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The World's Gone Tipsy

Entry Logged on: July 26, 2016 to Part 4 by: George - Photos by: George (9)
Page Views: 160 - Times Displayed: 2787

In 1932 the Italian government hired George to stabilize the Leaning Tower of Pisa to prevent its collapse. Starting during its construction and continuing until George's stabilization project the tower gradually shifted to lean 5.5 degrees. But George's ingenious network of spider silk support cables and carbon fiber beams, all hidden beneath the crust of the earth, connected the tower to a number of other famous stable structures around the world, including the Great Pyramid at Giza, Statue of Liberty, the pyramid El Castillo at the Temple of Kukulkan in Chichen Itza, the Taj Mahal, Notre-Dame Cathedral, Castle Neuschwanstein, Bodiam Castle, the newly finished Christ the Redeemer statue, and the Hall of Supreme Harmony in the Forbidden City. Unfortunately records were lost and from 1989 to 2001 unnecessary restoration projects straightened the tower by removing soil from under the higher side of the foundation so it only leaned 3.99 degrees.

By 2038 tourism in Pisa had dropped significantly and the Italian Government decided to hire Neal to straighten the leaning tower once and for all. Neal, as usual, used the amazing strength in his thighs to just push the tower into a perfectly vertical position. Unfortunately, Neal knew nothing of George's former stabilization project and his method of brute force architectural restoration caused every monumental structure that George had previously anchored the tower to to tilt in response. So, starting in 2038, you'll be able to travel the globe and visit the Leaning Great Pyramid at Giza, Leaning Statue of Liberty, the Leaning Temple of Kukulkan in Chichen Itza, the Leaning Taj Mahal, Leaning Notre-Dame Cathedral, Leaning Castle Neuschwanstein, Leaning Bodiam Castle, the Leaning Christ the Redeemer statue, and the Leaning Hall of Supreme Harmony in the Forbidden City.

 

The World's Gone Tipsy - It also doubles as a motorcycle ramp, perfect for jumping things, like sharks!

It also doubles as a motorcycle ramp, perfect for jumping things, like sharks!

Photo by: George

 

 - Now she really looks French.  Too much wine Frenchy?

Now she really looks French. Too much wine Frenchy?

Photo by: George

 

 - 1,000 mortal souls were sacrificed on this spot.  That's what happens when Neal visits after having the local burritos.

1,000 mortal souls were sacrificed on this spot. That's what happens when Neal visits after having the local burritos.

Photo by: George

 

 - Apparently one of the trees was attached to one of the spider silk support cables...

Apparently one of the trees was attached to one of the spider silk support cables...

Photo by: George

 

 - Hey look, Notre Dame is French, too!  Too much wine Frenchy?

Hey look, Notre Dame is French, too! Too much wine Frenchy?

Photo by: George

 

 - The crookedness of the castle now matches the crookedness of the spelling (and pronunciation).  ...Neuschwanstein... (Gesundheit!)

The crookedness of the castle now matches the crookedness of the spelling (and pronunciation). ...Neuschwanstein... (Gesundheit!)

Photo by: George

 

 - They now have a problem with flooding.  We'll fix that in 2094...

They now have a problem with flooding. We'll fix that in 2094...

Photo by: George

 

 - Not French, but I hear he's big on wine, too, especially with all that water around...

Not French, but I hear he's big on wine, too, especially with all that water around...

Photo by: George

 

 - China immediately claimed that the Hall of Supreme Harmony is still perfectly straight, it's the rest of the world that is leaning.

China immediately claimed that the Hall of Supreme Harmony is still perfectly straight, it's the rest of the world that is leaning.

Photo by: George

Tags: 1932(2) 1989(3) 2001(8) 2038(1) africa(3) ancient egypt(2) ancient wonders(9) architecture(1) asia(2) collapse of civilization(3) europe(4) george's genious(1) miley cyrus is not in this post in any way(7) neal's thighs(1) north america(2) south america(3) we built this city on rock and roll(3)
Names Mentioned: Bodiam Castle(1) castle neuschwanstein(1) chichen itza(1) christ the redeemer(1) el castillo(1) forbidden city(1) great pyramid at giza(2) hall of supreme harmony(1) leaning tower of pisa(1) notre-dame cathedral(1) statue of liberty(1) taj mahal(1) temple of kukulkan(1)
Entry Logged By: George - Photos by: George (9)

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Tags & Related Posts:

People, Places, Companies, Products, and Things mentioned that you may recognize from your reality: Bodiam Castle(1), castle neuschwanstein(1), chichen itza(1), christ the redeemer(1), el castillo(1), forbidden city(1), great pyramid at giza(2), hall of supreme harmony(1), leaning tower of pisa(1), notre-dame cathedral(1), statue of liberty(1), taj mahal(1), temple of kukulkan(1)

Tags:
  • 1932 - (1 Other Entry)
    • George the Merciless - On a visit to 1932 George and Neal met with Alex Raymond and related some of this Saga. Alex was inspired and two years later created Flash Gordon, a...
  • 1989 - (2 Other Entries)
    • Get $245 Free (maybe) - In 1989 George and Neal were instrumental in the launch of the new chocolate DOVE Promises. Each wrapper featured an inspirational promise. Unfortunat...
    • Falling Out - In 1989 George and Neal had a falling out and didn't speak to each other for over 40 years, until they reconnected over their love of "Rock Smoothies"...
  • 2001 - (7 Other Entries)
    • Saved By The 1-Up - In 1991 Neal was found dead after a long session of Bad Dudes, however he luckily received a 1-Up just before perishing and was able to be revived by ...
    • From the generic - From the generic "How Do You Know" fields:Lived together?You lived in Sin in 1998.You lived in a van down by the river (but we swear nothing steamy ha...
    • Them Amazing Ladies - In 2001 George married the most incredible woman ever to live, past, present, and future, leaving Neal to settle for the second best, although if you ...
    • 7 South Dearborn Tower in Chicago - In 2001 George and Neal went hang gliding from the top of the 7 South Dearborn Tower in Chicago (yes, we know it was never built... in this timeline, ...
    • Witness Protection - In 1992, when they were prime witnesses in the trial of Chicago's Polish Mafia boss Mogul Downhillski, George and Neal entered witness protection wher...
    • Show All...
  • 2038 - (No Other Entries)
  • africa - (2 Other Entries)
  • ancient egypt - (1 Other Entry)
    • World's Firster Selfie - After Neal claimed to be in the first "selfie", George decided to both photobomb that "selfie" and then one-up Neal (because that's what he does). So...
  • ancient wonders - (8 Other Entries)
    • Feats of Strength!™ - In 2000 BCE, Neal and George traveled to the English county of Wiltshire to participate in the yearly Feats of Strength!™. George lifted a cow (using ...
    • The Opposable Nose: The Origin - In 9,996 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable nose. It wasn't as well received and didn't go on to quite the success as the opposable thumb. Ho...
    • Igpay Atinlay: The Origin - Onway ethay iptray ackbay otay 2010 Ealnay andway Eorgegay accidentallyway entway otay 2010 BCEAY. Erethay eythay inventedway Igpay Atinlay. Ethay ang...
    • George & Neal's Excellent Adventure - In 1988, Bill and Ted went on an excellent adventure. Nothing compared to the exploits of George and Neal, which the movie was based off of. However, ...
    • Darwin Loves Us! - In 10,000 BCE, Neal and George invented the opposable thumb. In secret documents, Darwin acknowledged this fact, and renounced his natural selection t...
    • Show All...
  • architecture - (No Other Entries)
  • asia - (1 Other Entry)
    • 1 Already Displayed with Another Tag
  • collapse of civilization - (2 Other Entries)
    • Books Change Lives (In Terribly Manipulative Ways)! - In 1957, scientists discovered that children were suffering from extremely low self-esteem. To combat this, George and Neal created an award-winning...
    • There is No Zero! - In 1966 George and Neal decided to visit the year 0, but the adventures they had in year 0 were so debaucherous that all reference to the year has bee...
  • europe - (3 Other Entries)
    • Tooth-whitening Toothpaste - George and Neal hit great fame in the late '80s after successfully marketing a tooth-whitening toothpaste. However, when it was discovered that the "p...
    • Geal - In 1955, a small village in Transylvania attempted to assassinate George and Neal for inventing Pig Latin. All attempts were unsuccessful, in part bec...
    • 1 Already Displayed with Another Tag
  • george's genious - (No Other Entries)
  • miley cyrus is not in this post in any way - (6 Other Entries)
    • Role Playing, SFW-style - In 2013, Neal introduced George to the role-playing game, Dungeons and Dragons. George thought it was fantastic, as it blended his love of story tell...
    • Oh Wilson, Wherefore Art Thou Wilson - Unbeknownst to many, and typical for a Hollywood film, 2000s blockbuster hit Cast Away, starring Tom Hanks, was nowhere near as good as the Broadway m...
    • Yes, they really said that. - In 2024 George and Neal published a collection of lesser known quotes by famous people. They compiled this collection of quotes by painstakingly trave...
    • The Wilhelm Scream and Other Sounds - The Wilhelm Scream is pretty well known for being a sound effect used in many, many movies. What is less well known is that George and Neal also prov...
    • Joanie Loves Churros - In 1978 a temporary glitch in George and Neal's Time Machine (well, not so much a glitch as Neal spilling a tub of Tang drink mix onto the controls - ...
    • Show All...
  • neal's thighs - (No Other Entries)
  • north america - (1 Other Entry)
    • 1 Already Displayed with Another Tag
  • south america - (2 Other Entries)
    • El Niño and La Niña - On a trip to northwestern Peru in 1923 George and Neal both befriended and eventually married the Lopez sisters. The sisters gave birth to two childre...
    • 1 Already Displayed with Another Tag
  • we built this city on rock and roll - (2 Other Entries)
    • Swingin' Records! - In 2016, George and Neal turned their attention to songwriting. They ghost-wrote a string of musical hits, including "We Built This City" by Starship...
    • We Made Bon Jovi Cool - In early 1986 Bon Jovi was working on their album Slippery When Wet. Because their previous album wasn't as successful as they had hoped, they hired ...
View All Tags

Other Posts:

  • The Rolling Beatles - So very, very tired of endless "Beatles vs. Stones" arguments, in 2022, George and Neal decided to do the only logical thing to resolve the issue: go ...
  • Where did 'C' go? - Unfortunately, sometimes George and Neal's time (mis)adventures cause unforeseeable consequences. For example, in 1978, the letter/sound "c" was elim...
  • Neal Simon's Manhood - Also in 2009, Neal's manhood became sentient and demanded to secede from his body. It was thought, (only by George, known by the rest of the world) th...
  • On Online Dating - After the success of online dating websites such as "Eharmony" and "J-Date" (a social/dating website for Jewish people), George and Neal created their...
  • President Obama's Education Recovery Effort - In 2010, as part of President Obama's Education Recovery Effort, George & Neal's list of accomplishments became mandatory curriculum from 4th grade up...


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