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Taylor Wharton LABS-40K Cryogenic Freezer

Entry Logged on: April 08, 2009 to Part 1 by: George - Photos by: George (1)
Page Views: 946 - Times Displayed: 6563

680 Million years ago George and Neal were snooping around prehistoric earth studying ancient single celled organisms. When they left, Neal absentmindedly left their Taylor Wharton LABS-40K Cryogenic Freezer system behind when we were packing up to return home. Unfortunately he also left the lid open, causing a drastic decrease in the Earth's temperature. Earth slowly cooled to the point that it was entirely frozen. For over 30 Million years Earth was covered in a thick glacial layer of ice and snow, a period some scientists refer to as Snowball Earth. This frozen period in Earth's prehistory caused the delay of the development of multicellular life forms by 33,456,721 years, 6 months and 4 days (give or take a few weeks). So what is now 2009 AD should actually be the year 33,458,730 AD and human kind should have already evolved beyond the need for physical bodies, in fact far beyond what humans are even capable of fathoming. We can thank Neal for millions of years of setback.

 

Taylor Wharton LABS-40K Cryogenic Freezer - If Neal would have only remembered to shut the darn lid... We could be surfing the cosmos as pure energy right now instead of puttering about on this archaic thing we call the internet.

If Neal would have only remembered to shut the darn lid... We could be surfing the cosmos as pure energy right now instead of puttering about on this archaic thing we call the internet.

Photo by: George

Tags: .680000000 bce(1) 2009(21) 33458730(1) evolution(5) oops(16) prehistoric(6) science(28) weather(7)
Names Mentioned: taylor wharton(1)
Entry Logged By: George - Photos by: George (1)

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    • Darwin Loves Us! - In 10,000 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable thumb. In secret documents, Darwin acknowledged this fact, and renounced his natural selection t...
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    • The Opposable Nose: The Origin - In 9,996 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable nose. It wasn't as well received and didn't go on to quite the success as the opposable thumb. Ho...
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    • SUPER POWERS - In 1975 a hiccup in the Teleportation Device George and Neal use to travel instantaneously across huge distances caused them to swap realities with al...
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Other Posts:

  • The Guide to Everything - It surely goes without saying that, for thousands of years, George and Neal had an enormous impact on pop culture. They affected everything from tele...
  • Starring George & Neal!!! - Wanting to attain fame, but hoping to do so with as little effort as humanly possible, George and Neal went back in time to be recast in Hollywood blo...
  • Slap-Bracelets: The Origin - In the mid-1990s, in an effort to assist law enforcement, Neal and George created a new lightweight, easy to use handcuff. To the shock and frustratio...
  • Joanie Loves Churros - In 1978 a temporary glitch in George and Neal's Time Machine (well, not so much a glitch as Neal spilling a tub of Tang drink mix onto the controls - ...
  • Ice Cream Sandwich: The Origin - In 1931, Neal made the mistake of ordering 10,000 loaves of chocolate wafers. (Okay, it wasn't a mistake - he just liked chocolate. It was a weak mome...


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