The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!
Hair, Inc.
Entry Logged on: June 29, 2009 to Part 2 by: George - Photos by: George (2)Page Views: 841 - Times Displayed: 18103
In 1964 George and Neal started their niche business "Hair, Inc." in which they supplied the hair for your favorite rock stars and other celebrities. The business was an overnight success when the Beatles (who were actually all completely bald) became their first clients. Over the years our business has grown and we supply hair for all the biggest stars. We had our most profitable decade in the 1980's with the rise in popularity of "Glam Rock" and "Hair Metal" bands. Some of our highest profile clients include, in addition to The Beatles, Aerosmith, The Rolling Stones, Poison, Don King, Lyle Lovett, Twisted Sister's Dee Snider, Willie Nelson, ZZ Top (but just their beards), Gene Simmons and Ace Frehley of Kiss, Crystal Gayle, and the left half of David Bowie's head, just to name a few. We have been trying to gain Paul Simon, Ron Howard and Sinead O'Connor as clients for years without success. Brittney Spears was our client at one point, but we had a falling out in February 2007 before she turned to one of our inferior competitors, "Rock Locks" (who also services the rest of Kiss, Slaughter, Howard Stern, and Motley Crew, among others). We also used to do the hair for Metallica, until they decided to start sucking. About the only celebrity who's hair is actually real is our good friend David Allan Coe's, and that's some bad-ass hair for an old guy.
Thanks to Hair, Inc. very few people knew that the Fab Four were really the Bald Four.
Photo by: George
George on stage with his buddy David Allan Coe (not a client of Hair, Inc.). Neal wasn't allowed on stage, but he did take this awesome picture.
Photo by: George
Tags & Related Posts:
Tags:
- 1964 - (2 Other Entries)
- When Lemurade Fails - When Neal's recipe for Lemurade failed to catch on in the early 1900s, George suggested that it may have been because Lemurade didn't contain any actu...
- 1964 through 1969 - In 1983 Neal and George co-wrote a short story that chronicled their adventures from 1964 through 1969. The story was well received in the literary co...
- 2007 - (1 Other Entry)
- Vatican Idol and Spin-offs - In 2007, hoping to cash in and ride on the success of American Idol, but knowing his limitations (such as poor fashion sense, body odor, warbley singi...
- beatles - (2 Other Entries)
- The Rolling Beatles - So very, very tired of endless "Beatles vs. Stones" arguments, in 2022, George and Neal decided to do the only logical thing to resolve the issue: go ...
- Worst... Enya... Ever... - George was the fifth Beatle. However, due to a problem with the time machine, he had to forsake this role, give up fame and fortune and return to his ...
- business ventures - (45 Other Entries)
- In the Beginning... AKA: The Origin - Neal met George workin' on the farm. George always promised Neal he'd see the rabbits.After a falling out, they met years later on a city bus. Wait, d...
- SUPER POWERS - In 1975 a hiccup in the Teleportation Device George and Neal use to travel instantaneously across huge distances caused them to swap realities with al...
- Damn you, Midler! - In 2010 George and Neal single handedly (well, I guess double-handedly) save the US from a great depression, by creating a new industry devoted solely...
- Just don't use it on your clothes, please. - In 2048, Neal claimed to invent an invisibility potion, and thereafter used the potion to open up many financially successful invisible zoos. George l...
- The Fountain of Youth - In 1609 George and Neal discovered the Fountain of Youth in Florida, just where Ponce de Leon thought it was. We kept the fountain's location a secret...
- Show All...
- celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
- Swingin' Records! - In 2016, George and Neal turned their attention to songwriting. They ghost-wrote a string of musical hits, including "We Built This City" by Starship...
- Norris and Nye - George and Neal taught Chuck Norris everything he knows about kicking ass and Bill Nye everything he knows about science.
- Goodby Kimmie! - In December, 2011 Neal and George did the world a favor by getting rid of Kim Jong Il using a technique they spent decades perfecting. The "Remote Hea...
- Get To Da Choppa! - In 2020 George and Neal produced a very special episode of Dateline's "To Catch A Predator". It was a great success and they captured a lion, three gr...
- Hungry Eyes - In 1987, Neal organized a one-man a protest against Dial Corporation, demanding that they move their headquarters back to Chicago. Neal's rage was ini...
- Show All...
- hair - (11 Other Entries)
- We're Not Bigfoot - George and Neal are both virile, macho men - so much so that if they did not shave for two days, hair would grow all over their body, making them look...
- Hair Match - In 2014, after declaring bankruptcy and losing everything, George and Neal came to their rescue and offered both Rod Blagojevich and Donald Trump an o...
- Bob Ross: The Origin - In 1968 George and Neal trained a kitten to paint. That kitten in turn trained Bob Ross to paint. Bob Ross in turn taught countless of people to paint...
- The Neo-Geo Fanclub - In an effort to find a way to accurately predict the weather, Neal and George devised a weather-prediction machine, which was comprised of a series of...
- Skullets Rock! - In 1983 George convinced Patrick Stewart that it was time to change his hairstyle and shave his afro. Neal suggested a mohawk instead, which Patrick ...
- Show All...
- music - (25 Other Entries)
- Dirk Diggler Ain't Got Nothin' - In 1991, Neal and George were beaten up by "Marky Mark" Wahlberg and 1 member of his Funky Bunch (specifically, Hector the Bootie Inspector). After kn...
- Sorry-for-the-Hyphens - In 1983, George and Neal started the hair-metal/country band "Sorry-for-the-Hyphens". They gained a small cult following as a result of their minor se...
- Marshmonica as Endorsed by John Popper - Dateline, 2058: In an effort to feed as well as entertain the homeless, George and Neal invented the first edible harmonica. Much to George's dismay, ...
- I Had Another Dream - In 1940 George and Neal wrote and released a song entitled Dreaming of a Purple Christmas. The song was mildly successful and in 1941 Irving Berlin w...
- Sinatra Sluggers - In 1970, Neal and George went back in time to punch Frank Sinatra in the gut. Not because we had anything against Frank Sinatra per se, but rather bec...
- Show All...
Other Posts:
- Nealotards - For six years, from 2021 to 2027 Neal tried very hard to get the world to pick up male-leotards as the latest fashion trend (he called them Nealotards...
- Neal and Out - The Fall and Rise of a Modern Legend - In 2022 Neal was having a mid-life crisis and had decided to head to Vegas to gamble his life savings away. George joined him thinking it would be a g...
- The Idiots Guide To Circumcision - In 1995, George and Neal published the first ever "Idiots Guide To..." book under the pseudonyms "Astronauts Thomas D. Jones, Ph.D. and Michael Benson...
- New George and New Neal - On April 23, 1985, Coca-Cola changed its formula and released the New Coke. Not to be outdone, George and Neal intentionally altered their DNA to crea...
- High School - Jealous that the fictitious time travelers, Bill and Ted, got to meet and bring historical figures to their timelines, George and Neal decided to one-...
Visitor Stats
Mouse Over to View
The Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures through Time and Space (and Pudding)! is fully supported by... Well, nothing currently. We recently added ads (is that redundantly repetitive?) to our site in the hopes that we can earn a little bit of cash to pay to keep this site running. You see, all the piles and piles of money we make through our various business ventures, inventions, good fortune, and, ahem, other various schemes goes right back into funding for more research, travels, lawsuits, and general debauchery. So you see, there's nothing really left to keep this website going.
So, if you feel so inclined, you may graciously donate your organs, blood, or other bodily fluids to keep our website going. Or you could just send us a few bucks via PayPal, we're pretty easy like that (that's what she said). In return you'll gain the satisfaction of knowing that you are helping to educate millions and billions of individual cells (which really amounts to only a fraction of a person since it is estimated that the brain contains somewhere between 80-120 billion nerve cells (neurons), and neurons only make up about 50% of the cells in a human brain). Oh, and if you so request, we might include you in a future adventure (or maybe a past one).
Or, just click on one of the ads on our site. We'll get a few pennies, and there's no obligation for you, guaranteed or your money back!
Thanks for reading, and we hope you're not too traumatized after your visit.
View this on Facebook! Post comments!
George on Google+ | Neal on Google+ | George on Facebook | Neal on Facebook | Free Ebooks | Full Saga | Entry Timeline | Fun Stats | Featured | FavoritesXML Sitemap
All Content © 2009-2024 by George Jaros and Neal Simon
Disclaimer: If you think an image displayed here is owned by you, please contact us via the comment form or .
The TRUTH, for those that wish to seek it...
