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(1964 through 1969)


Ultra-Mega Teeth Brushing and Cleaning System

Entry Logged on: March 28, 2009 to Part 1 by: George & Neal Collaboration
Page Views: 319 - Times Displayed: 6949

In 1758 George and Neal invented tooth paste. Their first attempt was made from actual ground up teeth and was used to hold in dentures, but eventually they came up with a recipe for a tooth whitening and cleaning paste. In 1794 George and Neal invented the tooth brush to make applying the paste easier. We originally called it the "Ultra-Mega Teeth Brushing and Cleaning System", but Congress shortened that to "Tooth Brush", considering that most people by that time only had one or two teeth. Unfortunately, due to several obscure laws, the dental hygiene products are still unable to be sold or even used in Britain and Indiana.

Tags: 1758(1) 1794(1) body parts(14) britain(9) inventions(49) laws(10) toothpaste(4)
Names Mentioned: britain(8) indiana(1)
Entry Logged By: George & Neal Collaboration

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(Love Aid Rings)
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(1964 through 1969)



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People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: britain(8), indiana(1)

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  • 1758 - (No Other Entries)
  • 1794 - (No Other Entries)
  • body parts - (13 Other Entries)
    • Back Surgey - In 1997 both Neal and George had major back surgery after carrying one too many bathtubs full of caffeinated, carbonated, goodness. For any normal hum...
    • Lava Lamps: The Origin - In 1960 Neal invented the precursor to the lava lamp, affectionately called the 'Squeegee Glow Blob Light'. However in 1963 British accountant Edward...
    • Neal Simon's Manhood - Also in 2009, Neal's manhood became sentient and demanded to secede from his body. It was thought, (only by George, known by the rest of the world) th...
    • Hungry Eyes - In 1987, Neal organized a one-man a protest against Dial Corporation, demanding that they move their headquarters back to Chicago. Neal's rage was ini...
    • Darwin Loves Us! - In 10,000 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable thumb. In secret documents, Darwin acknowledged this fact, and renounced his natural selection t...
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  • britain - (8 Other Entries)
    • Feats of Strength!™ - In 2000 BCE, Neal and George traveled to the English county of Wiltshire to participate in the yearly Feats of Strength!™. George lifted a cow (using ...
    • Vatican Idol and Spin-offs - In 2007, hoping to cash in and ride on the success of American Idol, but knowing his limitations (such as poor fashion sense, body odor, warbley singi...
    • President Obama's Education Recovery Effort - In 2010, as part of President Obama's Education Recovery Effort, George & Neal's list of accomplishments became mandatory curriculum from 4th grade up...
    • Save the Dinosaurs - 65 million years ago George and Neal used their teleportation device to rescue countless dinosaurs from impending doom when a comet was about to crash...
    • Viking/English Hostility - On June 8, 793 AD George and Neal orchestrated the first Viking attack on England; the raid on the monastery of Lindisfarne in Northumbria. This was t...
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  • inventions - (48 Other Entries)
    • Search Engine Search Engine (no, we didn't stutter) - By 2040, the number of internet search engines were so voluminous and staggering (including Infoseek, Lycos, Yahoo, Google, Magellan, AltaVista, Ask J...
    • Love Aid Rings - In 1951, George and Neal decided to make a line of "Love Aid Rings" to sell to the public. Neal designed them based upon his own body, which he felt w...
    • Metric Woes - Unable to persuade America to convert to the Metric system, in 2087 George and Neal successfully convinced America to abandon their current measuring ...
    • Clean, Efficient, Traumatizing Feeble Power - In 1998, George decided to traumatize Neal by forcing him to watch Peter Jackson's lesser known muppets-on-drugs movie, Meet the Feebles. Neal has bee...
    • The Twelve Step Approach - In 2010 George insisted Neal seek therapy to break his addiction to board games. Neal entered the program but came out six weeks later with a great id...
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  • laws - (9 Other Entries)
    • Constitutionally Safe - A 1934 proposed amendment to the Constitution would have prevented George and Neal from having anything to do with interfering in global events again....
    • Lego Prison - In 2012 George and Neal's kids Mike, Sam, Adin, and Ayla snatched the time machine and traveled to 1948 where they were able to convince legislators t...
    • Measure Your Spaghetti - In 2018 George and Neal were invited to appear before the entire US Government to talk about their accomplishments. The talk started out normal enough...
    • Restraining Orders Suck - Between 2056 and 2058, George and Neal had little contact, due to a government-sought restraining order. During those years, Awesomeness!™ was outlawe...
    • Jaros/Simon 2016 vs Simon/Jaros 2016 - Exhausted with the mean-spirited nature of recent presidential elections as well as the inability of presidents to follow through on campaign promises...
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  • toothpaste - (3 Other Entries)
    • Teeth are for Wussies, so Give Edentulous a Chance - In order to prevent George and Neal from becoming destitute after the ADA failed to support their new toothpaste approximately three dozen musicians, ...
    • Tooth-whitening Toothpaste - George and Neal hit great fame in the late '80s after successfully marketing a tooth-whitening toothpaste. However, when it was discovered that the "p...
    • It's a buffet, not a Buffett... - In 2121 Neal was stranded in the middle of the Pacific Ocean on a desert island. However, Neal couldn't spell and thought he was on a dessert island....
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