on the topic of classic rock music groups, it should be noted that George, Neal, and Brian Wilson were founding members of the Beach ...
    • I Dare You! - On September 6, 2010, George and Neal initiated a series of dares, each more shocking than the last. It started innocently enough, when George dared N...
    • That Bastard Chuck Norris - In 2077 George and Neal revolutionized the mathematical world when they discovered a method of dividing by zero. Yes, Chuck Norris did it first, but ...
    • Don Cherry's Wardrobe: The Origin - George and Neal are in charge or Don Cherry's wardrobe.
    • Chicken To Ride - And Other Classics Done Right - In 2012 George and Neal recorded an album of cover songs, except instead of the actual lyrics we sang the lyrics that everyone thinks the original art...
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  • failures - (21 Other Entries)
    • Luckily for cats, this was a very short period. - During the brief period where George and Neal were not awesome (see www.george-and-neal-are-not-awesome.info), they invented Cat Baseball. It... did ...
    • We Help You Help Yourself - Self Help Clinic - In 2005, George and Neal founded the "We Help You Help Yourself - Self Help Clinic". It is unknown at this time whether the Clinic was a whopping succ...
    • Metric Woes - Unable to persuade America to convert to the Metric system, in 2087 George and Neal successfully convinced America to abandon their current measuring ...
    • It Hood Ats Fla Was - In 2014, George decided that he could make a better dictation-to-text program than what was currently available (such as Dragon Dictation and Apple's ...
    • Marshmonica as Endorsed by John Popper - Dateline, 2058: In an effort to feed as well as entertain the homeless, George and Neal invented the first edible harmonica. Much to George's dismay, ...
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  • inventions - (47 Other Entries)
    • The ChickenPede - In 1996 George and Neal cross bred a centipede with a chicken (that was one wild night, let me tell you). The resulting mutant became a favored pet of...
    • Handlebar Mustache: The Origin - In 1815 George invented the handlebar mustache; however no one understood the name. So in 1817 he invented the velocipede and suddenly everyone knew w...
    • Ultra-Mega Teeth Brushing and Cleaning System - In 1758 George and Neal invented tooth paste. Their first attempt was made from actual ground up teeth and was used to hold in dentures, but eventuall...
    • Calendar Confusion - In 46 BCE George and Neal suggested a new calendar to Julius Caesar. Caesar adopted most of the rules we specified, but not all of them. In 1582 Georg...
    • Dr. Mountain Pepper Dew BBQ Sauce - In 2008, Neal convinced the makers of Dr. Pepper (which he claimed was the greatest jaguanst available, at least until the year 3041, when the superio...
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  • offspring - (12 Other Entries)
    • What happens in Ancient Greece stays in Ancient Greece. - Tired of caring for three children (yes, George, that includes you), Julie recruited Clarissa to go on a time traveling "ladies only" vacation. While...
    • iKing George - In 1014, George founded the Kingdom of Northeast Georgia, and became King George I (known affectionately as iKing). Beginning in October of that year ...
    • Welcome aboard Sam! - In 2012, George's sons Sam and Mike wondered if they had the potential to be as amazing as their dad and his friend Neal. Sam wanted to learn to make ...
    • Zoo Trip Time Machine - In March 2010 George and Neal got their families together for a trip to the zoo. They had a fantastic time and said it was a shame they hadn't done t...
    • GONADS - In 2009 George, along with Neal's wife Clarissa, developed the Genetic Origins Nurturing And Development System or GONADS. This revolutionary device t...
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  • poop - (6 Other Entries)
    • Paper Product Hoarders - In 1994 George began his extensive napkin collection. He collected paper cafeteria napkins and stored them in school lockers around the world. Aroun...
    • Cold Fusion - In 2035 George and Neal (using their time machine again) discovered the secret to producing Cold Fusion power. Unfortunately at the time they didn't r...
    • PDD Reactor - In 2068 George and Neal invented the PDD Reactor, a source of nearly endless energy. It converts Poopy Disposable Diapers into highly efficient energy...
    • The Bucket List - In 1994 George and Neal decided that, although they had had many adventures and experienced some really amazing things that most other people can't ev...
    • There is No Zero! - In 1966 George and Neal decided to visit the year 0, but the adventures they had in year 0 were so debaucherous that all reference to the year has bee...
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  • science - (27 Other Entries)
    • Going all Einstein on your mouth... - In order to celebrate his genius, George and Neal went back in time to 1952 to meet Albert Einstein. Rather than being interested in scientific breakt...
    • Family Week - In September 2012 George took a short break from time travelling, changing history, and altering the laws of physics to spend some more time with his ...
    • Norris and Nye - George and Neal taught Chuck Norris everything he knows about kicking ass and Bill Nye everything he knows about science.
    • Fun With Genetics - Neal does not like the taste of fish. In 2000, George decided to help out Neal by playing around with genetics to create the first fish that tasted li...
    • Science Donations - In 1999, Neal tried to give his body to science. After 30 days, his body was returned as being defective.
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  • wives - (14 Other Entries)
    • He grabbed my hand and whispered, 'Run!' - The long running television series Doctor Who is loosely based on George and Neal's adventures, except their time machine does not look like a police ...
    • Them Amazing Ladies - In 2001 George married the most incredible woman ever to live, past, present, and future, leaving Neal to settle for the second best, although if you ...
    • International Infant Sporting League - In 2009, after George surpassed Neal by 100% in the number of genetically descended offspring, Neal and Clarissa got busy, very busy. In 2011 Neal wel...
    • Lego Prison - In 2012 George and Neal's kids Mike, Sam, Adin, and Ayla snatched the time machine and traveled to 1948 where they were able to convince legislators t...
    • El Niño and La Niña - On a trip to northwestern Peru in 1923 George and Neal both befriended and eventually married the Lopez sisters. The sisters gave birth to two childre...
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View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • George and Neal and the Masters of the Universe - In 1981, after the character Orko appeared in the cartoon He-Man, in a move that confused most of the world, Neal sued the cartoon company for infring...
  • Horton Hears A Gremlin - In the early 2000's, George and Neal were hired by FOX studios to pitch movie ideas. Given their many adventures, you'd think they would have a wealth...
  • Documentaries - Throughout the years George and Neal have helped create several famous documentaries, including Gheorghe Marinescu's "The walking troubles of organic ...
  • Great Organization Over Development of the Global Relief of Idiocy Effort - In 1978 George and Neal received the Nobel Peace Prize for their work for the Great Organization Over Development of the Global Relief of Idiocy Effor...
  • Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod - On June 1, 2011, Neal and George debuted their MMORPG video game, Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod (yes, it is an actual place in Oregon, as i...


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