The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!

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On April 12, 2012, the matching game, Candy Crush, was released on Facebook. Less than one year later, Candy Crush became the most popular game on Facebook, with 46 million monthly users. Most people do not realize that this is simply a rip-off of Neal's earlier 2010 game, Haggis Crush.

Neal was very upset by this blatant copy, until George reminded him that both Haggis and Candy Crush were obvious rip-offs of George's 1982 Coleco game, Orange Crush Crush.

Given that the boys already made a hefty sum from their Bejeweled rip-off, Vajazzled, the boys just let this one go. (Editor's Note: As of July 2013, it has been estimated that Candy Crush Saga earns $633,000 per day in the US section of the iOS App Store alone. So, perhaps this was the wrong one to "let go".)

 

In 2024 George and Neal published a collection of lesser known quotes by famous people. They compiled this collection of quotes by painstakingly travelling back in time and stalking people until they said something profound (or not so much as the case may be). The book was a best seller... for them, which means it really didn't sell well at all. Here's a sampling of a few of the more than 300 insights they collected:

"Boy, I feel kind of bloated today." Carl Sagan
"What a weird day." Steven King
"Who ate all my nachos?" Camille Paglia
"My feet stink." Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
"I should have just stayed in bed today." Napoleon Bonaparte
"I wonder what George and Neal are up to. Maybe I can steal some of their ideas!" Bette Midler
"Man...I could really go for some Arby's." Gandhi
"This is SPARTAAAAAA!!!!!" George A. Custer
"I've fallen and I can't get up!" George A. Custer (a few minutes later)
"That was a great play!" Abraham Lincoln
"Shhhh, did you hear that?" J. S. Bach
"I'm too drunk to taste this chicken." Colonel Sanders
"Someone get me a mirror and a hairbrush, please." Albert Einstein
"Not tonight, I have a headache." Salvador Dali
"Mufwa ad mub wum afwormin dut." Ozzy Ozborne
"Meh weema ehs meh leef min." Bob Dylan
"Today's shaping up to be a movies and PJs day." Queen Elizabeth II
"That was a two flusher if I've ever seen one." Alan Alda
"Hey you, get out of my closet!" Joan of Arc
"They may take our cullen skink, but they'll never take our haggis!" William Wallace
"Does this nemes make me look fat?" Cleopatra
"Does this baseball cap make me look fat?" Dom Deluise

 

The long running television series Doctor Who is loosely based on George and Neal's adventures, except their time machine does not look like a police box (their Rock Smoothie Machine looks more like a port-a-potty), they aren't time lords from another planet (they do have two hearts though - one each), they cause just about as many problems as they solve, they can't regenerate (at least not yet), while they have had a lot of nicknames in the past, The Doctor has never been one of them, they have no fear of becoming a red head, and they are much better looking than The Doctor. They do, however, occasionally take companions on their journeys. But unlike The Doctor, their companions are not random people they stumble into odd situations with. Instead their companions are carefully selected from an applicant pool of interested parties. Once a suitable companion is selected (they must of course be approved by their wives first), only then will the companion be subjected to odd situations. If you are interested in being an applicant please send a head shot, complete contact information, short description of yourself, photograph of your first pet, a 534 word essay on why you think George and Neal are the most incredible humans to exist in any (or all) time, and $163.26 in Canadian to: P.O. Box 75112, Gallifrey Way, New New York, NNY 314159.

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