In 1974 George and Neal prevented a hostile takeover of the US by an army of chainsaw wielding raccoons. We did this by training squirrels to use nail guns to take out the raccoons. Unfortunately the squirrels got too sure of themselves and started taking out peanut vendors at sporting events. George and Neal solved this problem by meeting with the squirrels without preconditions. They agreed to stop shooting peanut vendors if we agreed to lift economic sanctions against their home nation of Sciuridaetopia.
In 1994 George and Neal prevented a hostile takeover of the US by an army of chainsaw wielding raccoons (yes, again). Luckily our nail gun firing squirrels that we trained in the 1974 incursion had multiplied (like rodents are prone to do) as had their arsenal. Because of George and Neal's diplomacy (and a few strategically placed peanut bribes) their nation of Sciuridaetopia sent their Sciuridaetopian National Independent Commando Killing Elite Reactionary Squirrel team (S.N.I.C.K.E.R.S.) to save us all from having to eat out of garbage cans and dip our food in water once again (although Neal does tend to enjoy his meals that way occasionally).
This raccoon stood no chance against the lightsaber wielding rodents...
Photo by: George
In 2014 the United States was overrun by a large number of giant squirrels. Apparently our neighbor, Sciuridaetopia had been conducting top secret genetic experiments when something went terribly wrong and the test subjects escaped, rampaging across Sciuridaetopia's main science campus in the capital city of Skiouros before fleeing into neighboring US territory. George and Neal lead a team of S.N.I.C.K.E.R.S. as well as members of various elite US military outfits to hunt down all of the gigantic squirrels. Thanks to George and Neal's heroic efforts all twelve escaped subjects were killed or captured. Sciuridaetopia has agreed to suspend their Ratufa Maximus program and is now focusing their scientific talents toward figuring out social issues they face, like how to get into a bird feeder atop a flag pole.
Our battles against Godzilla were great practice. Taking out squirrels was a piece of cake.
Photo by: George
The Grand Saga of George and Neal's Adventures through Time and Space (and Pudding)! is fully supported by... Well, nothing currently. We recently added ads (is that redundantly repetitive?) to our site in the hopes that we can earn a little bit of cash to pay to keep this site running. You see, all the piles and piles of money we make through our various business ventures, inventions, good fortune, and, ahem, other various schemes goes right back into funding for more research, travels, lawsuits, and general debauchery. So you see, there's nothing really left to keep this website going.
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