The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!
Home -
First Post -
Part:
1 -
2 -
3 -
4 -
Newest Entries -
Popular Entries -
View Tags -
Free Ebooks -
Entry Timeline -
Email Signup -
Featured -
Favorites
<< Previous Saga Entry
(Facebook Edit-Off) Next Saga Entry >>
(Rock Smoothies & Time Machines: The Origin)
(Facebook Edit-Off) Next Saga Entry >>
(Rock Smoothies & Time Machines: The Origin)
Neal Simon's Manhood
Entry Logged on: February 14, 2009 to Part 1 by: George & Neal Collaboration - Photos by: Neal (1)Page Views: 913 - Times Displayed: 12312
Also in 2009, Neal's manhood became sentient and demanded to secede from his body. It was thought, (only by George, known by the rest of the world) that this was the result of Neal's long time habit of wussing out and doing things the girly way. In Neal's warped reality, Neal was so manly, that his manhood felt no need to continue being a part of Neal, as Neal would continue to be manly enough and could and would grow another one at will. The manhood's theme song during its secession campaign was a humorous '90s hit by the band King Missile. Years later, Neal's manhood started a website (www.nealsimonsmanhood.com), which met with some success - but likely only because people thought it was a website hosting pictures of the author/playwright who wrote "The Odd Couple", "Biloxi Blues", and "Lost in Yonkers". Initially, the website was not like that at all. Over time, however...
Scientific Fact #47(c): All people named Neal Simon are excellent lovers.
Photo by: Neal
Tags:
1990s(4)
2009(21)
amazing abilities(16)
body parts(14)
celebrities(69)
phallus(8)
theater(8)
websites(7)
xxx(11)
Entry Logged By:
George & Neal Collaboration
-
Photos by: Neal (1)
<< Previous Saga Entry
(Facebook Edit-Off) Next Saga Entry >>
(Rock Smoothies & Time Machines: The Origin)
(Facebook Edit-Off) Next Saga Entry >>
(Rock Smoothies & Time Machines: The Origin)
Home -
First Post -
Part:
1 -
2 -
3 -
4 -
Newest Entries -
Popular Entries -
View Tags -
Free Ebooks -
Entry Timeline -
Email Signup -
Featured -
Favorites
Tags & Related Posts:
People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality:
biloxi blues(1),
king missile(1),
lost in yonkers(1),
neil simon(1),
the odd couple(1)
Tags:
- 1990s - (3 Other Entries)
- When Lemurade Fails - When Neal's recipe for Lemurade failed to catch on in the early 1900s, George suggested that it may have been because Lemurade didn't contain any actu...
- Slap-Bracelets: The Origin - In the mid-1990s, in an effort to assist law enforcement, Neal and George created a new lightweight, easy to use handcuff. To the shock and frustratio...
- The Neo-Geo Fanclub - In an effort to find a way to accurately predict the weather, Neal and George devised a weather-prediction machine, which was comprised of a series of...
- 2009 - (20 Other Entries)
- Bucket Run - George was not the inventor of the famed "bucket run" at U of I, despite the widely held belief (the original bucket run was not actually invented, bu...
- Couch Potatoes Illustrated - Hearing about the steep decline in readers for magazines such as Sports Illustrated and Men's Health, George and Neal decided to start their own magaz...
- GONADS - In 2009 George, along with Neal's wife Clarissa, developed the Genetic Origins Nurturing And Development System or GONADS. This revolutionary device t...
- Zoo Trip Time Machine - In March 2010 George and Neal got their families together for a trip to the zoo. They had a fantastic time and said it was a shame they hadn't done t...
- Welcome Back Potter - Overwhelmed by the success of the Harry Potter franchise (books, movies, games, cereals, tampons, etc.) and eager to revive the 1970's sitcoms, in 200...
- Show All...
- amazing abilities - (15 Other Entries)
- We talked in haiku, | And then in anagrams, too. | Darned nuts, understand? - For a period of six months, George and Neal spoke only in haiku - followed by another period where they spoke only in anagrams. No one understood a si...
- No Photoshopping Allowed - In 2041, someone had the gall to accuse George and Neal of photoshopping images of their great accomplishments. George and Neal quickly provided hundr...
- uʍop ǝpısdn - In 2118 George and Neal turned the universe upside down. It was fun. Maybe we'll do it again some time.
- The Wilhelm Scream and Other Sounds - The Wilhelm Scream is pretty well known for being a sound effect used in many, many movies. What is less well known is that George and Neal also prov...
- That Bastard Chuck Norris - In 2077 George and Neal revolutionized the mathematical world when they discovered a method of dividing by zero. Yes, Chuck Norris did it first, but ...
- Show All...
- body parts - (13 Other Entries)
- Golden Spleens - In 4539 George and Neal decided to dabble in alchemy and turned themselves into golden statues. Luckily the effects were only temporary and by 5935 t...
- Science Donations - In 1999, Neal tried to give his body to science. After 30 days, his body was returned as being defective.
- Bob, I miss my testicles, you jerk! - In 1988, George and Neal created cats and dogs with opposable thumbs and above-average intellects. Everyone was thrilled with the evolutionary jump - ...
- Hungry Eyes - In 1987, Neal organized a one-man a protest against Dial Corporation, demanding that they move their headquarters back to Chicago. Neal's rage was ini...
- Rudolph: The Origin - In 2009, Neal suffered such a massive case of writer's block that his brain literally tried to leave his body by jumping out of his nose. This escape ...
- Show All...
- celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
- The Heroic Journey of Two Wonderful, Influential, Benevolent Human Beings - George and Neal walked completely across the country and back in only three days back in 1986. Everyone was really impressed and George and Neal went ...
- Oh Wilson, Wherefore Art Thou Wilson - Unbeknownst to many, and typical for a Hollywood film, 2000s blockbuster hit Cast Away, starring Tom Hanks, was nowhere near as good as the Broadway m...
- They like us, they REALLY like us! - Somehow, a tribute video was found in 1035 A.D. Weird... The video is a collection of photos from some of George and Neal's greatest achievements, set...
- President Obama's Education Recovery Effort - In 2010, as part of President Obama's Education Recovery Effort, George & Neal's list of accomplishments became mandatory curriculum from 4th grade up...
- To boldly go... - Unbeknownst to most people, the original Star Trek series was actually a documentary series about George and Neal's adventures. Captain Kirk and his ...
- Show All...
- phallus - (7 Other Entries)
- Jerry Falwell's 65th Birthday Party - Riding the success of their 1992 appearance in Under Siege, George and Neal opened a cake delivery business called "Under Siege 2: Dark (Chocolate) Te...
- Nobody does the weather like Neal (and that's a good thing). - In 2023 George and Neal each got jobs as meteorologists for competing local Chicago VV stations (VV will be the replacement for TV in the future). Bot...
- Love Aid Rings - In 1951, George and Neal decided to make a line of "Love Aid Rings" to sell to the public. Neal designed them based upon his own body, which he felt w...
- Dirk Diggler Ain't Got Nothin' - In 1991, Neal and George were beaten up by "Marky Mark" Wahlberg and 1 member of his Funky Bunch (specifically, Hector the Bootie Inspector). After kn...
- Geal - In 1955, a small village in Transylvania attempted to assassinate George and Neal for inventing Pig Latin. All attempts were unsuccessful, in part bec...
- Show All...
- theater - (7 Other Entries)
- Where the heck are Vladimir and Estragon? - In 1947 George and Neal spent several days in France waiting for their friends Vladimir and Estragon to show up. Neal later wrote a play about it call...
- Rue Bourbon is Distracting - In 2069 George and Neal wrote a musical, called "Home to Where the Sun Rises". The smash hit spent four years on Broadway before touring the world. ...
- Fingers of Doom!: the Helen Keller Story - In 1982, Neal and George wrote, produced, and starred in the off-Broadway musical, "Fingers of Doom!: the Helen Keller Story." The play, which had an ...
- Vanished Celebrity Vaudeville Variety Hour - In 1937 George and Neal, while experimenting with a new potato gun in the central Pacific, accidentally shot down Amelia Earhart's airplane. They were...
- Oh God I Shot Momma - In 1949, George starred in the off-Broadway (well, off-off Broadway) play "Oh God I Shot Momma" as the corpse. On a completely different note, that sa...
- Show All...
- websites - (6 Other Entries)
- Luckily for cats, this was a very short period. - During the brief period where George and Neal were not awesome (see www.george-and-neal-are-not-awesome.info), they invented Cat Baseball. It... did ...
- Joanie Loves Churros - In 1978 a temporary glitch in George and Neal's Time Machine (well, not so much a glitch as Neal spilling a tub of Tang drink mix onto the controls - ...
- Search Engine Search Engine (no, we didn't stutter) - By 2040, the number of internet search engines were so voluminous and staggering (including Infoseek, Lycos, Yahoo, Google, Magellan, AltaVista, Ask J...
- It's Not a Jewish eBay - In 2014, Neal and George created the website, "Oybay", the very first auction website devoted entirely to the sale and purchase of Jewish items.
- HeadPeriodical - In an effort to compete with Facebook, during 2011, Neal and George created the newest online community, HeadPeriodical. Seen by most as a cheap rip-o...
- Show All...
- xxx - (10 Other Entries)
- Neal's On Wheels - (Ahem). In 2040, Neal offered a new service to the general public, wherein he would transport people on his back while riding on roller skates. He cal...
- The George and Neal Newsnetwork - In 2040, Neal and George created a television news program devoted solely to chronicling their (mis)adventures, called the George and Neal Newsnetwork...
- Girls Gone Tame - In 2021, to capitalize on the new, extremely modest trends in fashion, George and Neal made millions off their new video series called "Girls Gone Tam...
- Two Seamstresses, One Thimble - In 1878, Eadweard Muybridge created what was essentially the world's first "motion picture." Later that year, Neal and George created the first viral ...
- Cookin' with Martha and Neal - In 1990, George began producing Martha Stewart's new cooking show, "Cookin' with Martha and Neal". The show ran for two very successful seasons; howev...
- Show All...
Other Posts:
- It's a buffet, not a Buffett... - In 2121 Neal was stranded in the middle of the Pacific Ocean on a desert island. However, Neal couldn't spell and thought he was on a dessert island....
- Snoutbook - In the latter half of the middle third of the eighth month of 2010 George and Neal started a new social networking site dedicated solely to the most t...
- People Against Kneeling - In October 2009, Neal was kidnapped by the group, People Against Kneeling (or PAK; male members are known as PAK-Men and those married to PAK-Men may ...
- Damn you, Midler! - In 2010 George and Neal single handedly (well, I guess double-handedly) save the US from a great depression, by creating a new industry devoted solely...
- Fun With Genetics - Neal does not like the taste of fish. In 2000, George decided to help out Neal by playing around with genetics to create the first fish that tasted li...
Home -
First Post -
Part:
1 -
2 -
3 -
4 -
Newest Entries -
Popular Entries -
View Tags -
Free Ebooks -
Entry Timeline -
Email Signup -
Featured -
Favorites
Visitor Stats
Mouse Over to View
The Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures through Time and Space (and Pudding)! is fully supported by... Well, nothing currently. We recently added ads (is that redundantly repetitive?) to our site in the hopes that we can earn a little bit of cash to pay to keep this site running. You see, all the piles and piles of money we make through our various business ventures, inventions, good fortune, and, ahem, other various schemes goes right back into funding for more research, travels, lawsuits, and general debauchery. So you see, there's nothing really left to keep this website going.
So, if you feel so inclined, you may graciously donate your organs, blood, or other bodily fluids to keep our website going. Or you could just send us a few bucks via PayPal, we're pretty easy like that (that's what she said). In return you'll gain the satisfaction of knowing that you are helping to educate millions and billions of individual cells (which really amounts to only a fraction of a person since it is estimated that the brain contains somewhere between 80-120 billion nerve cells (neurons), and neurons only make up about 50% of the cells in a human brain). Oh, and if you so request, we might include you in a future adventure (or maybe a past one).
Or, just click on one of the ads on our site. We'll get a few pennies, and there's no obligation for you, guaranteed or your money back!
Thanks for reading, and we hope you're not too traumatized after your visit.
View this on Facebook! Post comments!
George on Google+ | Neal on Google+ | George on Facebook | Neal on Facebook | Free Ebooks | Full Saga | Entry Timeline | Fun Stats | Featured | FavoritesXML Sitemap
All Content © 2009-2024 by George Jaros and Neal Simon
Disclaimer: If you think an image displayed here is owned by you, please contact us via the comment form or .
The TRUTH, for those that wish to seek it...
