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Aracauna Flu

Entry Logged on: August 25, 2012 to Part 3 by: George - Photos by: George (1)
Page Views: 139 - Times Displayed: 6485

In 2068 George and Neal accidentally engineered a new strain of the flu virus, called Aracauna Flu, and then subsequently became the first people to catch the traumatic, but nonfatal disease. The symptoms of Aracauna Flu are much more uncomfortable than any previous flu strain, but luckily they rarely prove to be fatal. Symptoms start with a mild fever and nausea, followed by a sharp cough. Soon after the cough starts, victims will notice soft flaky growths beginning to cover the skin. Over the course of 48-72 hours the cough begins to sound more like a cluck and the flaky growths become more feather-like. At the height of the illness the afflicted will very closely resemble the Aracauna chicken, complete with sideburn like tufts of feathery growths (we suspect this may have something to do with our invention of muttonchop sideburns, but that theory is unproven). Luckily the whole affliction goes away suddenly when the patient wakes up one morning surrounded by a pile of feathers and with a morbid desire for an omelet. The only known fatalities of Aracauna Flu were the result of infected people getting too close to foxes or a Kenny Rodger's Roasters (so if you are afflicted, please stay out of the Philippines and Malaysia).

 

Aracauna Flu - It's a good thing we didn't run into Kenny Rogers. I mean, c'mon, look at those juicy breasts!

It's a good thing we didn't run into Kenny Rogers. I mean, c'mon, look at those juicy breasts!

Photo by: George

Tags: 2068(3) celebrities(69) chicken(2) diseases(9)
Names Mentioned: kenny rodger(1) kenny rodger roasters(1) malaysia(1) phillippines(1)
Entry Logged By: George - Photos by: George (1)

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People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: kenny rodger(1), kenny rodger roasters(1), malaysia(1), phillippines(1)

Tags:
  • 2068 - (2 Other Entries)
    • PDD Reactor - In 2068 George and Neal invented the PDD Reactor, a source of nearly endless energy. It converts Poopy Disposable Diapers into highly efficient energy...
    • A Worthy Cause! - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, a story about a child born as an old man who aged in reverse, wasn’t always a work of fiction. Originally, there...
  • celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
    • Sinatra Sluggers - In 1970, Neal and George went back in time to punch Frank Sinatra in the gut. Not because we had anything against Frank Sinatra per se, but rather bec...
    • Clint Ain't Wacko! - In August 2012, Clint Eastwood was thought to have embarrassed himself at the Republican National Convention by pretending to argue with an invisible ...
    • Hair, Inc. - In 1964 George and Neal started their niche business "Hair, Inc." in which they supplied the hair for your favorite rock stars and other celebrities. ...
    • That Bastard Chuck Norris - In 2077 George and Neal revolutionized the mathematical world when they discovered a method of dividing by zero. Yes, Chuck Norris did it first, but ...
    • 3014 Was Weird - In 3014, feeling melancholy as a result of a worldwide illness that removed the human eye's ability to detect a significant amount of electromagnetic ...
    • Show All...
  • chicken - (1 Other Entry)
    • The ChickenPede - In 1996 George and Neal cross bred a centipede with a chicken (that was one wild night, let me tell you). The resulting mutant became a favored pet of...
  • diseases - (8 Other Entries)
    • On Online Dating - After the success of online dating websites such as "Eharmony" and "J-Date" (a social/dating website for Jewish people), George and Neal created their...
    • The Damnation that was Smurfs - In 2099 scientists astounded the world by developing genetically engineered little blue creatures that wore nothing but white pants and hats. OK, so ...
    • We went fishing and all we caught was awful... - In 1976 George and Neal went fishing. All they caught was a cold, the flu, pneumonia, and scarlet fever. But luckily the lake they were fishing on h...
    • Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod - On June 1, 2011, Neal and George debuted their MMORPG video game, Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod (yes, it is an actual place in Oregon, as i...
    • Infecting 1002 - In 2010, George and Neal went back in time to 2001 to stop themselves from hang gliding off 7 South Dearborn. Instead of arriving in 2001, they arrive...
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View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • Like a Rock - After the hit song “What Does the Fox Say” became the top trending video of 2013, George and Neal released their song, “What Does The Rock Say”. It w...
  • Restraining Orders Suck - Between 2056 and 2058, George and Neal had little contact, due to a government-sought restraining order. During those years, Awesomeness!™ was outlawe...
  • QZIZZLE-PIZZLE - In 1856 George and Neal invented over six different types of keyboards, the now ubiquitous QWERTY keyboard, the still sometimes used Dvorak keyboard, ...
  • The World's Gone Tipsy - In 1932 the Italian government hired George to stabilize the Leaning Tower of Pisa to prevent its collapse. Starting during its construction and cont...
  • Connect One - After "Connect the Dot" the movie broke box office records, George and Neal decided to create a new game upon which to base another movie. The result?...


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