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Aracauna Flu

Entry Logged on: August 25, 2012 to Part 3 by: George - Photos by: George (1)
Page Views: 310 - Times Displayed: 8649

In 2068 George and Neal accidentally engineered a new strain of the flu virus, called Aracauna Flu, and then subsequently became the first people to catch the traumatic, but nonfatal disease. The symptoms of Aracauna Flu are much more uncomfortable than any previous flu strain, but luckily they rarely prove to be fatal. Symptoms start with a mild fever and nausea, followed by a sharp cough. Soon after the cough starts, victims will notice soft flaky growths beginning to cover the skin. Over the course of 48-72 hours the cough begins to sound more like a cluck and the flaky growths become more feather-like. At the height of the illness the afflicted will very closely resemble the Aracauna chicken, complete with sideburn like tufts of feathery growths (we suspect this may have something to do with our invention of muttonchop sideburns, but that theory is unproven). Luckily the whole affliction goes away suddenly when the patient wakes up one morning surrounded by a pile of feathers and with a morbid desire for an omelet. The only known fatalities of Aracauna Flu were the result of infected people getting too close to foxes or a Kenny Rodger's Roasters (so if you are afflicted, please stay out of the Philippines and Malaysia).

 

Aracauna Flu - It's a good thing we didn't run into Kenny Rogers. I mean, c'mon, look at those juicy breasts!

It's a good thing we didn't run into Kenny Rogers. I mean, c'mon, look at those juicy breasts!

Photo by: George

Tags: 2068(3) celebrities(69) chicken(2) diseases(9)
Names Mentioned: kenny rodger(1) kenny rodger roasters(1) malaysia(1) phillippines(1)
Entry Logged By: George - Photos by: George (1)

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Tags & Related Posts:

People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: kenny rodger(1), kenny rodger roasters(1), malaysia(1), phillippines(1)

Tags:
  • 2068 - (2 Other Entries)
    • A Worthy Cause! - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, a story about a child born as an old man who aged in reverse, wasn’t always a work of fiction. Originally, there...
    • PDD Reactor - In 2068 George and Neal invented the PDD Reactor, a source of nearly endless energy. It converts Poopy Disposable Diapers into highly efficient energy...
  • celebrities - (68 Other Entries)
    • Bob Ross: The Origin - In 1968 George and Neal trained a kitten to paint. That kitten in turn trained Bob Ross to paint. Bob Ross in turn taught countless of people to paint...
    • Dirk Diggler Ain't Got Nothin' - In 1991, Neal and George were beaten up by "Marky Mark" Wahlberg and 1 member of his Funky Bunch (specifically, Hector the Bootie Inspector). After kn...
    • Neal and Out - The Fall and Rise of a Modern Legend - In 2022 Neal was having a mid-life crisis and had decided to head to Vegas to gamble his life savings away. George joined him thinking it would be a g...
    • Get To Da Choppa! - In 2020 George and Neal produced a very special episode of Dateline's "To Catch A Predator". It was a great success and they captured a lion, three gr...
    • Hollywood DermaFleck - In 1967, George and Neal traveled to Hollywood, to start their business, "Skin Flakes of the Stars". They sold exactly what you think. People reacted ...
    • Show All...
  • chicken - (1 Other Entry)
    • The ChickenPede - In 1996 George and Neal cross bred a centipede with a chicken (that was one wild night, let me tell you). The resulting mutant became a favored pet of...
  • diseases - (8 Other Entries)
    • 3014 Was Weird - In 3014, feeling melancholy as a result of a worldwide illness that removed the human eye's ability to detect a significant amount of electromagnetic ...
    • Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod - On June 1, 2011, Neal and George debuted their MMORPG video game, Oregon Trail xTreme - The Road to Nimrod (yes, it is an actual place in Oregon, as i...
    • The Damnation that was Smurfs - In 2099 scientists astounded the world by developing genetically engineered little blue creatures that wore nothing but white pants and hats. OK, so ...
    • We went fishing and all we caught was awful... - In 1976 George and Neal went fishing. All they caught was a cold, the flu, pneumonia, and scarlet fever. But luckily the lake they were fishing on h...
    • George Spores - In September 1928, Neal and George decided to attempt to clone themselves so that future generations could benefit from their awesomeness. Neal believ...
    • Show All...
View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • Chicago Cubs in the World Series! (Psyche!) - In 2412, 467 years after their last World Series appearance, the Chicago Cubs looked likely to finally break their Billy Goat Curse, however, in true ...
  • KISS - George and Neal were once part of the rock band KISS, but left the band in 1974 because they didn't think makeup of a raccoon and chimp respectively w...
  • Leggo Your Logo - In August 2019 the popular hobby website Board Game Geek changed their logo from the lovable, cuddly geek to a strange, orange, amorphous blob (appare...
  • Just Good Ol' Boys - In 1982 Neal and George played the roles of Coy and Vance respectively when John Schneider and Tom Wopat (Bo and Luke) walked off the set of the Dukes...
  • Role Playing, SFW-style - In 2013, Neal introduced George to the role-playing game, Dungeons and Dragons. George thought it was fantastic, as it blended his love of story tell...


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