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Entry Logged on: September 04, 2009 to Part 2 by: George - Photos by: George (1)
Page Views: 170 - Times Displayed: 4407

In 1989 George and Neal were instrumental in the launch of the new chocolate DOVE Promises. Each wrapper featured an inspirational promise. Unfortunately the promises turned out to be big lies and the launch was a huge failure. I guess we shouldn't have had sayings like "Of course I'll call you tomorrow." or "No dear, that outfit does not make you look fat, I swear!" and "I will not raise taxes if I'm elected." DOVE canned us and two years later launched their successful line of chocolate Promises. We're now writing exclusively for the American Meteorological Society.

 

Get $245 Free (maybe) - Seriously. Send our adventures to all your friends. You'll either get the $245 or have fewer friends, we make no promises (oh, wait, that was the whole problem...)

Seriously. Send our adventures to all your friends. You'll either get the $245 or have fewer friends, we make no promises (oh, wait, that was the whole problem...)

Photo by: George

Tags: 1989(3) business ventures(46) failures(22) food(45) weather(7)
Names Mentioned: american meteorological society(1) dove chocolate(1)
Entry Logged By: George - Photos by: George (1)

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People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: american meteorological society(1), dove chocolate(1)

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  • 1989 - (2 Other Entries)
    • The World's Gone Tipsy - In 1932 the Italian government hired George to stabilize the Leaning Tower of Pisa to prevent its collapse. Starting during its construction and cont...
    • Falling Out - In 1989 George and Neal had a falling out and didn't speak to each other for over 40 years, until they reconnected over their love of "Rock Smoothies"...
  • business ventures - (45 Other Entries)
    • The Evian Mobile - In 1910 George and Neal, knowing the future issues that would be caused by the pollution from combustion engines, invented a highly efficient hydrogen...
    • In the Beginning... AKA: The Origin - Neal met George workin' on the farm. George always promised Neal he'd see the rabbits.After a falling out, they met years later on a city bus. Wait, d...
    • Westboro Baptist Church - In 2013, in an attempt to connect with the average American, Westboro Baptist Church contacted Neal and George for their advice. We recommended they ...
    • When fate hands us a lemon let's try to make a lemonade: The Origin - In 1906 George accidentally originated the popular phrase "When fate hands you lemons, make lemonade." This phrase was later published in Volume 26, ...
    • Dr. Mountain Pepper Dew BBQ Sauce - In 2008, Neal convinced the makers of Dr. Pepper (which he claimed was the greatest jaguanst available, at least until the year 3041, when the superio...
    • Show All...
  • failures - (21 Other Entries)
    • Slap-Bracelets: The Origin - In the mid-1990s, in an effort to assist law enforcement, Neal and George created a new lightweight, easy to use handcuff. To the shock and frustratio...
    • Marshmonica as Endorsed by John Popper - Dateline, 2058: In an effort to feed as well as entertain the homeless, George and Neal invented the first edible harmonica. Much to George's dismay, ...
    • We Help You Help Yourself - Self Help Clinic - In 2005, George and Neal founded the "We Help You Help Yourself - Self Help Clinic". It is unknown at this time whether the Clinic was a whopping succ...
    • Samhain and Zarathosht Diso - A second attempt to unite the religious holidays of Samhain and Zarathosht Diso was equally disastrous since neither of them was Wiccan or Zoroastrian...
    • Metric Woes - Unable to persuade America to convert to the Metric system, in 2087 George and Neal successfully convinced America to abandon their current measuring ...
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  • food - (44 Other Entries)
    • Neal's On Wheels - (Ahem). In 2040, Neal offered a new service to the general public, wherein he would transport people on his back while riding on roller skates. He cal...
    • Fear Factor Delicacies - In 1998, George convinced Neal to go on Fear Factor, where Neal went on to eat 50 scorpions, 12 worms, and over a hundred bull testicles. Neal later l...
    • Chewie Wookie Cookies - A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away... As a young girl, Princess Leia Organa was a member of the Alderaan Starflower Girl Scout Troop. Her tro...
    • Jerry Falwell's 65th Birthday Party - Riding the success of their 1992 appearance in Under Siege, George and Neal opened a cake delivery business called "Under Siege 2: Dark (Chocolate) Te...
    • Just Another Barbecue - In the summer of 2009, George and Neal had a barbecue. (Hey, not everything is as exciting as time traveling or fighting off townspeople.) Oh yeah, th...
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  • weather - (6 Other Entries)
    • Nobody does the weather like Neal (and that's a good thing). - In 2023 George and Neal each got jobs as meteorologists for competing local Chicago VV stations (VV will be the replacement for TV in the future). Bot...
    • Jaguanst Causes Climate Change - In a landmark, decade long study that George and Neal published the results of in 2012, it was discovered that the biggest cause of global warming was...
    • El Niño and La Niña - On a trip to northwestern Peru in 1923 George and Neal both befriended and eventually married the Lopez sisters. The sisters gave birth to two childre...
    • The Neo-Geo Fanclub - In an effort to find a way to accurately predict the weather, Neal and George devised a weather-prediction machine, which was comprised of a series of...
    • Taylor Wharton LABS-40K Cryogenic Freezer - 680 Million years ago George and Neal were snooping around prehistoric earth studying ancient single celled organisms. When they left, Neal absentmind...
    • Show All...
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Other Posts:

  • Nealocrats and Georgicans - In 2034, as a result of their love of George and Neal, America did away with their bipartisan political landscape, replacing it with a more unified go...
  • Bob, I miss my testicles, you jerk! - In 1988, George and Neal created cats and dogs with opposable thumbs and above-average intellects. Everyone was thrilled with the evolutionary jump - ...
  • The Georgeless Bunch - In 1969, George was up for the role as Greg Brady on the show The Brady Bunch. However, George did not get the part due to "accidentally" throwing a f...
  • It's Not a Jewish eBay - In 2014, Neal and George created the website, "Oybay", the very first auction website devoted entirely to the sale and purchase of Jewish items.
  • Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod - On June 1, 2011, Neal and George debuted their MMORPG video game, Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod (yes, it is an actual place in Oregon, as i...


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