The Grand Saga of
George and Neal's Adventures
Through Time and Space (and Pudding)!
Napoleon's iPod: The Origin
Entry Logged on: March 07, 2009 to Part 1 by: GeorgePage Views: 343 - Times Displayed: 7858
In 2001 Apple Computer Corporation released the iPod. Sources say that the design was based on an archaeological find from a dig in Russia near the location of the Battle of Borodino. Rumors were that it was a relic of an alien civilization that was manipulating Napoleon through an implant near his ear. They were confused by the label attached to it's battery compartment that said "Property of George, Neal keep your hands off!". Apple's first iPod was a nearly identical copy of the relic.
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- 2001 - (7 Other Entries)
- 7 South Dearborn Tower in Chicago - In 2001 George and Neal went hang gliding from the top of the 7 South Dearborn Tower in Chicago (yes, we know it was never built... in this timeline, ...
- Witness Protection - In 1992, when they were prime witnesses in the trial of Chicago's Polish Mafia boss Mogul Downhillski, George and Neal entered witness protection wher...
- From the generic - From the generic "How Do You Know" fields:Lived together?You lived in Sin in 1998.You lived in a van down by the river (but we swear nothing steamy ha...
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- aliens - (4 Other Entries)
- Area 51¾ - Area 51 - There is no such thing. I repeat, there is no such thing as Area 51. Area 51¾, however has been kept such a great secret by George and Neal ...
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- Not Conspiracy Theories - There are conspiracy theories, and then there's the truth. And here it is, at long last. There was no UFO crash at Roswell. It wasn't a weather balloo...
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- ancient wonders - (8 Other Entries)
- The Opposable Nose: The Origin - In 9,996 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable nose. It wasn't as well received and didn't go on to quite the success as the opposable thumb. Ho...
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- There is No Zero! - In 1966 George and Neal decided to visit the year 0, but the adventures they had in year 0 were so debaucherous that all reference to the year has bee...
- Darwin Loves Us! - In 10,000 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable thumb. In secret documents, Darwin acknowledged this fact, and renounced his natural selection t...
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- inventions - (48 Other Entries)
- Make the Trains Run on Thyme - Mussolini got his idea to tell everyone that he made the trains run on time after George and Neal invented a train that ran on thyme (Benito simply mi...
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- Cold Fusion - In 2035 George and Neal (using their time machine again) discovered the secret to producing Cold Fusion power. Unfortunately at the time they didn't r...
- Handlebar Mustache: The Origin - In 1815 George invented the handlebar mustache; however no one understood the name. So in 1817 he invented the velocipede and suddenly everyone knew w...
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- ipod - (1 Other Entry)
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- napoleon - (1 Other Entry)
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- origin - (23 Other Entries)
- Igpay Atinlay: The Origin - Onway ethay iptray ackbay otay 2010 Ealnay andway Eorgegay accidentallyway entway otay 2010 BCEAY. Erethay eythay inventedway Igpay Atinlay. Ethay ang...
- When fate hands us a lemon let's try to make a lemonade: The Origin - In 1906 George accidentally originated the popular phrase "When fate hands you lemons, make lemonade." This phrase was later published in Volume 26, ...
- Don Cherry's Wardrobe: The Origin - George and Neal are in charge or Don Cherry's wardrobe.
- In the Beginning... AKA: The Origin - Neal met George workin' on the farm. George always promised Neal he'd see the rabbits.After a falling out, they met years later on a city bus. Wait, d...
- The 3 Stooges: The Origin - In 1933, Columbia's "3 Nice Regular Guys" premiered, starring Moe Howard, Larry Fine, and George Jaros. The three produced 25 eight-to-twelve minute ...
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- Who's the Bossasaur? - In 1904, just one year after Elmer Riggs published his paper stating that Apatosaurus and Brontosaurus were the same creature, George and Neal discove...
- The Fountain of Youth - In 1609 George and Neal discovered the Fountain of Youth in Florida, just where Ponce de Leon thought it was. We kept the fountain's location a secret...
- Rudolph: The Origin - In 2009, Neal suffered such a massive case of writer's block that his brain literally tried to leave his body by jumping out of his nose. This escape ...
- Two Seamstresses, One Thimble - In 1878, Eadweard Muybridge created what was essentially the world's first "motion picture." Later that year, Neal and George created the first viral ...
- Duels of Toxicity - Beginning in 1777, every 4th of July, George and Neal would get together and throw a party for the most important and powerful American figures. The p...
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Other Posts:
- The Extreme-est of Makeovers - Tired of trying to do fifteen things at once but failing miserably (well, failing miserably at four, failing happily at six, performing moderately at ...
- 2015 - In 2015 George and Neal will have finalized all of the details surrounding their friendship. That is, until 2016, when they will have to chronicle all...
- EastKippur - In an effort to unify religions, George and Neal combined Easter and Yom Kippur, (known as "EastKippur"). Unfortunately, this resulted in a cruel iron...
- El Niño and La Niña - On a trip to northwestern Peru in 1923 George and Neal both befriended and eventually married the Lopez sisters. The sisters gave birth to two childre...
- Geal - In 1955, a small village in Transylvania attempted to assassinate George and Neal for inventing Pig Latin. All attempts were unsuccessful, in part bec...
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