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Cookin' with Martha and Neal

Entry Logged on: April 22, 2009 to Part 2 by: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)
Page Views: 261 - Times Displayed: 9881

In 1990, George began producing Martha Stewart's new cooking show, "Cookin' with Martha and Neal". The show ran for two very successful seasons; however, relations between Martha and Neal became strained, resulting in an on-air, climactic and violent fight between the two. Neal did not count on Martha's extremely long reach and proficiency with kitchen knives, and as a result he suffered greatly.

 

Cookin' with Martha and Neal - She'd as soon kill you as look at you.

She'd as soon kill you as look at you.

Photo by: Neal

Thankfully, George managed to bring Neal's corpse to the year 2050, where Neal was resuscitated. As a practical joke, George had Neal's testicles enlarged 500% and moved to his back. Surprisingly, Neal liked the new look, and his coinpurse remains unreasonably gigantic and misplaced to this day.

Tags: 1990(3) 2050(1) body parts(14) celebrities(69) oops(16) tv shows(49) xxx(11)
Names Mentioned: martha stewart(9)
Entry Logged By: Neal - Photos by: Neal (1)

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Tags & Related Posts:

People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: martha stewart(9)

Tags:
  • 1990 - (2 Other Entries)
    • Settling The Great Debate - In an attempt to settle the long-running debate whether human behavior is determined by a person’s genes or rather by their enviro...
    • We Got (no) Game! - Athletes. They command respect, admiration, and free Wheaties cereal. Having conquered every other field imaginable (and then creating fields not ye...
  • 2050 - (No Other Entries)
  • body parts - (13 Other Entries)
    • Hungry Eyes - In 1987, Neal organized a one-man a protest against Dial Corporation, demanding that they move their headquarters back to Chicago. Neal's rage was ini...
    • Science Donations - In 1999, Neal tried to give his body to science. After 30 days, his body was returned as being defective.
    • Bob, I miss my testicles, you jerk! - In 1988, George and Neal created cats and dogs with opposable thumbs and above-average intellects. Everyone was thrilled with the evolutionary jump - ...
    • Rudolph: The Origin - In 2009, Neal suffered such a massive case of writer's block that his brain literally tried to leave his body by jumping out of his nose. This escape ...
    • Neal Simon's Manhood - Also in 2009, Neal's manhood became sentient and demanded to secede from his body. It was thought, (only by George, known by the rest of the world) th...
    • Show All...
  • celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
    • Norris and Nye - George and Neal taught Chuck Norris everything he knows about kicking ass and Bill Nye everything he knows about science.
    • Vun (ah ah ah) Too (ah ah ah) Tree (ah ah ah)... - George was originally cast in the lead role as Michael Knight for the 1980's TV series Knight Rider, however due to conflicting interests (George was ...
    • Hair Match - In 2014, after declaring bankruptcy and losing everything, George and Neal came to their rescue and offered both Rod Blagojevich and Donald Trump an o...
    • Just Good Ol' Boys - In 1982 Neal and George played the roles of Coy and Vance respectively when John Schneider and Tom Wopat (Bo and Luke) walked off the set of the Dukes...
    • Skullets Rock! - In 1983 George convinced Patrick Stewart that it was time to change his hairstyle and shave his afro. Neal suggested a mohawk instead, which Patrick ...
    • Show All...
  • oops - (15 Other Entries)
    • Facebroke - On June 1, 2009 Neal broke Facebook, preventing George from uploading his latest awesome photos. This apparent sabotage was too little, too late for H...
    • Lavender, Lavender Everywhere - In 2013, Neal and George totally negated existence as a result of a time paradox created by the two. In 2015, Neal and George totally fixed the proble...
    • Taylor Wharton LABS-40K Cryogenic Freezer - 680 Million years ago George and Neal were snooping around prehistoric earth studying ancient single celled organisms. When they left, Neal absentmind...
    • Ten Cent Beer Night - On June 4th, 1974 George and Neal organized the first (and last) ever Ten Cent Beer Night at the Cleveland Municipal Stadium. The event was both a rag...
    • No Photoshopping Allowed - In 2041, someone had the gall to accuse George and Neal of photoshopping images of their great accomplishments. George and Neal quickly provided hundr...
    • Show All...
  • tv shows - (48 Other Entries)
    • Max Headroom - Since 1986, every Friday evening, on odd numbered days, in years with digits that add up to 3 or 8, George and Neal hang out with Max Headroom. Un-un-...
    • Vatican Idol and Spin-offs - In 2007, hoping to cash in and ride on the success of American Idol, but knowing his limitations (such as poor fashion sense, body odor, warbley singi...
    • After-School Specials - In the mid 1980's, Neal and George were hired by ABC to produce a series of after-school specials. Those of you who grew up in the 80's may remember (...
    • Nealotards - For six years, from 2021 to 2027 Neal tried very hard to get the world to pick up male-leotards as the latest fashion trend (he called them Nealotards...
    • Ralph Malph - In 1920, George unfortunately lost millions investing in a ponzi scheme, in which his investments were used to pay earlier investors. In 1979, Neal lo...
    • Show All...
  • xxx - (10 Other Entries)
    • Captain Gooey and The Incredible Taint - For a brief time in 1963, Neal and George became super heroes, using the pseudonym "Captain Gooey" and "The Incredible Taint", respectively. Their for...
    • The George and Neal Newsnetwork - In 2040, Neal and George created a television news program devoted solely to chronicling their (mis)adventures, called the George and Neal Newsnetwork...
    • Geal - In 1955, a small village in Transylvania attempted to assassinate George and Neal for inventing Pig Latin. All attempts were unsuccessful, in part bec...
    • Girls Gone Tame - In 2021, to capitalize on the new, extremely modest trends in fashion, George and Neal made millions off their new video series called "Girls Gone Tam...
    • There is No Zero! - In 1966 George and Neal decided to visit the year 0, but the adventures they had in year 0 were so debaucherous that all reference to the year has bee...
    • Show All...
View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • I Like My Cartoon Men Like I Like My Fish, Round and Pudgy - During 2003, while involved in their historic "Dare Ya..." competitions, Neal said, "George, I dare ya to create a real life Ziggy," (the adorable, no...
  • That Bastard Chuck Norris - In 2077 George and Neal revolutionized the mathematical world when they discovered a method of dividing by zero. Yes, Chuck Norris did it first, but ...
  • Ice Cream Sandwich: The Origin - In 1931, Neal made the mistake of ordering 10,000 loaves of chocolate wafers. (Okay, it wasn't a mistake - he just liked chocolate. It was a weak mome...
  • If You Survive the Looks You'll Be Tickled Smaragdine... - You know that saying, "If looks could kill"? Well, for a short period in 1868 some looks actually could kill. Glares, frowns, and the evil eye were ...
  • Presidential Fight Club - In 1947, Neal convinced Governor Thomas E. Dewey not to run for president, but rather to run as Neal's Vice President. George, hearing of this, was i...


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