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Witness Protection

Entry Logged on: March 04, 2009 to Part 1 by: George - Photos by: George (1)
Page Views: 188 - Times Displayed: 4910

In 1992, when they were prime witnesses in the trial of Chicago's Polish Mafia boss Mogul Downhillski, George and Neal entered witness protection where they were relocated to Idaho and given false names. They lived there for three years before they once again became key witnesses in a criminal case, this time against the eco-terrorist group "Bombing for Bushes". In a strange twist of fate, George and Neal (now known as Sven Jorgenson and Paco Lopez) were again put into witness protection. This time they were relocated to Champaign, IL and, ironically, given the names George Jaros and Neal Simon, although George was now Neal and Neal was now George. In 2001 they again became key witnesses, but this time in separate events. George (really Neal) was to testify against celebrity gangster D-pak Choppa in his murder trial of fellow thug and rapper Jarjar FallSwell. Neal (really George) was considered the expert witness, and the prosecution's slam dunk testimony, in the case of Reticulitermes virginicus vs X-Vermin-X Corporation due to the years he spent secluded in the deep wilderness studying and becoming a part of subterranean termite society. He was at one time knows as the Jane Goodall of termites. Anyway, in a very strange twist of fate, George (really George) was sent into Witness Protection in DeKalb and given the name George Jaros. Neal (really Neal) was sent into witness protection in Chicago the same year and given the name Neal Simon. Unfortunately, due to the secretive nature of witness protection, they were unable to reveal their past identities, resulting in this confusing mess. It all worked out in the end though, and those that might be looking for them are undoubtedly just as confused as everyone else. But please, don't say anything to anyone since this is all supposed to be a secret still. They have currently retired from the business of being key witnesses in criminal cases, since it was becoming too confusing to remember who they were at any given time, especially with all the time travel they do.

 

Witness Protection - The "Bombing for Bushes" eco-terrorist group wasn't your typical eco-terrorist group. Instead of creating turmoil to push environmental agendas, they just terrorized bushes. We witnessed plenty an azalea go up in flames before the FBI finally caught these punks.

The "Bombing for Bushes" eco-terrorist group wasn't your typical eco-terrorist group. Instead of creating turmoil to push environmental agendas, they just terrorized bushes. We witnessed plenty an azalea go up in flames before the FBI finally caught these punks.

Photo by: George

Tags: 1922(1) 2001(8) chicago(10) crimes & scams(16) dekalb(2) nicknames(14) secrets(4) u of i(3)
Names Mentioned: champaign(1) chicago(14) deepak chopra(1) dekalb(2) idaho(1) jane goodall(1) jerry falwell(2) poland(1) university of illinois(5)
Entry Logged By: George - Photos by: George (1)

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(Illuminati, New World Order, Bilderberg Group, Committee of 300, the Freemasons, Skull & Bones, The Stonecutters, and the Shriners)



Tags & Related Posts:

People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: champaign(1), chicago(14), deepak chopra(1), dekalb(2), idaho(1), jane goodall(1), jerry falwell(2), poland(1), university of illinois(5)

Tags:
  • 1922 - (No Other Entries)
  • 2001 - (7 Other Entries)
    • Infecting 1002 - In 2010, George and Neal went back in time to 2001 to stop themselves from hang gliding off 7 South Dearborn. Instead of arriving in 2001, they arrive...
    • Napoleon's iPod: The Origin - In 2001 Apple Computer Corporation released the iPod. Sources say that the design was based on an archaeological find from a dig in Russia near the lo...
    • 7 South Dearborn Tower in Chicago - In 2001 George and Neal went hang gliding from the top of the 7 South Dearborn Tower in Chicago (yes, we know it was never built... in this timeline, ...
    • From the generic - From the generic "How Do You Know" fields:Lived together?You lived in Sin in 1998.You lived in a van down by the river (but we swear nothing steamy ha...
    • Them Amazing Ladies - In 2001 George married the most incredible woman ever to live, past, present, and future, leaving Neal to settle for the second best, although if you ...
    • Show All...
  • chicago - (9 Other Entries)
    • Neal's On Wheels - (Ahem). In 2040, Neal offered a new service to the general public, wherein he would transport people on his back while riding on roller skates. He cal...
    • Chicago Cubs in the World Series! (Psyche!) - In 2412, 467 years after their last World Series appearance, the Chicago Cubs looked likely to finally break their Billy Goat Curse, however, in true ...
    • Nobody does the weather like Neal (and that's a good thing). - In 2023 George and Neal each got jobs as meteorologists for competing local Chicago VV stations (VV will be the replacement for TV in the future). Bot...
    • Historic 10 year journey from Chicago to DeKalb - Just last year George and Neal began their historic 10 year journey from Chicago to DeKalb. Currently they're stuck in traffic and just called their w...
    • Cheese Eatin' Bears - In 1919 George and Neal started raising a sleuth of bears that would eat only cheese. For quite a while this was pretty useless, but it came in very h...
    • Show All...
  • crimes & scams - (15 Other Entries)
    • Hair Match - In 2014, after declaring bankruptcy and losing everything, George and Neal came to their rescue and offered both Rod Blagojevich and Donald Trump an o...
    • Just don't use it on your clothes, please. - In 2048, Neal claimed to invent an invisibility potion, and thereafter used the potion to open up many financially successful invisible zoos. George l...
    • In Great Shape - In 1902 George and Neal developed a revolutionary diet program. The program slowly grew and evolved until the 1950s and 1960s when it suddenly took of...
    • Ralph Malph - In 1920, George unfortunately lost millions investing in a ponzi scheme, in which his investments were used to pay earlier investors. In 1979, Neal lo...
    • Need More Conventions!!! - By 2031 there were so many comic conventions and expos (including Comic-Con, WizCon, APE, C2E2, WonderCon, Comikaze, C4, MegaCon, Sac-Con, Pros & Con,...
    • Show All...
  • dekalb - (1 Other Entry)
    • 1 Already Displayed with Another Tag
  • nicknames - (13 Other Entries)
    • Captain Gooey and The Incredible Taint - For a brief time in 1963, Neal and George became super heroes, using the pseudonym "Captain Gooey" and "The Incredible Taint", respectively. Their for...
    • The Opposable Nose: The Origin - In 9,996 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable nose. It wasn't as well received and didn't go on to quite the success as the opposable thumb. Ho...
    • The Idiots Guide To Circumcision - In 1995, George and Neal published the first ever "Idiots Guide To..." book under the pseudonyms "Astronauts Thomas D. Jones, Ph.D. and Michael Benson...
    • On Online Dating - After the success of online dating websites such as "Eharmony" and "J-Date" (a social/dating website for Jewish people), George and Neal created their...
    • He grabbed my hand and whispered, 'Run!' - The long running television series Doctor Who is loosely based on George and Neal's adventures, except their time machine does not look like a police ...
    • Show All...
  • secrets - (3 Other Entries)
    • Area 51¾ - Area 51 - There is no such thing. I repeat, there is no such thing as Area 51. Area 51¾, however has been kept such a great secret by George and Neal ...
    • The Flying Porcupine (and not the Short S.25 Sunderland) - In 1921 George and Neal began the daunting task of teaching porcupines to fly. It was long, arduous, painful work, and after twelve long years they g...
    • The Secret Society of ¤ - In 1956 George and Neal founded a super-duper-triple-secret organization. I can't tell you the name of the society or I would have to kill you, but I ...
  • u of i - (2 Other Entries)
    • Bucket Run - George was not the inventor of the famed "bucket run" at U of I, despite the widely held belief (the original bucket run was not actually invented, bu...
    • The Multiverse - There are lots of stories about the Bermuda Triangle and how it causes ships and airplanes to mysteriously disappear. In actuality, this is the simply...
View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • Happy Chomp-akah - Wanting to "shake things up" for the next Hanukah, in 2013 Neal invented "Tleg", the exact opposite of Gelt - chocolate on the outside, gold foil on t...
  • Search Engine Search Engine (no, we didn't stutter) - By 2040, the number of internet search engines were so voluminous and staggering (including Infoseek, Lycos, Yahoo, Google, Magellan, AltaVista, Ask J...
  • George the Merciless - On a visit to 1932 George and Neal met with Alex Raymond and related some of this Saga. Alex was inspired and two years later created Flash Gordon, a...
  • Love those Anne Geddes baby-flower costumes. - For some unknown reason Japanese people like to take photographs of George. Only Neal likes to take photos of Neal, in those Anne Geddes baby-flower c...
  • Love Aid Rings - In 1951, George and Neal decided to make a line of "Love Aid Rings" to sell to the public. Neal designed them based upon his own body, which he felt w...


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